Betrayal comes in many shapes and forms.
Some betrayals can be vicious and painful. Others are just petty and mean-spirited.
No matter the level of wrongdoing, mutual trust is almost always ruined.
And acts of betrayal carry consequences.
Redditor IntrepidHunter5993 wanted to discuss his experience and get feedback, so he naturally joined the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subreddit.
He asked:
“AITA for reporting my friend to the university after he cheated using my notes?”
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
“I (22 M[ale]) am in med school and have this friend, let’s call him Jake.”
“We’ve studied together a few times, and I shared my annotated notes with him before a big exam.”
“I made them myself, with diagrams, explanations, and even some mnemonics I came up with.”
“A few weeks later, one of our professors used one of my made-up mnemonics in a lecture, crediting ‘an anonymous student.’”
“I was confused.”
“Turns out Jake had submitted my notes (with his name on them) to the professor’s ‘student tips’ portal, where students can share study tips for extra credit.”
“He didn’t even mention me.”
“I confronted him, he brushed it off and said, ‘It’s just notes, chill.’”
“So I reported it to the academic honesty office since it technically falls under plagiarism.”
“Now he’s under investigation and might lose the extra credit — or worse.”
“Our mutual friends are calling me petty and saying I could’ve just talked to him.”
The OP was left to wonder:
“AITA?”
Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed some options to the question AITA:
NTA – Not The A**hole
YTA – You’re The A**hole
NAH – No A**holes Here
ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Many Redditors declared OP was NOT the a**hole.
“NTA. Also, he’s not your friend.”
“Neither are any of the As that are telling you that you were in the wrong.” ~ DAWO95
“NTA. To the friends who say ‘You should have just talked to him’–You DID talk to him, and he blew you off.”
“Plagiarism is serious, at many schools, it can lead to expulsion.”
“He brought this on himself.” ~ MarionberryPlus8474
“Also if OP had also submitted their notes to the same system for extra credit under their name, they could’ve been the ones under investigation for plagiarism since the professor could’ve assumed they were the ones copying.”
“OP’s friend likely didn’t know for sure that OP wouldn’t decide to submit them.” ~ notaverage256
“NTA. I’m sure he’s shocked that he has negative consequences for using you and then treating you like crap.”
“He made his bed… now he gets to lay in it.” ~ IamIrene
“NTA, he should’ve thought about the consequences before doing that.”
“Also MED SCHOOL???”
“I wouldn’t want someone like that to be my doctor. It’s better he gets the consequences now rather than later when he misdiagnoses someone and causes their death.” ~ ARandomStudentHere
“You allowed him to use your notes as reference.”
“He straight up copied it and claimed it as his own, stealing credit that rightfully belonged to you.”
“NTA. He could’ve rephrased it or shared credit but instead stole it for himself.”
“Then he claims it’s ‘just notes.'”
“Yeah! Your notes.”
“If it’s just notes, then why steal it?” ~ sithmaster297
“NTA. You DID talk to him, and he told you to chill.”
“Let him deal with the consequences.” ~ MedicinalWalnuts
“NTA… ethics is a big part of your chosen profession.”
“He should know better.” ~ RoyallyOakie
“NTA, in the medical field especially giving credit where it is due is paramount.”
“Imagine him in the future stealing credit for someone else’s work and publishing a paper.”
“The consequences for being caught would be far worse than getting caught in college, so he should thank you for not doing something this stupid in the future.” ~ Impossible_Donut2631
“NTA. I have complex health conditions, and this is exactly the kind of mindset that would get me killed.”
“No thanks!” ~ high_on_acrylic
“NTA. And the problem is not that he submitted your notes, but that he claimed the credit for them.”
“That’s theft of intellectual property.”
“‘It’s just notes.'”
“‘It’s just money.'”
“‘It’s just something I wanted.'”
“Hard to see how he with that mindset could ever be a decent medical professional with the required integrity.”
“That’s why they investigate and if they find him unworthy, that’s academic cleaning house and throwing out trash.” ~ SpiritedLettuce6900
“1000% NTA.”
“He STOLE from you.”
“You did the right thing.” ~ Medium-Tear5784
“This is the consequence of his actions.”
“It’s not the one he was hoping for which was extra credit.”
“But the more reasonable one.”
“If he thought- oh, this mnemonic is awesome!”
“Everyone should know about it.”
“He could have suggested you submit it.”
“Or submitted it but with your name attached.”
“But he wanted the accolades of having come up with such a good idea.” ~ rak1882
“You’re in med school.”
“He needs to be held to a HIGHER standard, not a lower one. “
“It’s alarming that someone with such poor judgment is a med student.”
“You did the right thing.”
“You don’t know what else he’s been doing to skirt the rules and expectations.”
‘What if those few extra credit points are the difference between him graduating or not?”
“He would literally have lied his way into a field that requires integrity and sound judgment. NTA.” ~ Puzzleheaded-Age-240
OP responded…
“Yeah, that’s exactly what was bothering me.”
“I kept thinking, if he’s willing to take credit for someone else’s work over a few extra points, what else is he willing to cut corners on?”
“We’re going into a field where trust and integrity are everything.”
“I didn’t want to be the one to escalate things, but it felt wrong to just let it slide.”
“Appreciate you saying this.”
Reddit continued…
“NTA. I’m a nurse, which was not tolerated in nursing school.”
“We also had to have above an 80% score in everything and 100% on dosage/math tests.”
“This is because dishonest behavior and mistakes kill patients.”
“I do not want a doctor who lies, covers his a**, and doesn’t know WTF he’s doing.”
