Content Warning: Racism, Racist Remarks, Name-shaming
There’s a time and a place for most behaviors, including standing against racism and sexism.
But make sure that you know the whole story before you speak out, cringed the members of the “Am I the A**hole?” (AITAH) subReddit.
Redditor Equivalent-Pitch5177 was on rotation in the ER when a new nurse was also put on rotation. When she told the head nurse which patient she would visit next, she was alarmed when the new nurse lashed out at her, accusing her of using a racial slur to describe the patient.
Since she was completely wrong about the racial slur and created a scene in front of the entire Emergency Room, the Original Poster (OP) reported the new nurse to HR.
She asked the sub:
“AITAH for getting my new coworker fired for falsely accusing me of being racist?”
The OP was assigned a patient with an unexpected last name.
“I work in healthcare, and this situation has caused a huge stir among my coworkers.”
“I work in the ER as a nurse. A few weeks ago, there was a new nurse working who was in her first week working with me that day.”
“I was talking to the CNA about a new patient I had just been assigned. I should note, this patient’s name includes a word that is usually a racial slur or a racist nickname for their race.”
“I don’t want to elaborate on what their name is for patient privacy. I know it’s not great to say it, but hypothetically, you could think of it as being ‘Mr Ching Chong.'”
The new nurse on rotation thought that the OP was being condescending.
“I said to the CNA, ‘I need to go check on Mr. [last name redacted].'”
“The new nurse gave me a crazy look, and said, ‘I can’t believe you just called your patient that.'”
“I tried to stop her and explain that that’s actually his name, but she kept yelling and cussing at me, calling me a racist.”
“It was super embarrassing, and it got the attention of several staff members, patients, and visitors.”
“After she calmed down and breathed for a second, the CNA told her that it’s the patient’s legal name.”
“She looked in disbelief, and she was shown their chart. She awkwardly laughed and apologized, but the damage was done.”
The OP spoke up about the incident.
“I went to HR right after my shift ended, and they fired her within an hour. She was in her 90-day period, and they figured it wasn’t worth it to keep her when she had already created a hostile work environment.”
“Several coworkers have defended her and said she thought she was standing up to racism.”
“I think she should’ve let me f**king speak after she said, ‘I can believe you said that,’ because I was about to tell her that it was their actual name. I don’t think screaming and going off like that in the workplace is appropriate anyway.”
“Was I wrong to go to HR? I need some peace of mind on the subject.”
“AITAH?”
Fellow Redditors weighed in:
- NTA: Not the A**hole
- YTA: You’re the A**hole
- ESH: Everybody Sucks Here
- NAH: No A**holes Here
Some argued that the new nurse didn’t stand up to racism; she made a scene.
“Standing up to racism is important, but so is handling it appropriately. Screaming and accusing someone publicly, especially in a hospital, is not the way to do it, especially when you’re new and don’t have the full picture.” – Amon-Leopard3120
“They fired her for her lack of professionalism. She behaved incredibly unprofessionally, and she was fired for that, not because she ‘stood up to racism.'”
“Everyone should take a stand against racism, but yelling, screaming, etc., is not standing up to racism. That is just behaving unprofessionally. Had she taken it to HR or her supervisor, that would have been different.” – Organic-Willow2835
“You don’t stand up to unacceptable behavior by screaming from the first second. You calmly state your concern, perhaps why it’s unacceptable, and give the other person a chance to respond.”
“If it keeps going and they don’t listen, you still don’t scream, this is what HR is for.”
“So they went about this not only in a toxic way but in a way that won’t ever fix the problem in society they want to be changed. Cause even if op was in the wrong, screaming from moment one just isn’t very educational, inspirational, nor compelling.” – Allilujah406
“NTA. She didn’t just get fired for calling you a racist. She also made a huge scene in a professional setting with patients around. NTA.” – KronkLaSworda
“It’s one thing to privately confront you about what you perceived to be a racist remark, but it’s an entirely different thing to publicly curse you out in front of patients and staff.”
