Audience expectations differ from place to place.
At concerts or sporting events, some interaction, and respectful noise, whereas at theater or ballet, silence is expected.
First-time audience members at various events might not be prepared for what is expected of them.
Sometimes requiring a little instruction from more experienced attendees.
Redditor Upstairs-Course-2552 recently attended a ticketed event they had greatly been looking forward to.
Unfortunately, an audience member sitting next to the original poster (OP) was behaving in a way that severely challenged their enjoyment.
When the OP asked them to stop, they were met with anything but understanding.
Wondering if they stepped out of line, the OP took to the subReddit "Am I The A**Hole" (AITA), where they asked fellow Redditors:
"AITA asking a kid to not sing at live theatre?"
The OP explained why they felt compelled to offer some unsolicited parenting advice:
"I saw 'Hamilton 'tonight on stage."
"Touring show in Orlando."
"Not a special sing-a-long version or anything."
"A family of 3 sat next to me with a kid of about 10."
"From the first line, the kid sang or said every word."
"On occasion, the mom joined in."
"I often heard them over the show."
"After 30 minutes, as politely as possible, I asked the mom to please not sing and talk during the show."
"The mom looked at me like I’m a monster and said she wasn’t going to ask a kid that loves the show and is super excited to see it not to sing."
"I left, said something to the theatre staff, and they moved me."
"My knowledge of etiquette says you stay quiet in a theatre."
"AITA?"
Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation by declaring:
- NTA - Not The A**hole
- YTA - You're The A**hole
- NAH - No A**holes Here
- ESH - Everyone Sucks Here
The Reddit community unanimously agreed that the OP was not the a**hole for asking the child to stop singing.
Everyone agreed that the OP paid to hear professional actors sing, not the child, and that their parents should have taught them proper etiquette.
"NTA."
"You paid to hear professional actors perform, not to attend a $100+ karaoke session for an entitled mom and her kid."-Spectre_Omega
"NTA."
"If they want to sing along, the show is on Disney +."- stinkybinkyboo
"NTA."
"Mom is doing that kid no favors."- baboonontheride
"NTA."
"Nobody came to the theater to listen to the mom or her child sing."
"It wasn't an interactive performance; they were being rude."- simplewilddog
"NTA it's against theatre etiquette to sing along."
"People pay to hear the performers, not the audience."
"That's why sing-alongs exist."
"If you want to sing, you go to the appropriate show for it."- Professional-Scar628
"NTA."
"If it’s not a sing-along, then you should be quiet and respectful during the performance."- Potatobubblegum
"NTA that would drive me insane."
"Very glad you got yourself a new seat."- Jerseygirl2468
"NTA."
"Unless the show is encouraging audience participation, then you sit down and STFU."- Owen8288
"NTA."
"I’m a music teacher."
"I specifically teach kids how to behave in situations like that."- Some_Store7658
"NTA."
"People attend shows to hear the cast sing, not the audience."
"Many shows I've been to have had to remind the attendees of this fact."- poptophazard
"Only show singing along is acceptable is Rocky Horror Picture Show."
"I will die on this hill."
"NTA."- Umeyard
"NTA."
"The theatre staff should have asked them to shut up or leave."
"Enough said."
"Glad they moved you."- Desperate_Process_89
"NTA."
"I bet everyone within earshot of them were extremely grateful you spoke up."
"I hope you were moved to better seats."- crazyKatLady_555
"NTA!"
"My daughter is 11, and was introduced to Hamilton at ten; she knows every freakin word."
"We have had to tell her she CANNOT sing along if we see it live."
"This is also the rule she had to follow when she saw 'Wicked' at age nine, despite knowing the whole score."
"Those tickets are expensive. I would have gone full Karen and told an Usher."
"Nobody pays that kind of money to listen to a kid next to them have Main Character Energy."
"Whattheactualf*ck?"- Spicy7997
"NTA."
