Cosplayer 'Humiliates' Ex-Boyfriend's New Girlfriend Who Insulted Her All Day At Comic Convention

After a break-up, staying friends can be difficult.

Not everyone is built for it.

But many try.

Then, meeting an ex's new partner... can be brutal.

Friendships can go sour because of it.

Redditor Impossible_League_20 wanted to discuss her experience and get some feedback, so naturally, she came to the "Am I The A**hole" (AITA) subreddit.

She asked:

"AITA for "humiliating" my ex's new girlfriend in front of our friend group?"

The Original Poster (OP) explained:

"Posting from my inactive account because I have some friends lurking in my main one."

"I (22 F[emale]) broke up with my B[oy]F[riend] (24 M[ale]) around eight months ago."

"We decided to mutually call it quits and parted in pretty good terms, which is good, because we just so happen to share a friend group."

"After a rough patch, I decided to start taking a bit more care of myself: eating better, going to the gym, and going to therapy."

"The shift was pretty evident, both in my attitude and the way I look."

"My friends said I looked much happier and healthier, and I began gaining confidence little by little."

"Now, I am a huge nerd."

"I play D[ungeons] and D[ragons] weekly, I have thousands of hours in Stellaris, and (most relevant to the story) I like to cosplay as a hobby."

"Most of my old cosplay involved characters that don't show their face or body too much (Hornet from Hollow Knight, Mono from Little Nightmares, etc), but since I'd been feeling more confident, I decided that for the big con in my city, I'd like to try something different."

"A friend convinced me to go as Viper and Chamber from Valorant, so for the past six months, we've been pouring most of our free time into the cosplays."

"Three weeks ago, I sent a picture of me wearing the cosplay to the group chat, asking for feedback for the final details."

"My ex immediately DM'd me asking me to please not wear that cosplay to the con because it might make his new G[irl]F[riend] uncomfortable."

"I asked what about it would make her uncomfortable, but he refused to elaborate."

"I knew he was dating someone new, but I didn't know she was coming with us to the con."

"I tried to explain to him that this was the work of months, and I couldn't just throw it all away just because a girl I'd never met felt uncomfortable about it."

"In the end, I wore it to the con, and it was a huge success."

"I tried to keep my distance from the larger chunk of our group because my ex and his new girl were with them, but we did spend a good part of the day with them."

"Throughout the whole thing, the new girl kept making snide comments at me and laughing whenever I got asked to pose for pictures."

"Everyone looked uncomfortable, but nobody said anything."

"After leaving the con to have dinner, though, another friend asks the new girl if she wouldn't like to try cosplay as well."

"Her answer was: 'Why would I need more attention from guys? I already have a boyfriend, I'm not a slut.'"

"I snapped and told her to stop acting like a pick me bit*h just because I got attention all day."

"She started to cry immediately."

"My ex steps in, asking me to apologize."

"I tell him I'll only do it if she apologizes for the way she's been acting around me all day."

"More and more of our friends start to join the screaming match, and it gets so bad that we end up getting kicked out of the restaurant."

"It's been five days, and my ex is threatening to leave the friend group if I don't apologize."

"I honestly wouldn't care if he did, but some of our friends are asking me to do so to stop him from leaving."

The OP was left to wonder:

"Should I cave? AITA?"

Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed in on some options to the question, AITA:

• NTA – Not The A**hole
• YTA – You're The A**hole
• NAH – No A**holes Here
• ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

Many Redditors declared that OP was NOT the A**hole.

"Are they really your friends if they stand there and let some stranger call you a sl*t?"

"Reevaluate those friendships." ~ trapcardx

"He and his ex seem far too gone to apologize, so this will probably end up with them leaving the group, which is a good riddance."

"Though if I were OP, I would be careful of some of the friends who are asking you to apologize."

"They prefer him more."

"Real friends shouldn't tolerate that level of disrespect from the girlfriend." ~ IceSeeker

"NTA. So it was perfectly okay for her to bully you all day, but the second you clap back (which anyone would do after being called a slut), she's suddenly the victim, and you have to apologize? No."

"She shouldn't give if she can't take."

