Woman Epically Claps Back At Best Friend's Fiancée Who Accused Her Of Being In Love With Groom

They say to never ask a question you aren't prepared to hear the answer for.

Yet people do it all the time.

A woman who was tapped to be her best friend's best man turned to the "Am I The A**hole" (AITA) subReddit for feedback after the bride interrogated her.

Salt-Courage-5264 asked:

"AITA for telling my best friend's fiancée why I'm not in love with him?"

The original poster (OP) explained:

"I (30, female) am best friends with David (30, male). David and I met freshman year of college and clicked right away. We were even roommates for a while, and right now we work for the same company in different divisions."

"After a decade of friendship, I know David's not what I want in a partner. He has a huge ego and can be selfish and melodramatic. Even his family admits he can be arrogant and careless."

"I noticed a lot of positive changes in him when he met Trish. He asks other people how they are now, he's kinder. He started therapy. It's nice to see him work on himself."

"Last month, David asked me to be his best man. I've been involved with a lot of wedding party stuff on the groom's side, so it was nice when Trish asked me out to dinner with her side of the bridal party. It was an ambush."

"Trish and her maid-of-honor (MOH) asked me if David and I ever hooked up and flat-out if I was in love with him. I said we never had and that I wasn't. Trish seemed weirded out by that answer and pushed further."

"It went from being 'do you like David?' to 'why don't you like David?' real fast. I deflected and said he wasn't my type, but they kept pushing."

"Finally, I said he's arrogant and I don't have the energy to feed his ego, and that's not what I want in a partner. The rest of the bridesmaids kind of laughed, Trish and her MOH got upset, so we ended the night."

"Later, Trish texted the wedding party group chat saying she didn't want me in the wedding because I said horrible things about David and called him an egomaniac. All his family and friends chimed in laughing, agreeing, and calling him a selfish jerk and recounting all the times he pulled some bullsh*t for attention (things like faking a crisis, deliberately letting his car run out of gas so you won't ask him for favors, basic weaponized incompetence)."

"David joined in and laughed, saying Trish made him want to work hard on himself. Trish saw that as David siding with me despite him literally stating to their family and friends in the chat that she made him want to be a better person."

"David's sister told me yesterday that Trish is still upset about how I responded, and she's convinced I said these things because I want David. I texted David and asked him to talk to Trish about it and that I would be willing to drop out of the wedding party if she was really that uncomfortable."

"David said he'd handle it, but I'm worried I was too blunt and either A: started drama accidentally or B: fell into one of David's drama traps and he's not as changed as we all think."

Redditors weighed in using the AITA voting acronyms:

• NTA - Not The A**hole
• YTA - You're The A**hole
• NAH - No A**holes Here
• ESH - Everyone Sucks Here
• INFO - more information needed

Redditors decided the OP was not the a**hole (NTA).

"Don’t ask questions if you can’t handle the answer. NTA." ~ Psychonaut1008

"It sounds like the bride is just looking for an excuse to kick OP out of the wedding, which is why she and MoH arranged an 'ambush' during a bridal party. She seems jealous of OP and her bond with David." ~ IceSeeker

"I had a similar experience once, when a close friend's serious girlfriend asked me about our relationship. The difference was my friend's girlfriend wasn't just trying to set me up to fail."

"So when I finally said, 'Look, I love the guy as a friend, but as a boyfriend I knew he'd be a bit of a fixer-upper and I didn't have the patience or skill for that renovation' she burst out laughing, agreed, and we are now actually as close friends as I am with her (now) husband."

'In fact, their one big disagreement during wedding planning was about who "got" me in their side of the wedding party." ~ mstakenusername

"Hopefully the prospective groom watching this considers whether her actions warrant removing HIMSELF from the wedding as well." ~ Kodiak01

"People need to learn to control their jealousy! Like a cheater is going to cheat, whether you try to restrict them or not. If you have a good partner who wouldn't break your trust and cheat, they wont."

"It doesn't matter if they are bi, straight, gay. People need friends and can have platonic relationships, even with genders they are attracted to. Wild concept!" ~ Bromogeeksual

"There was no right answer, and it was a mistake to elaborate on anything. There was no good outcome, but giving any specifics just gave the jealous fiancée something to work with." ~ kurokomainu

"It really does suck that one person's insecurity is going to ruin a friendship that has been around longer than they have. I do not see the friendship lasting either way."

"David needs to nut up and draw a line, maybe try to get her out of her own head. I dunno, it just doesn't seem good either way." ~ terdferguson

"Trish cornered and interrogated you, then got mad when you gave an honest answer instead of playing along with her insecurity test." ~ myrxalor

"There was only one outcome of this conversation. Either Trish was going to be offended at OP for not liking David, or offended at OP for having inappropriate feelings for David. This was by design."

"Trish was looking for a fight. There was absolutely no winning in that conversation, and she is a huge AH. She wasn't going to accept that you don't like him, that was only a gateway to making you describe why, which - bam - is a gateway to shunning you for being a bad friend."

"She had an agenda, and it was probably driven by insecurity that her fiancé has a female best friend, and the visibility of you as a woman on his side of the wedding party. It's possible you could have avoided this with some other tap dancing around her questions, but probably not."

"As I said, she had an agenda, and it was to make you look bad, either as a direct threat to their relationship or an unsupportive friend to him. And, obviously, it fizzled out on her."

"It's unfortunate more people are not calling her out for this because it's shady as hell and wildly manipulative. But, I'm not seeing why you feel like maybe you fell into one of David's traps? How did he trap you in this? NTA." ~ owls_and_cardinals

"NTA. Trish has her own insecurities about her fiancé. I don't think the problem is you it is Trish. Perhaps she thinks David has a thing for you." ~ Top_Philosopher1809

"Girl they weren’t going to be happy with any answer you gave. They wanted a gotcha moment where you either admitted to history or feelings."

"They left no room for doubt that there was nothing going on. This wasn’t an investigation; it was a witch hunt. Don’t lose sleep over this, she’s drama, just tune it out." ~ Weekly_Village3628

"NTA. Trish is jealous. Pure and simple. Even if you get to be David's best man, most likely your friendship with him is over. Trish will make David's life hell until he drops you as a friend."

"Given how hard he's worked to change for her, I would not expect him to set the hard boundary he needs here to maintain your friendship. It's kind of horrible that she is marrying someone she doesn't trust enough to choose his best man wisely." ~ GreekAmericanDom

"Please. That girl already had her mind made up, no matter what answer you gave she was going to twist it to fit her narrative. It’s great David worked on himself, but that doesn’t mean she’s not a red flag herself. NTA." ~ ravynwave

"NTA. For some reason, Trish desperately wants to believe you are in love with him. Maybe she is the sort of person who only thinks she is 'winning' if someone else is 'losing'."

"Maybe she is really insecure and scared that David is only with her because you wouldn’t have him, so she needs you to secretly want him to prove he really wants her. Maybe some of David’s arrogance has rubbed off on her and she just can’t believe everyone isn’t in love with him."

"Let him deal with it." ~ Historical_Agent9426

"You asked David to handle it. He's your friend and will try to help Trish understand that you are truly only friends. Obviously she has past trust issues, and is passing it along to you and David."

"Allow him to bear the drama his fiancée is trying to stir up. If I were to pick the drama stirrer here, I would say it was Trish and not your friend. If he can't work it out, then bow out of the wedding."

"This sounds like it's going to take some time for Trish to be comfortable and trust you both." ~ Kindly-Push-3460

OP was asked a question and answered it honestly.

If Trish wasn't prepared for that answer, she shouldn't have asked.