"That mother was rude as hell, as is anyone who sings along at a professional performance that is not specifically a sing along show. "
"You were right to go to the ushers when she proved to have terrible manners."- CaptainFartHole
"NTA."
"Ushers should have been doing something about it."- tremble_lip
"NTA."
"That parent has a hand in what's wrong with the world."
"She thinks it revolves around her special little snowflake."
"We saw one of those candlelight concerts."
"It was Classic Rock on Strings."
"Six-piece string ensemble."
"Beautiful intimate setting, dark except for the (electric) candles."
"Music was gorgeous."
"Until these 2 twenty something buffoons started singing (horribly) to all the songs."
"The rest of the audience was miffed; the musicians were noticeably uncomfortable."
"The A-holes were finally escorted out but not without a disturbance on the way out of the theater and into the lobby."
"A-holes."- chilibeana
"Absolutely NTA."
"Singing along is for very specific shows (Six and &Juliet have done singalong versions before) or occasionally a finale where the audience is encouraged to join in."
"It’s definitely not for the show itself."- peppermintaerobubble
"NTA."
"You're not paying to hear the kid and her mom sing."
"You approached the problem correctly - you asked them to be quiet, then elevated your complaint to the staff."- Itchy_Juice_2528
"NTA."
"That family was 100% in the wrong."
"You pay to hear the performers, not your neighbors."- Rare-Progress5009
"NTA."
"Parent should have taught and enforced proper theatre etiquette."
"Let him sing along at home to the soundtrack."- Mysterious_Wait_3451
"NTA."
"Gigantic theatre nerd here, saw my first musical at 6 after begging my parents for tickets for a year."
"At the show I was sat between my mom and my grandma with extremely strict instructions not to make a peep unless it was an emergency - in which case I could whisper to my mom."
"I had an amazing time at that show."
"So did the people around me (I hope)."- PuzzleheadedAsk4505
"NTA, when I was a kid in NYC public schools, our teacher got to take us to see Tommy and The Who."
"He taught us about how we were to behave in that theater, sit in your seat, keep quiet amongst other things."
"He would have pulled us outta there so quick if we had talked or sang!"- SpiralBreeze
"NTA."
"They should have enforced the rules with the family then kicked them out if they didn’t follow them."- bostoncrabapple
"NTA."
"You just live in a country increasingly filled with self-absorbed, rude people."- WinterAir4769
"NTA! "
"That's absurd!"
"We're all excited to see THE ACTORS SING!"
"Adult or child, if they can't just silently hum along and tap their foot, they have no business in a theater that isn't a showing for children or sing-along."
"That's not harsh; that's just unacceptable."
"At that age it's just rude."
"Both mother and child."- monkerry
"NTA, kid is old enough to know theater etiquette & to understand other people paid to see the performers."- LittleCowGirl
"NTA."
"I get frustrated with people glimpsing their phone constantly in the movie theaters; I couldn't fathom going to an actual Broadway-style show and having someone singing along the entire time."
"Sadly, sounds like they didn't learn anything and will be portraying you as the villain for the unforeseen future when they talk about the Hamilton show the child 'loves'."- EnigmaGuy
"Oh HEEELLLLLL NO!"
"You didn't pay to see Chucky sing."
"You paid to see the actual actors sing."
"No f**king way."
"NTA."
"In any way, shape, or form."- ParticularHappy6587
"NTA."
"Every theater parent thinks their child is the next Idina Menzel."
"If your child loves live performances, teach them live-performance etiquette."- Significant_Cup4521
"NTA."
"That wasn’t Hamiltunes."
"It was a professional performance."
"Ushers should have made them leave."- Imsortofok
"I personally think NTA, as you were polite about it and then just moved yourself."- marvchuk
"NTA!"
"Yes, it can feel 'mean' to confront people in situations like this, because there's honestly no 'nice' way to go about it...and that's because what THEY are doing is rude and obnoxious, so they need to be confronted."
"So any interaction with them will seem 'confrontational'."
