It always seems like a good idea to order food to share with the table when going out with friends.
Even if doing so never quite turns out exactly like everyone hopes it might.
Indeed, sometimes finding food that everyone enjoys can be surprisingly challenging.
In other cases, it turns out this food isn’t exactly shared equally.
Redditor Subject-Ad-807 recently enjoyed a meal out with some friends.
One item seemed particularly attractive to one member of the group.
Who took a portion that was a bit less than generous in the eyes of the original poster (OP).
When the OP called his friend out on this, his friend took it in with anything but stride.
Wondering if he had gone too far, the OP took to the subReddit “Am I The A**hole” (AITA), where they asked fellow Redditors:
“AITA for calling out a buddy for eating the crunchy cheese layer off the Mac & cheese?”
The OP explained how a shared serving of Macaroni and Cheese ended up creating a wedge in one of their friendships:
“Went out to a nice tapas dinner with two buddies on a golf trip.”
“We order very much with a sharing mindset.”
“People tossed out ideas of menu items, agreed to stay away from seafood due to one person having an allergic sensitivity.”
“As the food arrives, one of the items was a Mac & cheese that had a layer of crunchy melted cheese on top.”
“One dude proceeded to serve himself and took THE ENTIRE TOP LAYER of the Mac.”
“I called him out in a half joking manner like ‘yo! What you are doing, you terrorist!?! Who takes all the topping?’”
“Again, in a sarcastic joking tone but clearly sending a message.”
“He proceeded to cut half the crust off his plate and put it back in the community bowl.”
“Part two is a huge blow up argument on the golf course the next day when it got brought up.”
“Am I the a**hole for calling him out?”
Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation, by declaring:
- NTA: Not the A**hole
- YTA: You’re the A**hole
- ESH: Everybody Sucks Here
- NAH: No A**holes Here
The Reddit community was in agreement that the OP was not the a**hole for calling out their friend for taking all of the crunchy mac and cheese top for himself.
Everyone agreed that not only was the behavior of the OP’s friend thoughtless, but the crunchy top of macaroni and cheese was the best part:
“NTA, taking the entire crusty top off shared mac and cheese is like eating all the pepperoni off a shared pizza.”
“The fact that he only gave back HALF after you called him out and then had the nerve to blow up about it the next day makes him double the a**hole.”- BeginningPollution78
“NTA.”
“That’s like Cartman eating the chicken skin off every piece of fried chicken and leaving everyone else the rest.”- DenverNugs
“NTA for sure.”
“Taking all of the best part of a shared dish is such an AH move.”- Blahblah3180
“Once my friend visited me at my house, and after she left, I pulled my Chunky Monkey out of the freezer to find she had eaten EVERY CHUNK in the pint and put it back in the freezer.”
“Unforgivable.”
“NTA.”- rojo-perro
“Ma’am you can’t just take all the nachos with the toppings, it’s restaurant policy.”
“NTA btw.”- finn_diggums
“NTA.”
“That’s such a weird thing to do on a shared plate.”
“It’s like taking all the frosting off a cake.”
“Could you have let it go?”
“Maybe.”
“But what they did made it awkward.”- BlondDee1970
“NTA.”
“He put the food back because he knew he was in the wrong.”
“He blew up the next day because he was guilty and called out on it again.”- GlitchyAI
“NTA he was selfish and you called him out.”
“Glad he got the back of his hand smacked.”- BigWeinerDemeanor
“NTA.”
“Disgracing M&C like that is a pure sin!”
“BANISH THAT DEMON!”- Comfortable_Wash6179
“NTA culinary terrorism 100%.”
“I’ll hold off judgment for part 2, but there is absolutely NO universe where a fight about it is justified.”
“The Mac and cheese was like, 10 $?”
“Just order another and move on.”- RedditJustTheOnce
“NTA – Needed to have been done.”
“That’s the best part.”
“Who is he to think that he gets all of it when all of you are paying.”
“If it carried over to the next day and an actual argument came out of it, y’all need to grow up.”- slap-a-frap
“This is the correct use of terrorist.”
