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Redditor Accused Of ‘Bad Manners’ After Leaving Interview When They Wouldn’t Disclose Salary

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People say there is a fine line between sticking up for yourself and towing the line when it comes to the job search.

All the rules of how to conduct yourself when interviewing seem to change.

And it always come down to money.

When is the best time to ask?

Case in point…

Redditor AnxiousSprinkles396 wanted to discuss their story for some feedback. So naturally they came to visit the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit.

They asked:

“AITA for walking out of an interview when they would not disclose a salary to me?”

The Original Poster (OP) explained:

“I’m getting mixed messages about this and a variety of opinions.”

“Last year, I graduated with my degree in computer science.”

“Since then, I worked on contract for a company that has been fairly ok, but not one I plan to try and start a career with.”

“Since my contract ends in a month I’ve been looking for full time work.”

“The hardest part about this though is fitting all the interviews in.”

“Basically every application I send in gets responded too, along with a handful of recruiters spamming my LinkedIn.”

“So, I’ve decided that if they do not tell me in the first 15 minutes of the interview what they are actually paying I will ask.”

“If they don’t tell me in a plain terms (an actual range or a number) I will thank them for their time and leave.”

“Most of the people I’ve talked too will just answer the question, but I’ve noticed a few try to dance around it.”

“They reply with ‘money isn’t the most important part of a job,’ or some ‘we’re family and salary isn’t important’ bulls**t.”

“Because of this, out of about a dozen interviews I’ve walked from 4 this way.”

“To at least justify this, I’m already in talks with a company.”

“And basically waiting to hear their offer so I feel like if they are not going to give me a guess of what I could expect at this point there’s not reason for me to deal with them.”

“Well, yesterday evening I went to meet up with a local startup.”

“A recruiter reached out to me and I fit every chackbox they needed.”

“And had actually built a compiler for the language they were primarily using (python) so I was their number one candidate.”

“15 minutes in they had not talked at all about compensation so I asked.”

“The interviewer told me that ‘it’s bad mannered to ask for a salary this early in the process.'”

“I just smiled and said that I disagree and that I was not going to waste my time entertaining an offer if they could not compete.”

“He tried to argue back that they were a startup and yada yada so I just did what I did before.”

“Stood up, thanked him for his time, and left.”

“Well, the recruiter blew up my phone asking what the f**k I did and who I thought I was?”

“Apparently the owner of the company was my interviewer (I had no clue, first time I talked to the guy and he never even mentioned he was the owner,) and he blew up at the recruiter for my behavior.”

“The recruiter made a vague post on LinkedIn that was an attack against me but didn’t name me.”

“The comments swing from I’m in the right to a total a**hole.”

“I told my S[ignificant] O[ther] and they said that I was an a**hole.”

“So, AITA?”

Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed some options to the question AITA?:

  • NTA – Not The A**hole
  • YTA – You’re The A**hole
  • NAH – No A**holes Here
  • ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

Redditors declared our OP was NOT the A**hole.

It’s a tricky situation.

Let’s hear some thoughts…

“NTA – It’s bad manners to not tell people what they’ll be making.”

“Since money is the primary reason people have jobs in the first place.”

“Anyone who pretends otherwise is bullshi**ing.”

“Saying stuff like ‘we’re family here’ is for me an indicator that a company is actively trying to get away with some shady stuff like paying people as little as possible.”

“Not paying extra hours, and getting mad when people call in sick.”  ~ DensityOfThought

“NTA. They could’ve just told you what the salary is.”

“They totally f**king know how much budget they have.”

“They’re choosing not to because they don’t want to pay you more than the smallest amount they can get away with.”

“Like, sorry to the recruiter for getting backlash for what is a f**king reasonable action of just asking for information.”

“But also f**k that recruiter for blowing up at you.”

“If you ticked every box they had, they should have been able to just say the freaking number.”

“You weren’t even being an a**hole.”

“You disagreed politely, you made your point, you left.”

“You made the owner feel small, but maybe… he should be able to just say the damn salary band?”

“Anyway, companies that pretend they’re family are often bull.”

