Woman Livid After Jobless Roommate Buys Brand New Laptop After Asking Her To Cover Her Rent

Money makes the world go round.

It can also be a real problem in personal relationships.

Lending money to loved ones is often an issue.

There should be open and honest dialogue.

And strict parameters may need to be set when discussing financial loans.

Redditor Direct_Divide_7272 to discuss her experience and get some feedback, so naturally, she came to the "Am I The A**hole" (AITA) subreddit.

She asked:

"AITA for demanding my unemployed roommate pay me back after seeing her buy a MacBook?"

The Original Poster (OP) explained:

"So my (34 F[eamle]) roommate (32 F) and I have been living together for 2 years now."

"We split rent 50/50 even though my room is slightly larger, but I cook more, so it evens out."

"She lost her job last month and asked if I could pay her share of the rent until she gets a new job."

"I said yes since we are friends and times are hard."

"Fast forward to yesterday."

"I come home from work and see her unpacking a brand new MacBook ($2000+) and some clothes."

"I asked her where she got the money to buy this when she doesn't have a job and she became defensive and told me her parents sent her money for her birthday."

"I informed her that if she can afford luxury products, she should repay me the rent I paid immediately."

"She claimed the money from her parents is a gift exclusively for those products and that I volunteered without any conditions."

"I reminded her I am not rich either, and I missed a weekend getaway with my friends in order to pay her rent."

"She began crying and told me that I was being materialistic and did not understand her problem."

"I discovered this morning I received half the rent money in an envelope with a message stating she'd pay the other half when she can but won't speak to me much anymore."

"I don't feel I'm being unfair in demanding my money when she's spending money on non-necessities, but perhaps I should have been more compassionate?"

The OP was left to wonder:

"So... AITA?"

Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed some options to the question AITA:

• NTA - Not The A**hole
• YTA – You're The A**hole
• NAH – No A**holes Here
• ESH - Everyone Sucks Here

Many Redditors declared that OP was NOT the A**hole.

"She started crying and said you don't understand her problems?"

"No, I don't understand using your birthday money to buy a $2K laptop while letting your roommate sacrifice her weekend to pay YOUR rent either."

"Pay up. NTA." ~ Big_Bookkeeper1678

"This kind of story is so common, and I've never understood the perspective of people who will use any excuse not to prioritize paying back a friend who didn't have to help them."

"They'll leverage a friendship to gain a 'loan' but then use the friendship to justify not paying it back?"

"No, just no. NTA." ~ CaptainZeroDark30

"She's buying luxuries instead of paying rent??"

"Even if her story is true, she should have said to her parents, 'Thank you so much for offering to buy me some clothes and a MacBook, but honestly, what I really need now that I lost my job is to cover my rent until I find a new one.'"

"'Would you mind if I took the cash and put it towards rent (or even took the portion of the cash that went on clothing)?'"

"NTA. She should be paying her debts, including the one to you, before she buys luxuries."

"I might make an exception for a computer, which is essential for many people, but I suspect that whatever her computing needs, there are cheaper options than a MacBook." ~ SavingsRhubarb8746

"NTA. She's leaching off you."

"Also, I find it hard to believe that her parents sent her thousands of dollars for her birthday to buy a MacBook and clothes while she was unemployed and struggling to pay rent."

"It's far more likely that they sent that money to help her pay her bills." ~ Momjamoms

"I'm sorry to tell you, but she's a user, and you've been played."

"Cut your losses, move out, and don't expect to be paid the balance of what you are owed."

"I don't think the friendship survives this. It's a hard lesson for you both, I'm afraid." ~ AdAutomatic3654

"Her parents will buy/gift her money for a Macbook but not rent ???? NTA." ~ Appropriate-Baby-431

"NTA. You didn't volunteer to cover her rent - she asked you to cover it."

"If her parents can afford to gift her a $2000 Macbook, plus clothes, they can afford to cover her rent, too."

"Most likely, they had no idea that her roommate was covering her rent." ~ Ornery-Wasabi-473

"Her parents should have paid her rent if they could afford to send her thousands of dollars to buy gifts."

