Parents send their kids to school everyday hoping it’s enjoyable from start to finish.
Although hiccups and infractions are unavoidable, students for the most part should look forward to every part of the day, from morning meetings to snack time to reading, writing and recess.
There are on occasion, however, a select student or two (and their parents) who make it a little difficult.
One parent on Reddit, in fact, refuses to cater to the “dietary restrictions” of one student (at the demand of her parens) in their son’s class so that the rest of the class can enjoy a nice snack, so they turned to the “Am I The A**hole Here” (AITAH) subReddit to seek feedback from fellow Redditors.
Redditor GoDavyGo asked:
“AITA for refusing to cater to one student’s dietary restrictions when bringing snacks for my son’s 3rd-grade class?”
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
“My son’s in the 3rd grade, and his teacher asked if parents could help by bringing snacks throughout the year.”
“Lunch is later in the day this year, so these snacks help tide the kids over.”
“It’s all voluntary, and the only request was to avoid peanuts.”
“I’ve contributed a variety of snacks so far: Cheez-Its, beef jerky, fig bars, and Ritz crackers.”
“My son mentioned that one girl in the class didn’t like any of the snacks I brought.”
“I didn’t think much of it at the time.”
“This week, I brought madeleines and apple sauce pouches.”
“My son came home saying that this girl is now claiming allergies, being gluten-free, avoiding meat, and having a bunch of other dietary restrictions.”
“I told my son, ‘If her dietary needs are so strict, maybe her parents should be the ones responsible for her snacks.'”
“Being the good-natured kid he is, he mentioned this to both the girl and the teacher, which got back to her parents, who then complained to the school.”
“The teacher, who has always been grateful for my contributions, is now in a tough spot and gently asked if I could bring snacks that fit this student’s restrictions.”
“Based on what I’ve heard, this girl’s ‘approved’ snack list is basically saltine crackers, butter noodles, and fruit snacks.”
“To me, this seems more like a case of pickiness than medical necessity.”
“I told the teacher I understood her situation and that I’d love to keep helping with snacks, but I’d like to continue to bring the type of snacks I’ve been supplying and if one student can’t partake, it should be up to that student’s parents to provide for her.”
“My wife thinks I’m being an a**hole for putting the teacher in a tough spot.”
“I just want to keep bringing snacks that the rest of the kids enjoy.”
“AITA?”
Redditors weighed in and decided OP is not the a**hole.
“NTA.”
“With that kind of a restrictive diet, her parents should supply her snacks.” – MothraDidIt
“NTA.”
“If these were real food allergies, the parents would have told the school about them at the beginning of the school year.”
“I think that the student is a picky eater, and her parents need to supply her snacks if she needs special food.” – KatFrog
“NTA.”
“The exception should not make the rule” – PatentlyRidiculous
“Get a nice big box of saltines and send it JUST FOR HER.”
“Make sure to then bring in something cool, like fresh chocolate chip cookies.”
“See how long she sticks to juts crackers.”
“NTA” – HMS_Slartibartfast
“NTA. But instead of making this a ‘I’m not doing that” situation, reframe it.'”
“‘Since her diet is restrictive, I don’t feel I am qualified to choose snacks for her.'”
“‘I certainly don’t want the liability if I make a mistake.'” – rusty0123
“As a parent with a peanut allergy, we never expected another parent to cater to his allergy.”
“We always sent in box of safe snacks every few weeks.”
“This child is probably lying about all these food restrictions, she being picky.”
“Keep doing what you’ve been doing, unless the teacher says not too, then bow out and let the child’s mother step up.” – ncjr591
“Just send in a box of saltine crackers and get on with your life.”
“You’re NTA so far but obsess any more and you will be.” – Grand_Measurement_91
“Plus saltines and noodles aren’t typically gluten free.”
“I call b.s. on allergies.”
“NTA at all, these parents are teaching entitlement” – Simple-City1598
“Nta.”
“The school and teacher and other kid’s parents should be understanding of the fact that the child’s diet is extremely limited.”
“To provide a snack that is tasty and nutritious while meeting that child’s dietary restrictions would be extremely costly.”
“I’m sure her parents know that.”