“Work is still work. Even if it’s enjoyable.”

“You dodged a bullet.”

“Edit: lol at anyone whose like ‘but they could be nicer about it to the interviewer.'”

“In a job interview, both the company and the person is being interviewed, it’s not a one way street.”

“Culture fit is highly important and if OP already sees that the company is not a culture fit for them, it’s their right to stop the interview.”

“The company would do the same.”

“The interviewer failed the vibe check.”

“Why would OP continue if they’re just going to say no to whatever offer?”

“It’s also means less time wasted on everyone’s part.”

“Like, being ghosted by companies happens all the freaking time because they don’t feel like responding to you is worth their time and effort.”

“That’s more rude and disrespectful.”

“I’d rather get a quick ‘no’ and I can continue with my day.”

“Clearly, so does OP.”  ~ petrichorInk

“NTA. Why is the company’s time more important than yours?”

“It would also be in their best interest for both you and them to be on the same page regarding salary early in the process.”

“And the recruiter should have given you a ballpark number as he knows in general terms the salary range for the position.”

“Also, any company that tries to play the ‘We are all one big family’ line is going to be dysfunctional beyond belief and cause all sorts of personal boundary issues.”  ~ Strixtheowl

“The recruiter is mad he got called out now is just shoveling drama downstream to you.”

“I once had a recruiter encourage me to ask for 90k.”

“This was a salaried job that included being on call 24/7 for one week each month.”

“Base pay would have been closer to 75 k with 1.5x hourly paid out for OT/ on call at a comparable company.”

“I wanted to make sure I was getting paid fairly for that extra 12 weeks a year on call.”

“Anyway during the first round interview one of the guys said we would talk salary at the second round.”

“But I could tell he was going to push back on my number, so I didn’t bother pursuing the job.”

“If the owner is present, I see no reason why a discussion of salary can’t happen at any time.”

“Traditionally it’s considered polite to discuss nuts and bolts at the end of the interview and may be a generational thing too.”

“People are actually pretty bad at hiring others because of innate biases like this.”

“You were the best candidate but he thought you were rude for not waiting until the end of the interview to discuss compensation.”

“That’s my read. Recruiter is just a nothing, ignore him.” ~ multiversalmind

“NTA! Why why why why why is our culture so obsessed with not talking about money?!”

“You wouldn’t hire a plumber without knowing what they charge.”

“You wouldn’t buy a car without knowing what it costs.”

“You wouldn’t spend HOURS scoping out a house without it being in your price range.”

“When I worked with a recruiter… ‘What’s the compensation/salary/hourly look like for this position?'”

“If they didn’t answer I wouldn’t waste another minute of my time on that.”

“I’d say, ‘once you have an idea of the compensation we can move forward talking about this position. Otherwise, let’s move on.'”  ~ Gullible-Mine8214

“NTA. And blowing up your phone is insane.”

“By asking for salary you revealed a major culture issue in that company.”

“Also, are you working with a recruiter to find you these positions?”

“If so ditch the loser.”

“You’re too valuable to be treated like this and the IT market is still hot.”  ~ halfStackScratchDev

“NTA – owner was flabbergasted you had the gall to call his bluff.”

“Dude was 100% going to try to sell you on stock options that don’t exist yet.”

“My (large) company gave up and has salary bands on all postings now.”

“They have a long way to go before being a GREAT employer, and even they are upfront about salary band.”  ~ aleeseeahforyou

“I am a Human Resources manager and I ask what their salary requirements are during an interview and I am honest if we can fit that are not.”

“All of our jobs are at a set starting rate.”

“I disclose that immediately.”

“Salary is one of the biggest reasons why people take a job.”

“It is insulting to offer someone much less than they were making.”

“If they cannot be honest about that, then avoid them.”

“I would also suggest if they do not have a scale for raises- do not expect them!”

“No one is working for fun- everyone is there for the money. NTA.”  ~ crazycatlady45325

Reddit is with you OP.

A job is about money.

If people want to give of their time to charity, they will, to charities.

Good luck on the job search.