The transition from childhood to adulthood is never smooth. It can be a bumpy, turbulent ride from the moment puberty begins.
Redditor Perfect_Ad5464 is reaching the end of high school, and getting ready for the next step in her life. However, her parents might want her to grow up a little more, a little sooner than she should have to.
The original poster (OP) is adamantly against her parents’ plan, but she feels guilt over her choice. She needed a little bit of perspective.
So OP decided to ask the “Am I the A**hole” (AITA) subReddit about what happened.
The difference between her ideas and her parents are a little much.
“AITA for refusing to let my future baby half sibling live in the same room as me?”
But is she in the right?
“I’m a 17 year old girl and my mom and step father recently got pregnant. My family is kind of confusing so to sum it up, my older half brother, 19, he’s my step fathers and my mom’s child, and I’m my mom and my dad’s child.”
“We live in a three bedroom house, the master suite, my brothers bedroom and my bedroom. We also have a basement with a bathroom.”
“When I found out my parents were pregnant one of their first requests was that the baby share my room. I immediately declined because they wanted a newborn not to sleep in their room, but in mine, while I was finishing my last year of highschool and preparing for college.”
“I said no and the baby should sleep in their room, and when it was old enough to have its own room I would already have moved out. (One of my friends is kinda rich and her parents are gonna buy her an apartment for college and she told me I could stay there for cheap.)”
“They got really mad at me and told me how much stress they would have after having.”
“Now I understand pregnancy is hard and all, but I really don’t want to have to listen to a baby crying, have them run into my room when I’m sleeping, doing homework etc.”
“I told them that I thought it would be easier if the baby stayed in their room, or if I moved to the basement, but that would be a little annoying as our basement isn’t really room fit, like idk how to describe it but I wouldn’t want to live there.”
“I understand I might be a little rude because my parents wont have their baby till February (They r like 2 months pregnant or something idk they just said the due date is in February)”
“But I feel like that’s going to be a incredibly stressful time even for just the the fourish months I’m staying here, you know with school ending, college entrance exams, waiting to see if I got in, etc. all the works.”
“And on a more personal note I hate babies, they weird me out. I’m thinking I could be in the wrong because their room is more cluttered than mine, and they could have a problem making space.”
“And my parents have their ideas yk, so I could just be biased so am I in the wrong??”
OP just wants to finish her high school year in peace, and feels the baby should be solely the responsibility of her parents. But her parents are insistent that the baby will keep them up at a difficult time.
On Reddit, the users of the board judged OP for refusing to share a room with her baby sister by including one of the following in their response:
- NTA – Not the A**hole
- YTA – You’re the A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everybody Sucks Here
In the end, it’s OP’s parents’ responsibility to care for the baby. For most new parents, this is easiest if the baby if in the room with you.
And in fact, most new parents have the baby sleep in the same room for a period of time after birth.
On top of that, OP is trying to finish high school, which can be difficult as it is. This would be unnecessary stress to put on a child.
OP is NTA for just wanting to keep her own room for a few months more.
“NTA. baby cries a lot in night and its not your responsibility . You will not be able to sleep whole night if the baby moves in with you.” – anneisangy
“Stressful for the actual parents to have their baby in their room but it’s fine if the make the daughter have the baby in their room? Wow” – mortgage_gurl
“They want the baby in your room because they want you taking care of it. And they will probably expect you to babysit and change diapers, etc…”
“There’s even a good chance that they expect you to stay living with them instead of going away so they get free childcare.”
“Stick to your boundaries. This isn’t your baby and your parents need to make plans that don’t rely on you.” – teresajs
“Maybe I spend too much time on this sub & am terminally cynical, but I was thinking the same… They’re trying to sabotage OP’s last year of HS so that she will be a live-in nanny.” – coffe_cats_books
“NTA. As someone who has shared a room with an infant sibling I can almost promise that within a week or two the expectation would be that you cover the 2 am feeding and begin taking on more and more of the care.”
“Your parents are the ones who decided to have an infant–let them be the ones to take care of it.” – IAmHerdingCatz
“If your room is more spacious, can you swap rooms with them?”
“NTA. Senior year is super important and it’s not your responsibility to look after your infant sibling. It’s your parents’ responsibility.”
“You can help them if you wish to, but they should be the ones staying with the baby, not you.”
“It makes no sense that they’ll run to your room in the middle of the night, when it will be easier for them if the baby is closer.” – SideAggressive420
“NTA. Your future is important and it’s not okay to decide that you will be disrupted because they decided to have a baby.”
“Even if you liked them, asking you to do this would be a lot considering you’re preparing for uni and it’s a crucial moment for you and your future.”
“Maybe suggest to switch your rooms if yours is bigger? That way you get to be alone and they get the bigger room to get the baby with them.”
“Is your brother’s room big as well? Have they thought about letting the baby sleep there? I’m wondering if they’re not expecting you to do the work for them while they sleep honestly…” – OctavusM
OP’s family dynamic is intriguing. Her older brother is the product of her mother and stepfather, and she’s from her mother and father.
It became clear that there’s a little more going on between them that might explain how the parents expect OP to host her younger sibling.
“It’s their child and if they didn’t want to deal with a newborn baby crying at night, they shouldn’t have had another baby, not expect their daughter (who is still a minor herself) to do it for them.”
“Also, how is your older brother your stepfathers child? Did your mum and SF break up for a bit, your mum had you and then your mum and SF get back together?” – Kindly_Reward_8537
“Uhm, my mother cheated on my father with my stepfather and then hid my brother from him for two years and then when she was pregnant with me she thought it was my stepfathers child so she broke up with my dad and married my stepfather but then paternity test and all that showed that I was my dads child.” – Perfect_Ad5464 (OP)
“That’s just a load of BS on the part of your parents. They are having a baby you are not. You shouldn’t be expected to put up with a fussy infant in your room.”
“You can bet that they’re going to also expect you to deal with it a lot. So, be sure to set that boundary and hold firm. That you are not a baby sitter.”
“I’d make this a hill to die on.”
“Is moving in with your Dad an option?” – Velocityg4
“they had a whole custody battle when i was younger and it would just be nearly impossible because of stuff they set up but i did look into that alot when i was younger” – Perfect_Ad5464 (OP)
“That’s too bad. Since you’re seventeen now. If your dad went back to court, the judge would most likely go with your wishes on the matter.”
“Unless your dad did something really wrong.” – Velocityg4
“maybe I should look into it again then lol, he didnt do something wrong just was poorer and couldnt get that good of a lawyer.” – Perfect_Ad5464 (OP)
OP has some options to look into, but regardless, she should remain firm in not letting her parents walk all over her.