“I would just put my foot down and say that you don’t mind to get her a pack of her own saltines (or cheap snack that meets her needs) on days you send in a class snack, but you will not be providing an expensive snack to every student in the classroom in order to avoid her dietary restrictions, if her parents feel this is inadequate then they should provide their own child with a daily snack (and state that you understand completely if that family never provides a class snack so long as they provide a snack for their own child daily).” – After_Fee4860
“First Grade Classroom Teacher here – THANK YOU for generously donating snacks to your son’s class.”
“I’m sure the children, and the teacher, are very grateful.”
“I would clarify with the teacher what the true restrictions are, since you said it is based on what you heard.”
“Regardless, you may decide to generously donate something she likes, and ask the teacher to hold it to the side just for her.”
“This is a little kid, AND, she may be a really picky eater, AND maybe her parents don’t give her a snack (which breaks my heart).”
“I have had picky eaters that could deal with going without a snack and some that couldn’t.”
“You certainly are NTA!” – TeachPeaceToAll
“NTA.”
“If students have severe dietary requirements, it’s standard for their parents to provide the teacher with a stash of safe snacks.”
“You can’t expect random parents to flawlessly navigate significant medical needs.”
“It’s not just unreasonable, it’s unsafe as hell.”
“Explain to the teacher that you won’t be able to accommodate the child’s requirements for everyone’s safety.”
“You KNOW the parents would sue if she got sick.”
“The school will have a policy to deal with this.” – Safe_Ad_7777
“Nta”
“Needing a special diet is one thing… wanting is another.”
“Your snacks are fine.”
“She’s just ridiculously picky.” – emryldmyst
“Can the school argue with this logic?”
“’The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few’ – Spock, ‘The Wrath of Khan'”
“(NTA, and you should also just remove yourself from the snack contribution list since it’s voluntary)” – Prize_Sorbet3366
“Ex teacher here. I taught for 34 years.”
“This is not your responsibility.”
“You’re bringing snacks for the entire class that’s wonderful of you.”
“If the kids got an allergy unfortunately it’s up to their parents to deal with it, with the exception of peanut allergies.” – chtmarc
“I have a severe dairy allergy (anaphylaxis severe, not just stomach problems).”
“My teachers always told my mom when there were going to be snacks, birthdays, special food events, etc, and she would make sure to send in a dairy free version for me.”
“It is the parent’s responsibility to provide for their own child, not the teacher’s responsibility nor any other parent’s.”
“NTA” – mr_iguano_man
“NTA The parents of said child should send snacks along just for her.”
“Be weird though if it were saltines or noodles as uh, there’s gluten in those and gelatin in fruit snacks.”
“People like this give those of us with real allergy and restrictions a bad name and it sucks.” – ActuaryMean6433
“NTA. I was (still am) super picky.”
“If I didn’t like something, I just didn’t eat it.”
“I also never complained unless someone tried to force me to eat it.”
“If she wants a snack and she’s that restrictive, her parents should provide her a snack.”
“Like what kid hates cheeze-its? lol.”
“Also beef jerky is a really good snack idea!” – RoxyBenderLoki21
“As someone who dabbled in teaching many moons ago this is NOT a tough situation for the school nor teacher.”
“This teacher just needs a spine is all, it’s a purely voluntary activity, if they don’t want to take part nobody is forcing them.”
“NTA.” – Gr_ywind
“NTA. Send your kid with snacks for just them and be done with it.”
“Pop off an email to the teacher with something like….”
“‘Dear Teacher,'”
“‘Moving forward, I will no longer provide class snacks. I will however send my child with a snack for their personal consumption.'”
“‘They know it’s in their bag and they know they are allowed to eat it during snack time, even if anyone else doesn’t have a snack.'”
“‘This message has also been CC’d to administrators and I expect you will respect this change effective immediately.'”
“‘Thank you, Parent'”
“That’s it. No drama.
“What’s done is done and don’t bother to volunteer snacks in future years of schooling.”
“It’s honestly not worth the stress. 🤷🏼♀️” – lilhope03
“NTA, and tell your wife that the real a**holes are the kid and her entitled parents expecting everyone to cater to her.”
“I wouldn’t bring snacks any more rather than capitulate to such nonsense.” – RetreadRoadRocket
It definitely sounds like other Redditors are on OP’s side.
This parent does, however, need to make a decision and communicate it to the teacher.