“NTA.”- concretism
“NTA.”
“I bet he takes the crunchy rice at the bottom of the pot too.”- violue
“NTA.”
“Don’t mess with food!”- Signal-Maize309
“NTA, the entitlement is shocking, and the fact that he put it BACK would absolutely disgust me, not gonna lie.”
“I’m good on the mac now, big dawg.”- Decent_Tea_1832
“NTA-Your friend was in the wrong.”- C1sko
“NTA, if he didn’t want to share then order your own!”- Iheartchocolate37
“NTA and I’m nosey and need part 2 IMMEDIATELY, thanks!”- SelinaRochell22
“NTA – your friend (think about this heathen for a moment) is selfish, greedy, and lame.”-Electronic_Charge_96
“NTA.”
“That’s a d*ck move.”
“I’d not invite him for dinner again.”- beepbeepboop74656
“Did he intentionally lift off all of the topping, or did it all stick on when he tried to take his portion?”
“I’m kind of assuming that he intended to do this since he kept half, instead of only keeping like a quarter (or however many people there were).”
“I will say that if I accidentally grabbed all the toppings, I’d be apologizing in advance and warning that I’m putting the excess back on, so other people could wait before grabbing more, so if it was an accident, his inaction left him looking poor.”
“If he did intend to take all the topping, you’re NTA for calling that out.”- Convenient-Enemy-511
“NTA.”
“I once had a roommate who took all the glaze off a ham I made.”
“I guess compliments to me for making a great glaze, but damn dud,e I literally had one piece before he ravaged it in the middle of the night.”- bathroomstallghost
“What happened on the golf course the next day?”
“Did he bring it up?”
“If so, it sounds like it really bothered him, but that’s not your job to make him feel okay about being called out for being selfish.”
“I would say NTA probably.”
“His offense was mild, but it was selfish, and honestly, some people should be shamed.”- Sorkijan
“How quickly did you call him out?”
“He may not have done it intentionally, and might have put back part of the crust without being called out.”
“If it was completely intentional (and it sounds like it was), then you’re NTA.”-
There were a select few, however, who wondered if the OP needed to call their friend out as they did, even if that still didn’t excuse the behavior of the OP’s friend:
“ESH.”
“It’s very rude to take the best part of the mac and cheese.”
“If it was intentional.”
“Sometimes it does just all come off though, but most people try to cut it then.”
“When you’re all sharing it.”
“But it’s also just weird to call it out in front of everyone like that.”
“That would be so embarrassing to many people.”
“But you’re really having blow-up arguments on a golf course over Mac and cheese?”
“As adults?”
“Come on.”- SnooChipmunks770
“ESH.”
“If he did it intentionally, that’s just a weird thing to do socially.”
“I think there’s a general social compact in sharing situation that you make sure everyone gets some.”
“Like if we have four people and an order of 4 mozzarella sticks, you wouldn’t take 2.”
“That being said, there’s a difference between kindly needling him about it for humor, and using that as a front for actually taking issue with it, which is passive aggressive.”
“You either let it go, because yes it was weird and he’s at fault but overall it’s not a hill on which to perish, or speak your truth.”
“But doing the joking/not joking thing is worse.”
“Pick your battles.”
“Order another damn serving.”- zealot_ratio
With the curiosity of the Reddit community piqued, the OP later disclosed just exactly how the OP’s friend reacted on the golf course the following day:
“I brought it up on the golf course as a total joke, not in any way mean or condescending.”
“It was the prompt for a blow-up that was going to happen regardless.”
“He and I clearly had some issues and this was the straw, in hindsight sight.”
‘Great news- after we started shouting at each other, I played lights out!”
It’s surprising, to say the least, that the OP’s friend didn’t think anyone would notice how he took all of the crunchy mac and cheese top for himself.
Or that it didn’t occur to him that others might want it as well.
Even so, based on this friend’s behavior on the golf course the following day, it seems that the tension between the OP and this particular friend has to do with a lot more than macaroni and cheese.
Here’s hoping they both figure out exactly what that is.