“She should have reported her suspicions to HR if she had any actual evidence of racism and let them handle it. Like OP did. If you scream and holler like a banshee, that’s on you.” – Iceespicyyy
“NTA. She was grandstanding to an audience and deserved what she got.” – dataslinger
“The way you reacted and went to HR is how she should have handled it, and all would have been clarified. Her actions have consequences. Keep your head up!” – Tikipunch02
Others were certain that this incident was a preview of what it would be like to work with that nurse long-term.
“I’m not surprised HR let her go so quickly.”
“The reality is, if someone is the type of person to fly off the handle this quickly, they’re going to do it over other things as well. This was just a sign of things to come.”
“People like that create toxic work environments for everyone around them. And it’s much easier to get rid of them early, when they’re still in a probationary period than it is to get rid of them later when they’ve developed a support system of other insufferable people that will help cover/explain for them.” – Silly_Southerner
“If they reacted that intensely and unacceptably, then they weren’t meant to work in a professional setting. They were a liability.”
“Imagine if a patient did something to make them upset, and they reacted like that. They’d have been a walking lawsuit.” – Aandiarie_QueenofFa
“If she can’t handle someone being racist without going off on them and causing a scene, I’m gonna go out on a limb and say she probably shouldn’t be in the ER. Not just nice people go to hospitals, and if she can’t regulate her emotions any better than that, a high-stress area is no place for her.” – No_Gurl113
“Someone who’s not able to keep their cool under stress or manage their emotions to handle things professionally is probably not going to do well in the medical field. When I worked in it, I got called a lot of misogynistic and racist names (I’m not POC), and you just kind of have to let it slide off like rain off a duck’s back.”
“A little different than the circumstance OP described, but if she’s not going to be able to handle her emotions when people start being ugly to each other, she’s going to burn herself out from the stress or end up fighting one of the patients or their families. Being the medical professional often feels like being forced to be the only adult in the room while everyone devolves into children.”
“Not always, but it happens. NTA.” – zombiedinocorn
“She didn’t get fired for calling you a racist. She was fired for cussing up a storm and making a scene in front of patients. Hotheads have no business working in an ER, so NTA.”
“She made it clear what working with her will be like every day.” – Famous-Category-277
“NTA. The biggest issue is that she caused a scene where many people, including patients, witnessed her accusation (as you pointed out).”
“If she truly cared, she would have pulled you to the side and asked you about it.”
“I’m all for calling out racism, sexism, etc., BUT these things happen.”
“For example, I was in the break room and eating these chocolate balls (had no idea what their names are, but DELICIOUS) and I remember saying, ‘I love these balls,’ and instantly realized how it sounded. I apologized instantly.”
“My colleagues understood because they know me well. If they were uncomfortable, they’re happy to talk to me about it. (They still make fun of me for this, lol.) It happens, we apologize, and we can move on!”
“A simple apology after realizing they were wrong won’t cut it, especially since your job could be on the line.”
“What if there was a patient who heard and refused to let you treat them? Or complained?”
“What if another colleague refused to work with you? Or word got out?”
“She caused a scene.” – AVeryBrownGirlNerd
“NTA.”
“She wasn’t standing up to sh*t. She was grandstanding and virtue-signaling. Her unwillingness to listen shows that her motivation has nothing to do with what’s right or solving anything. She was only interested in making herself the hero.”
“That’s not a mindset that belongs in the ER. Main character syndrome puts lives at risk.”
“HR could see that. You did the right thing. NTA again.” – chefkel412
While some were grateful that the nurse had stepped up and spoken out on what she believed was a racist issue, they contested how she handled the situation and caused a scene in such a sensitive and hectic place as an emergency room check-in.
It made it obvious to everyone what it would be like to work with this nurse long-term whenever something came up that she didn’t agree with, as well as what she’d be willing to do to protest.
The behavior had no place in the ER while she needed to focus on the patients.