"But like others have already said: You didn't buy tickets to listen to the AUDIENCE sing."
"They need to stfu."
"Honestly, there should be signs at events like this to remind the audience members that singing along is not acceptable."- Feldan_Ospreigh
It's sweet and touching that the child was so excited to see Hamilton, and knew all the words to all the songs going in.
Even so, while he's more than welcome to sing along in the car, he needed to leave the singing to the professionals.
Something his mother should have taught him before the show started; while this might have been the first time another audience member scolded him, it won't be the last if he keeps it up.
Woman Irate After 'Misogynistic' Date 'Insults' Her In Front Of Waiter For Interrupting Him
While dating is supposed to be fun and the best way to find new love, some people are just not meant to date each other.
Fortunately, people can get out of dating someone, and no reason is too small or petty, members of the "Am I Overreacting?" (AIO) subreddit pointed out.
Redditor Mental_Driver_6134 had been dating a guy on and off for over a year, and while things were okay, there hadn't been a particular reason to make the relationship more serious.
When they went on a date, and the guy publicly insulted her for interrupting him and speaking out of turn, the Original Poster (OP) was not certain it was worth going on another date with him or continuing to string this situationship along.
She asked the sub:
At a restaurant, the OP's date wasn't being clear while speaking with the waiter.
"I went on a dinner date with this guy who I've been with for over a year now, on and off. We discussed the order and were in a good mood overall."
"When the waiter came to take the order, he started explaining him something about his preference for a particular dish. Basically, he didn't want too much garlic in chili burnt garlic noodles."
"Everything was going fine, but I saw that he was taking too much time explaining it and wasn't really getting to the main point, which was less garlic."
"I chimed in and casually said, 'We just want less garlic.'"
"But I couldn't even complete the sentence before he said to me in front of the waiter, 'If you're gonna cut me off like this, I'm not giving any orders, okay?!' in the rudest way possible."
The moment ruined the date for the OP.
"I just went quiet after that. He quickly realized that he made a mistake and tried to cover up by saying that, 'Okay , I won't shout at you next time onwards.'"
"I was really p**sed off but didn't react much to avoid creating a scene."
"On our way back home, he started with his explanation. He said that I tried to make him feel small by cutting him off and lacked basic etiquette and that I should have at least said, 'Can I give my opinion here?- before cutting him off."
"It kept getting worse as he said that since he was the older one and 'The Man,' I should not have interrupted him and let him give the order."
"The whole tone was so misogynistic."
"He even mocked me for not knowing how to use chopsticks properly, which I didn't mind as basic banter, and I told him that there are forks and spoons kept here; it's not necessary to use the chopsticks (he ended up dropping his dumpling while explaining to me how to use chopsticks)."
"When the noodles came, he said that we could use forks then, and I was like, 'No, why not use chopsticks here, as well? You should watch more anime, maybe,' and he then went on to brag about having been to many five-star restaurants, which implied that he knew more than me and that I lacked any 'real experience.'"
The OP was over it by the end of the conversation.
"I was too exhausted from this; it seemed so nonsensical that I left later and told him to maintain a distance."
"Later he was saying that I'm stuck on such a small thing and that he won't shout again, but it was my mistake that I tried to cut him off (which wasn't my intention at all)."
"Also, sidenote: He's like four and a half years older than me. I met him last September and on and off many times with a few months of minimal contact. These offs end with him acting as if nothing happened."
"This incident was the calmest he's behaved if compared to past situations, so you can guess what the worst may have looked like."
"I only gave him a chance cause he was trying to control his anger issues. But I think you can't expect a 29-year-old to fix the misogyny."
Fellow Redditors weighed in:
Some reassured the OP that she was right to be upset.
"He was s**tty, but it was her fault; I just love that. NOR."
"If she hadn’t interrupted his highness, none of this would have happened. Why can’t she just admit it?"