"Also, when asking a friend to pay your rent, it's usually implied that you'll pay them back once you're working again."

"So either way, she should be paying you back."

"No one lives or eats for free."

"You're NTA." ~ ThrowRevenueNSWaway

"NAH. I feel it's reasonable to ask about some expensive stuff being bought when the person owes you money, but also these things might help her get a job."

"If the money was sent specifically for those things to be bought, then that's fair enough."

"I'd not expect her to sell an already owned laptop to pay me back."

"Personally, I'd be looking to come up with a plan for how long you're going to pay rent for; three months, six months, etc, then stick to that."

"I'd also be asking questions as to why her parents can send her money for these things but not help her out with rent?"

"Do they know she's lost her job?" ~ FatRascal_

"NTA. If I've borrowed money from someone, paying them back is my #1 priority."

"You don't get to have fancy presents etc, if you have no job and owe rent money." ~ ResolveResident118

"NTA. I'm guessing she hasn't told her parents she doesn't have a job."

"Time to tell them, and she needs to figure out a way to pay or move back in with the parents or couch surf somewhere else."

"It's ok to be empathetic, but you're not her sugar mama." ~ myopini0n

"NTA - You aren't being unfair to her."

"She's too old to not understand that her behavior is disrespectful and a sign of poor character."

"Instead of being grateful that you helped her, she took you for granted."

"She's either immature or stupid. Let her call it anything she likes as long as she pays you back."

"Give her the cold shoulder."

"Her threatening not to speak to you is like threatening you with a good time."

"Do you really want to associate with someone who takes your kindness for weakness? No." ~ BeeJackson

"Am I losing my mind here?"

"You're NAH but I'm not convinced she is either."

"I find it entirely reasonable that her parents may have bought her this gift, especially considering she may be in a rough place right now."

"And what do you expect her to do - sell a gift her parents just gave her?"

"Question - does her potential career require a new laptop?"

"Is she perhaps in tech, a coder, graphic design, etc.?"

"Or on a personal level, is she a gamer?"

"I don't know. I don't think you're an AH, but I don't think your roommate is either."

"You offered to help unconditionally." ~ bkguyworksinnyc

"NTA. If I lost my job and my parents could help out, I'd cover my necessities before asking for luxuries."

"While I do mentally get where she's coming from, it's nice to be able to treat yourself on your birthday- it came at YOUR expense." ~ Rare-Progress5009

"NTA. People need to afford basic necessities before luxuries, and it's messed up that your friend expected you to be ok with her prioritizing luxury overpaying you back for necessities."

"She lost her job and is likely struggling right now, sure, but she's still being selfish, which has consequences."

"If her parents have MacBook money, maybe she needs to ask them for rent money next." ~ MochaMellie

"NTA- Why wasn't she asking her parents to pay her rent instead of asking you?"

"Your friend is grossly immature and selfish."

"Let her stay mad; when the lease is up, find a new roommate." ~ No_Stage_6158

"NAH - assuming that the roommate isn't lying."

"If her parents did earmark this money for a laptop, I don't think it would be fair for you to ask that she repay you with those funds."

"For example, if her parents sent her the laptop instead, how would you feel?"

"But I also don't think you're in a position to cover her rent until she finds a job, nor is this your responsibility."

"Has she told her parents about her job loss?"

"See if she can borrow some money from her parents instead." ~ haokun32

"Pay her share of the rent until she has a job and salary?"

"That could take months… any normal person pays back the people who bailed them out of a bind."

"You are NTA."

"Reminds me of a friendship lost while I tried to help get a house after her relationship ended."

"I was trying to save up to do things I postponed because I helped."

"She came into some money and prioritized getting her eyes lasered so she could finally dump her glasses."

"You really get to know people when money is involved." ~ Which-Pin515

Reddit is with you, OP.

You gave her that money in good faith.

And as a sacrifice to yourself.

Did she need this new laptop?

You have every right to ask for your money.