"She started it."

"It's not your fault that she's so ridiculously insecure that she has to tear you down to feel better about herself."

"It's not your fault she's immature." ~ Fioreborn

"What's really funny is I can see how all of this would have played out if OP didn't take the high road for most of the day."

"At any point, if OP stood up for herself, she would have been labeled the offender, or too sensitive, or jealous, not the new bully's girlfriend." ~ Kittymemesallday

"THIS. OP, you are NTA, but anyone who does not stand up for you after you were attacked all day is."

"You behaved yourself and put up with bullying and pot shots as your so-called friends stayed silent."

"Frankly, everyone should be apologizing for letting it go on for so long." ~ NerthGord

"NTA. Sounds like, to start with, the new GF was jealous of you for whatever reason (maybe ex was noticing how you had changed)."

"In any case, ex was out of line asking you not to wear the cosplay, and new GF was being childish, sniping at you, and with the sl*t comment."

"As a matter of course, you don’t call someone a sl*t and don’t expect them not to respond."

"What you said was mild compared to what she said to you.

"Don’t cave."

"Your ex is being dramatic."

"And if you cave, you are asking to be bullied by a new GF from here on out." ~ bamf1701

"NTA. Keep in mind you are 22, and this is probably not your forever friend group."

"If they want you to go against your values to 'keep the peace,' don't."

"You're not the one in the wrong." ~ hopefoolness

"NTA. He’s the one who decided to bring a new GF around your pre-existing friend group."

"Her insecurities aren’t your problem, but she definitely made her attitude your problem."

"If he chooses to leave the friend group over it, then your response only needs to be 'don’t let the door hit you on your way out.'" ~ Glittering_Safe_8458

"NTA. First off, he didn't want you to wear the cosplay because it would make HIMSELF uncomfortable."

"Second, it's another case of 'if you can't handle the heat, stay out of the kitchen.'"

"She knew what she was doing with that comment, and I think she was only upset to gain sympathy from your ex."

"So again, NTA." ~ Cryptoidiom

"NTA - She very intentionally called you a sl*t."

"Why should you be the one to apologize?"

"Don't back down."

"Ask your friends if they really want to continue this dynamic, because your apology isn't going to change the way those two are acting."

"I wouldn't be surprised if she was acting that way because he has been talking shit about you the whole time." ~ Primus_is_OK_I_guess

"NTA. Ex is wrong, and his new girl is more wrong."

"Imagine starting a fight with your new man's friend group."

"What a dumb move."

"Ask the friends who tell you to apologize if she's right to call you a slut. She's so insecure, and if she isn't into the con stuff, she shouldn't have gone." ~ auroracorpus

"NTA. From the title of the post, I headed into this one leaning the other way because typically humiliating someone is an a**hole move - but my preconception turned out to be wrong."

"Not your fault at all that you did some work on yourself, and you're enjoying the results."

"If that upsets other people, then that's their problem - not yours." ~ Hiply

"NTA. You're not the one who started it, since everyone felt something was going on, but hasn't said anything."

"The new girlfriend not only insulted you, but indirectly all people who have cosplaying as a hobby or a passion."

"And your ex is angry at the wrong woman." ~ KogaTenebraLux

"NTA. She started it."

"She's insecure."

"Don't apologize."

"You should tell HIM what happened: that you kept your distance as much as you could, that she had been making snide comments about you, laughing nastily whenever you posed for pictures, and making everyone uncomfortable all day long."

"Tell him when she made the last nasty comment, you had had it."

"Tell him that you will not apologize because she had been insulting you ALL DAY LONG."

"She gave X number of insults to your one."

"Tell him that he shouldn't leave the friend group, because everyone likes him and because if he and she break up, he will have no friends."

"That way, you can tell your friends you told him not to leave, that everyone likes him, etc."

"It sounds like you have found yourself and everything is going wonderfully for you now (except for her, and she's just a gnat in the background)."

"Keep enjoying yourself!"

"Keep thriving!" ~ Spare_Ad5009

Reddit is 1000% with you, OP.

This is all on her and him.

Don't let them steal your shine.

You stay happy and have fun.