No two people feel the same way about public displays of affection, more commonly known as PDA.
Some people have no qualms about being affectionate with their partner out in public, or find it sweet to see couples showing their love.
Others are uncomfortable kissing, hugging, even holding hands while out in public, and are equally uncomfortable when others do so as well.
More often than not, people in the latter category also have no trouble making their discomfort known.
Redditor Saltlakecity126 and his girlfriend recently spent a weekend with his family, including his stepbrother and his stepbrother’s girlfriend.
During this stay, the original poster (OP) gave his fiancée one of his trademark signs of affection.
Much to his surprise, the OP’s stepbrother confronted him for doing so.
After the OP’s stepmother also demanded he apologize to his stepbrother, the OP took to the subReddit “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) where he asked fellow Redditors:
“AITA for giving my fiancée a forehead kiss?”
The OP explained how what he thought was a simple sign of affection ended up sending his stepbrother into a tirade:
“My (24 M[ale]) fiancé (28 F[emale]) and I are getting married later this month.”
“My dad had us over today, and we stayed late.”
“My stepbrother (25 M) had his girlfriend(25 F) over.”
“The 6 of us were watching movies, it was getting late, and my fiancée fell asleep.”
“She woke up around an hour later, and I gave her a forehead kiss.”
“That’s become a bit of a thing for us.”
“I always give her a forehead kiss when we wake up in the morning.”
“I also do it when she wakes up from naps.”
“It’s to the point that it’s a habit now.”
“A little while later, my stepbrother pulled me aside and demanded I stop forcing my perfect relationship down his throat.”
“I told him I wasn’t forcing anything, I was just kissing my fiancée, and he cut me off and called me a d*ck, then went upstairs.”
“The rest of the night went pretty normal.”
“My stepbrother’s girlfriend went upstairs to look for my stepbrother after a while.”
“My fiancée and I just got home, and I received a text from my stepmom.”
“It said that I should apologize for making my stepbrother uncomfortable and stop acting so obsessed with my fiancée.”
“AITA for giving my fiancée a forehead kiss?”
Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation, by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
The Reddit community unanimously agreed that the OP was not the a**hole for kissing his fiancée on the forehead.
Everyone agreed that the reaction of the OP’s stepbrother clearly stemmed from insecurities regarding his own relationship, with others feeling that the fact that he complained to his mother about this only further illuminates his immaturity:
“NTA.”
“I’m guessing your brother’s gf was like ‘Why can’t you be nice and sweet to me the way OP is with his fiancee?'”
“And he got pissed at you instead of just stepping up his game.”- SoMuchMoreEagle
“NTA.”
“I can’t believe your stepbrother went crying to his mommy about it.”- lmchatterbox
“Oof.”
“Imagine going over to your partner’s house to watch a movie and your partner – upon seeing a form of PDA so chaste we regularly use it with children – flips his absolute sh*t because he’s jealous of bro’s ‘perfect relationship’ and then storms off.”
“Imagine what its like to be that girl.”
“NTA.”
“Maybe make sure you two have a good line of communication with the gf, she may need some support.”
“Congrats on the wedding.”- Kitastrophe8503
“It was a forehead kiss, not 69.”
“Sounds like your stepbrother is mad that you have a better relationship than he does.”
“Then he goes and whines to his mommy.”
“You are absolutely NTA.”- Sufficient-Excuse445
“NTA.”
“Why is he forcing his imperfect relationship down your throat?”
“It wasn’t crazy PDA, he could’ve ignored it.”- SquigglySquabble
“So they’re mad at you for loving your fiancé and showing her affection?”
“Okay then.”
“I think you should know that you’re clearly NTA here.”- streetsstaywatchin
“NTA and no apology necessary.”
“Seriously, demanding an apology from you when HE was acting like a toddler!?!”
“Laugh it off and tell stepmom you intend to be ‘obsessed’ with your soon-to-be wife for the rest of your life.”- SuddenEquivalent6318
“I think he wanted a forehead kiss too OP.”
“NTA.”- Capital_Network4032
“NTA.”
“Tell your stepbrother to mind his own business!”- harleybidness
“NTA.”
“Your 25-year-old brother needs to grow up.”- DifficultSwim
“NTA.”
“A forehead kiss is way too mild a PDA to warrant this kind of reaction.”