"I’m so glad I’m long out of the dating pool. There is no bar anymore; it’s what can I get from you while I treat you like s**t. Man, the good old days of dating are long over." - Shadow4summer
"NOR. The 'I'm the man' line revealed everything OP needs to know about him. He couldn't handle a simple, harmless interruption, so he tried to humiliate her in public to regain control. Taking his own dumpling dive while trying to act superior is peak karma, honestly." - virelaczi
"NOR! If a 'small' man tries to put you down in public on a date, run the eff away! It doesn’t matter if it’s two dates, two months, or two YEARS!" - Delicious_Winner_819
"Not overreacting, this man is clearly insecure and controlling. Not to mention a misogynist. Instead of being on and off, just be off. It's better to be single than to be with someone who tries to make you feel less than." - curiouscuriel
"'I know better than you.'"
"Should tell you ALL you need to know about this 'man'. Go and find somebody who will treat you as their person... and not an object. That is what is not sitting right with you."
"NOR. And bloody run!!! I wouldn't even give him the time of day after an experience like that." - pootling_1976
"My ex would constantly say, 'You're interrupting me.' I was not. He was a psycho."
"This is how it went, for example:"
"Him: I am ordering chicken and snow peas and white rice [long pause]."
"I start to say ANYTHING (the place is on effing fire!), and he would berate me, 'You interrupted me, you ALWAYS do that, I can never speak, blah, blah blah.'"
"I say, 'Lucifer (what I call him behind his back), you took a long pause. I waited, and I thought you were done.'"
"Then THAT becomes a pile of s**t convo, more berating... He was so manipulative and verbally abusive; I cannot even scratch the surface here."
"So, no. That date is a Lucifer, and you should never even speak to him again." - Belmontisnowhideous
Others pointed out that the OP didn't have to keep dating him if this is how she felt about him.
"Great news! You do not need to spend any more time with this guy." - Blue-flash
"If you marry this guy, this behavior will only get worse. He doesn’t respect women, and he probably never will. I'd stop dating him now before you waste more time." - Additional-Start9455
"NOR. Don’t waste another minute of your life on an angry man. He’ll get worse, not better. Just find a guy who doesn’t need fixing." - Broad_Pomegranate141
"I mean, him being an insufferable smug jerk is not a small thing."
"'I went on a dinner date with this guy who I've been with for over a year now, on and off.' But this strikes me as an elephant in the room."
"It isn't often that good, healthy relationships are on and off again. And given how profoundly rude he was, how immediately he doubled down, how condescending, etc., I can't help but think this isn't the first time he's been gross as a partner."
"NOR, but really ask yourself what you're doing here. This can't be the life you hoped for, and you know he isn't going to change as well." - Traeyze
"NOR. There's no way to live with this kind of man, honestly, and OP should definitely leave this guy."
"A year of on and off with kind of behavior is basically a preview of the next ten." - NoEar4226
"NOR. I've broken up with guys like that by telling them they were right all along. I'm just not smart enough for him. He deserves someone on his own level..."
"Hopefully he picks up the hint and does some self-reflection for his future dates (with other women)."
"For what it's worth, I have two post-graduate degrees." - PomeloPepper
"When someone treats you like s**t, you do NOT have to stay with them, no matter how long you've been together."
"Unfortunately, my therapist had to explain this to me a short time after I started seeing her because my parents never gave me any autonomy to make my own decisions. I didn’t know that I could just leave places that I didn’t feel safe in because it wasn’t an option for me until then."
"Some people do need to be given permission to do what’s best for them because of the way they were treated by their parents."
"Hopefully she does leave him because he sucks, and with the way he treats her, things will likely get worse for her." - Accomplished_Dig284
We've all heard the advice to not cry over spilled milk, but clearly, this date must fuss over garlicky noodles.
To the subReddit, it wasn't worth continuing to date a man who clearly had anger and control issues, especially given everything going on in society right now.
The OP would be better off staying single for a while or dating someone new, preferably someone who respects their differences about noodles and chopsticks.