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Mom Kicked Out Of Son’s Wedding For Posting Picture Of Bride To Social Media Before Ceremony

Photo by Kinga Cichewicz/Unsplash

Your wedding day is meant to be one of the happiest of your life.

Both bride and groom or bride and bride or groom and groom… however one identifies… should be on cloud nine.

But sometimes there always seems to be a friend or relative lurking about, trying to steal the thunder.

Case in point…

Redditor WeddingDressBlue wanted to discuss his story for some feedback. So naturally he came to visit the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit.

He asked:

“AITA for going kicking my mom out of my wedding reception?”

The Original Poster (OP) explained:

“My mom is a social media whore and has to post everything.”

“My wife had one request about her wedding.”

“Other than the bridal party no one was to see the wedding dress.”

“My mom kept trying to get my wife to post it for her friends on Facebook because she said everyone wanted her to do it.”

“She was mad that she didn’t even get to post pictures of my wife trying on a different wedding dress and at least allow her to post the rejects.”

“My wife said no and my mom was pissed.”

“Later when the mom’s and bridesmaids picked out their dresses my mom insisted on wearing white so my wife said F this and put the whole wedding party in white.”

“Including the mothers and grandmothers.”

“The day of the wedding my mom took a candid shot of my wife getting her veil ready and posted it about 30 minutes before the wedding started.”

“Tagging everyone in it.”

“Including the father of the bride (my F[ather] I[n] L[aw]).”

“My wife wanted to surprise him just as much as me getting the first look of her dress while he walked her down the aisle.”

“She even had the two photographers posted so they could get shots of the first look.”

“Obviously this was important to my wife.”

“Her dad saw himself tagged in the photo so instead he saw his daughter on Facebook.”

“My wife didn’t find out until after the ceremony because last minute preparation.”

“After the ceremony I kicked my mom out of the wedding and she wasn’t invited to the reception.”

“My younger sister and my dad also left, along with a few family members.”

“My brother and I covered for the mother of the groom dance by leading an impromptu chicken dance to lighten the mood.”

“The dj was super awesome and filled in the spaces with fun songs so at least the reception wasn’t a total bummer.”

“I really don’t even want my mom in my life now because what she did was petty and selfish.”

“She pulled well maybe my FIL shouldn’t have had his phone on him and my wife shouldn’t have been such a stuck up diva about her dress.”

“I have no interest in continuing a relationship with my mom at this point.”

“My dad thinks I should put this behind me because it’s ‘typical women drama’ but I told him it wasn’t and mom’s just a petty and what she does is not normal at all.”

“AITA?”

Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed some options to the question AITA?:

  • NTA – Not The A**hole
  • YTA – You’re The A**hole
  • NAH – No A**holes Here
  • ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

Redditors declared our OP was NOT the A**hole.

It’s a tricky situation.

Let’s hear some thoughts…

“If she was happy with the all-white dresses then that’s great.”

“It’s also not really the point.”

“The point is that OP’s mom was being a spiteful a**hole and she should have been dealt with sooner rather than forcing his fiancé to have to adjust on the fly to her crappy M[other] I[n] L[aw]’s narcissism.”  ~ ElizaThornberry4

“This will not work for everyone, but Mr. 99 and I simply had a no one‘s invited ceremony at the house and went out to dinner.”

There were people I would have loved to be present but I knew if I invited anyone and it got back to a certain family member there would be hell to pay.”

“When she found out we’d married without her she was angry but I know if she’d later learned my best friend was invited and not her it would have been ugly.”

“20 years later, no regrets.”

“Kudos to the op for being willing to stand up for his bride.”

“It sounds like his mother wants to be the bride at every wedding and the corpse at every funeral.”  ~ TheBella1999

“I will say I’ve seen an all white dresses wedding and it was just stunning.”

“She popped in color.”

“I hope for the wife’s sake she had that!”

“I loved her energy of ‘eff it you’re all in white.'”

“It’s hard to ask your partner to cut family.”

“I’m just proud OP put his foot down and is cutting out toxicity now.” ~ Smeli_meli2

“NTA yet I agree with you.”