“He’s definitely got something against you, or he’s insecure about something.”- Perfect_Order7461
“NTA.”
“I think stepbrother is having some GF troubles.”
“Maybe she’s mentioned his lack of affection ,and you doing it so easily makes him feel like he has to compete.”
“Anyways.”
“He’s an a**hole.”
“Don’t stress about it.”- Cesarlikethesalad
“This is a perfect example of why your brother only has a girlfriend instead of a fiancée and soon-to-be wife like you.”
“Because he’s far too focused on your relationship than on his own.”
“His insecurities or lack of affection towards his girlfriend are definitely not your problem.”
“Focus on your relationship and keep doing what works for both of you; no one else’s opinions matter.”
“NTA.”- Omxmm
“NTA.”
“Step-bro has a thing for your fiancée, though.”- Competitive_Tale_799
“NTA.”
“Just because your step-brother is insecure in his relationship doesn’t mean you have to stop living well in your relationship.”- Trick-Stranger-2811
“NTA.”
“I would guess that his relationship is currently having problems, and instead of working on that, he is taking it out on you.”- BlueRFR3100
“My money is on step bro is catching heat from his GF over his lack of affection/way he treats her/why aren’t they engaged yet, and instead of dealing with it like an adult and communicating with his partner, he lashed out at you because that sort of aggression is easier.”
“I’ve no formal psychiatric training, but if anyone else would like me to analyze their situations, across the internet with the barest of context, my hourly rate is very reasonable.”
“NTA.”- Roadhouse1337
“NTA.”
“Keep showing those nice little moments of intimacy.”
“Those are the ones that your fiancée probably loves most, especially since they have become a habit for you.”
“Sounds like your stepbrother needs to step up his game.”
“I’m sure his girlfriend thought it was cute and would like the same.”
“He’s jealous and so incredibly whiny.”
“Did this 25-year-old man really go to his mommy?”
“Over a forehead kiss?”
“He also left his girlfriend to go pout?”
“Embarrassing.”- ClaireL58
“You’re NTA.”
“Jealousy is not a great look.”
“And even if you were inclined to comply, it would not make his relationship any better.”
“Stepmom needs to butt out.”
“You all are too old for her to try to settle conflicts.”
“And he is way too old to be crying to Mommy when his wittle feelings get wounded.”-
Dittoheadforever
“NTA.”
“Is he jealous of your affection or something?”
“Weird.”- glitterolives
“NTA & no apology necessary.”
“He can kiss his gf on the forehead if he wants, but if he’s upset about comparing his relationship to yours that’s his problem.”- BlueyIsAwesome
“NTA.”
“Your brother’s jealousy isn’t your problem.”- Vesper2000
“NTA.”
“And not responsible for his childish insecurities, and of course, the step mom is going to stand up for her precious baby boy.”
“But that’s all he is, a baby who realizes that he’s just not on the same level of being a good and loving partner like you.”
“Just ignore it and keep going about your business.”
“You do not need to apologize for being a good man to your fiancé, screw that muppet.”-
Strict-History-3802
“NTA and don’t apologize.”
“I can’t believe showing such mild pda set someone off, and I find it even weirder that step-mom texted you about it.”- SnooPineapples280
“Lmao, your brother’s got a bad relationship.”
“NTA.”- holderofthebees
“NTA.”
“Keep demonstrating what a healthy relationship is.”
“Maybe his girlfriend will dump him and he’ll learn how to behave better.”- overZealousAzalea
“NTA.”
“Forehead kisses are a wonderful thing even between friends and family.”
“He just a butt.”
“Also if he isn’t the golden child, he told your mom a different story.”- Mabunnie
“Is this a joke?”
“NTA.”
“You don’t have to hide the fact that you like your fiancée.”- ScarletNotThatOne
It’s pretty hard to imagine how the OP’s stepbrother felt the OP was “forcing [his] perfect relationship down his throat” by a simple kiss on the forehead.
You can’t help but agree that this stemmed from feeling uncomfortable in his own relationship.
Even if the OP clearly didn’t do anything wrong, he could still suck it up and apologize if his stepbrother was truly upset by this little kiss.
Based on his stepbrother’s reaction, however, it’s hard to think that his stepbrother will react rationally to this apology either.