“I don’t want to work under a doctor like that either.”
“If he’s unprepared, lazy, and unethical, then he should not go into the medical field.”
“You are doing the correct thing by reporting and your friends who disagree don’t understand the stakes.” ~ Infinite-Nothing-336
“NTA. And it sounds like you DID talk to him first, and he blew you off.”
“He just proved that he’s willing to take someone’s work as his own.” ~ soneg
“NTA. He messed around.”
“Time for him to find out.” ~ JupiterSWarrior
“NTA – It was one thing for Jake to borrow your notes to study from. However, submitting someone else’s notes to a professor to be used as an example without coming to you first is stealing and would count as plagiarism.”
“You have every right to report it, considering he took zero responsibility and just told you to chill.” ~ amelia611
“NTA. You shared your notes.”
“He decided to share them with the professor as if it were his own.”
“That’s where he screwed up.” ~ juanredshirt
“NTA. You talked, he didn’t care.”
“If you don’t stop him now he’ll continue doing it to others as well.”
“Imagine this s**t stain taking credit for a new medical procedure and reaping the rewards.” ~ jamaul11490
“NTA. He broke the code of honor.” ~ revocer
“My high school self is saying, yes you’re the a**hole.”
“But my adult self is saying you did exactly what you needed to and we need more minds like yourself when it comes to stuff like this.”
“Half-a**ers should be weeded out of the medical field.”
“Good on you.” ~ Vahyruhl
“Not the a**hole.”
“Medical providers, first responders, and other people who serve the public need to be held to higher moral and ethical standards.”
“It comes with the territory of the profession, and it’s why you implicitly trust the people who you see when you go into a hospital or when you call 911 and they show up at your door.”
“Also, you did try to talk to him and he was a d**k about it.”
“He’s not mature enough to be a medical professional yet.” ~ CheekAccomplished150
“You DID talk to him, and he failed to see a problem in taking (extra) credit for your work. NTA.”
“I mean, is he going to take these shortcuts when he’s seeing patients?” ~ Historical_Wing3120
“Isn’t it just great when someone uses you and other people who suffer no consequences tell you to let it go?”
“They’re sending you the message that they think it’s ok for this guy to take advantage of you.”
“It’s not.”
“Maybe on the proverbial playground, you wouldn’t want to be a tattletale, but those days are over.”
“Y’all are in med school where you need to take things seriously.”
“You’re being prepared for real-world situations and consequences.”
“Definitely NTA.”
“You DID talk to him and he blew you off.”
“You gave him a chance.”
“You don’t owe him anything.” ~ phantomfire00
“NTA. Simple, He used your hard work and dedication to get HIMSELF, extra credit.”
“From personal experience, if someone I helped and considered a friend told me to ‘chill’ when they submit my work, for their own gain.”
“I would be livid.” ~ Less_Emu_3066
“NTA. He stole your work and submitted it as his own.”
“He deserves every consequence.” ~ gfdoctor
“NTA, you talked to him and he blew you off.”
“What if he does that in the field with info that is privileged, and legally endangers everyone involved?”
“Or even worse, with info that is wrong and seriously hurts patients?”
“I’m with those emphasizing the importance of integrity in the field you’re looking at moving to after school.” ~ equalquestioning2025
“I mean, you DID talk to him so your ‘friends’ have a weak grasp on reality.”
“Now, Jake is suffering the consequences, whatever those may be. NTA.” ~ LadybugGirltheFirst
“NTA. You DID just talk to him – and he brushed it off.”
‘He tried to steal your work and get credit for it.”
“If you had ever shown those notes or tried to submit them for extra credit yourself, you probably would have gotten in trouble.”
“He probably won’t lose anything for ONE incident – but the investigation may uncover a pattern of incidents that could easily mean he gets in trouble, and if so?”
“That’s on him and his own dang fault.”
“You’re not responsible for that, don’t let anyone try to convince you that it’s your fault or your problem.”
“He’s not a friend.” ~ OutragedPineapple
“NTA. You talked with a friend about him taking credit for your work and hoped he would reconsider and talk with the professor.”
“He blew you off.”
“You were in the right to report him on this.”
“If your friend is kicked out of medical school it’s his own doing and not on you.” ~ Odd-Trainer-3735
“NTA!! Your name is the most important thing you own, and it’s crazy that he’s in MED SCHOOL and he’s not doing his own work.”
“If it’s ‘just notes’ to him then he can go study by himself.”
“That’s just me being petty though… lol.”
“Also, the mutual friends should’ve put themselves in your shoes, it sucks for someone to steal the credit for something you put a lot of effort into.”
“Either way, he’s an adult and his actions have REAL consequences.” ~ MentalPomegranate610
“NTA. I had someone take hints and tips I created that took me hours and submitted it as something he would do if he were promoted.”
“I was shocked years later when I found out about it and that he passed it off as his own idea.” ~ Grouchy_Librarian343
“You did talk to him.”
“Instead of owning up to his mistake, he blew you off.”
“You did the right thing. NTA.” ~ AryaStark1313
“NTA, you did the work and deserve the credit.”
“If you let it slide once, he will take advantage of it again, and that’s not fair to you or any other students.”
“If they don’t find any other instances, then we will likely go on academic probation until they deem otherwise in a best-case scenario.” ~ ArtisticPandas300
Reddit is firmly on your side, OP.
Your friend needs to own up to his actions.
What happens next is all on him.
You did try to speak with him and he disrespected you… AGAIN!
You may want to steer clear of Jake.