“It’s very hard for people to see their loved ones, partially parents, as people.”

“We still want to see them for the person we wish they were.”

“Takes a long time to rip those rose-colored glasses off.”

“I did so as a teenager and it really did help.”

“OP didn’t want to believe his mom was this self-centered and how enabled she’s been.”

“Here’s hoping the ugly lesson sticks.”  ~ BendingCollegeGrad

“NTA. I would have told her if she wore white, she won’t make it into the ceremony or reception.”

“Same with photos. That’s a super reasonable request.”

“That said, since it went down this way, I’d start being preventative now with a good old info diet and plan for a hell of a fight if you intend to have kids in the future.”

“Maybe visit r/justnomil for some tips.” ~ SuspiciousMallow

“NTA. Your mom insisted on wearing white to a western wedding.”

“Ask yourself, why is that?”

“Everyone knows ONLY the bride is allowed to wear white.”

“So what was your mom trying to accomplish?”

“Is she jealous of your wife and couldn’t stand her being the center of attention?”

“Did your mom just want the attention on her in general?”

“And then she disrespected the bride’s biggest wish for her wedding day, and isn’t even sorry.”

“Your dad is completely wrong.”

“Your mom doesn’t even like your wife and isn’t afraid to show it.”

“The petty slights and jabs are apparent all over.”

“Good on you for standing up for your wife.”

“Don’t back down over this.”

“Your mom tried to sabotage one of the most important days of your wife’s life (and yours obviously).”  ~ RissaRay113

“OP, read the ‘rock the boat’ essay.”

“Your mother loves to stand up and rock the boat.”

“Your dad and family keep stabilizing the boat, and saying ‘that’s just how she is.'”

“Everybody is invested in allowing her to do what she wants, because of how she acts when she’s thwarted.”

“Good for you. Stand up for you and your wife.”

‘And every time your dad or family say ‘hey, just do this or that, because you know how mom is.'”

“Your response should be ‘well this is just who I am. I’m not putting up with this bad behavior by mom, and we are doing X.'”

“Going no contact, refusing to visit, requiring a proper apology, deleting photos, refusing to provide personal information, whatever.”

“Good job, stay strong and don’t give in!!”   ~ where_are_the_bats

‘Your wife is awesome – ‘F this and put the whole wedding party in white’ is glorious.”

“You are awesome for having her happiness as your first priority, and for showing her that.”

“Your mother was, sad to say, very silly for not accepting that it was you and your wife’s wedding, not her personal Facebook karma event.”

Y”our brother is awesome for the chicken dance. :)”

“NTA.”

“Until your mother is willing to offer a sincere apology for her behaviour, I think you’re quite right – you don’t need that sort of behaviour in your lives.”

“Have a fantastic married life!”  ~ ieya404

“I can only imagine this isn’t an isolated incident.”

“Your wife’s requests were totally reasonable.”

“And you did an amazing job of establishing right away that if your mom makes you choose between her or your wife, you are supporting your wife.”

“NTA. Also, congrats!”  ~ Classic_Special7045

“NTA, but this sounds like only the proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back .”

“And there seems to be a history between your mum and you or you probably wouldn’t be ready to go full no contact over a facebook post.”

“Even a sh**ty and selfish one like this.”  ~ TheCrazyCatGentleman

“NTA and neither was your wife.”

“Your mother, on the other hand, is a giant one.”

“She tried very hard to make this all about her and succeeded to a small degree.”

“Not one of her friends would have been disappointed to see pictures of the bride AFTER the ceremony, the fact that she insisted on breaking this boundary.”

“Thank you for supporting your wife in this, it bodes well for your marriage.”

“I find it hard to believe that this was the first time your mother behaved this way.”

“I suggest that you check out the subreddit raisedbynarcissists.”

“Because it certainly sounds like your mom is one and your father is her enabler.”

“Congratulations on your marriage.”  ~ unionmom4

Well OP sounds like Reddit is in agreement that you did what was necessary.

It’s unfortunate but it was your day.

Going forward, hopefully everyone can find some peace in this situation.