Parents always want to help their children out when they’re starting out in life.
This could mean, lending them some money, helping them find a place to live, or even getting them a job at their own place of work.
But their help can only go so far, as these children are, in fact, not children any more, and must learn that favors and handouts can’t get you everywhere, and it’s important they learn to make their own way in life.
Redditor EmptyCold7477 wanted to help their children out by giving them both jobs, but soon found themself with no choice but to let their daughter go.
A decision the original poster (OP)’s wife didn’t take kindly to at all.
Worried that they behaved in a way that was not befitting a parent, the OP took to the subReddit “Am I The A**Hole” (AITA), where they asked fellow Redditors:
“AITA for firing my daughter”
The OP explained that their daughter was not leaving a strong impression with them or their staff, making the possibility of keeping her on untenable.
“Both of my kids work at the restaurant that I run, and have for the last few years.”
“My son is 19 and my daughter is 17.”
“Whereas my son will come in early, do the little ‘extra’, things when nobody is looking and will just really put his nose to the grindstone, my daughter is not that.”
“There are problems that I was seeing, like texting when she was supposed to be working, showing up 30, 45 minutes late, etc, that I actually addressed with her myself.”
“She told me she’d shape up.”
“What I like to do is, a couple of times a year, meet with my staff, all one on one and just ask them if things are going well in their view, what needs to be changed, what issues, if any, need handling.”
“It became glaring, after talking to everyone one on one, that my daughter was just not a team player, not very helpful, gave everyone an attitude, and unfortunately carried around this, as one of my staff called it, a ‘princess attitude’, I guess thinking she was teflon because I’m the owner.”
“Privately, I told my daughter that I loved her, but that I just couldn’t run a business where one person is not willing to work as a part of the team.”
“I let her go.”
“When I got home, my wife was enraged, asked me how I could fire our little girl?”
“I tried explaining that, firing her wasn’t something I liked doing, but, when you have literally everyone else who works there, telling me that she’s lazy and acts entitled, I can’t just keep her on.”
“My wife says I’m the AH for what I did.”
Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation by declaring:
- NTA – Not the A**hole
- YTA – You’re the A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everybody Sucks Here
The Reddit community was in agreement that the OP did the right thing by firing their daughter, and was not the a**hole for doing so.
Everyone agreed that the OP’s daughter needed to learn that the OP’s daughter needed to learn not to rely on nepotism, and if she wanted to keep her job she needed to step up, with many feeling their wife needed to learn the same lesson.
“NTA and your wife is actually helping the ‘princess attitude with this.”
“She didn’t do her job, was pretty shitty to her coworkers so it’s only fair that she’s unemployed now.”
‘Pulling the ‘how could you fire our little girl?!’ it’s pretty messed up.”-parfait-keyy
“NTA, hopefully she learns a valuable lesson from this.”-penniless_tenebrous
“You talked to your daughter and she didn’t change her behavior.”
“You were paying someone to not do their job, show up late, and act entitled, probably because her dad is the owner.”
“Keeping her on would just create resentment with the other staff who are actually doing their jobs.”- Locutus747
“Your WIFE is TA for wanting you to let nepotism threaten y’alls LIVELIHOOD!”
“It’s understandable that they’re both upset, but you have a business to run!”
“Do NOT apologize to your wife, or daughter about this.”
“They obviously don’t like it, but they will have to respect your decision.”
“That means so much more in the long run!”
“Best wishes.”- Head_Photograph9572
“NTA Does your wife have the same princess attitude?”- astrologydork
“It’s probably better for her to work for someone she’s not related to.”- pfashby
“By the sounds of it you gave her fair warning she wasn’t pulling her weight.”
“This should be a valuable lesson.”
“Just thinking from your wife’s perspective, how clear were you that she was on thin ice and likely to get fired if she didn’t improve?”
“My only concern is that the original conversation might not have been clear as, being her father, you didn’t want to upset her.”
“Just a thought going forward, but I don’t think you actually did anything wrong.”- Blake_Raven
“Your daughter is a little princess because her mom enables her.”
“What that means is that your wife isn’t focused on your daughter’s best interest.”
“She’s setting your daughter up for failure in life.”
“You’re right to maintain the same expectations of her as you do for other staff.”
“Having her undermine the whole staff due to her entitlement is a serious risk to morale in the business.”
“Talk to you wife and see if you can get on the same page.”
“If not, put your foot down.”- Czexxi
“I also own & manage a restaurant, it’s bad enough to have a co-worker that doesn’t pull their weight.”
“It could cause serious problems with the rest of your staff if you truly did treat your daughter like a princess.”
“It’s not doing her any favors either, she needs to learn a good work ethic no matter what her future holds.”- oddgrrl99
“You did the right thing for your business, your employees AND your daughter.”
“Sorry to say you won’t be having sex for quite a while, though.”- JiuJitsuBoy2001
“This isn’t out of the blue.”
“You had previously discussed it with her and if she was too distracted to realize that those around her were, shall we say, unimpressed with her lack of commitment she needs to learn that lesson.”
“Kudos to you, OP, for having solid enough relationships with your staff that they are comfortable telling you how they really feel and taking it seriously enough to do something about it.”
“I really hope that her lack of a job hits your daughter financially so she can understand the need for hard work and ensuring you keep your job.”
“For your wife, well it can be tough for the parent outside the work environment that hasn’t seen everything first hand.”
“Doesn’t mean that she should doubt your decision and condone your daughter’s behavior.”
“For the lesson to stick she needs to get on board…quickly.”
“I would avoid any future comparisons to how hard your son works as that could escalate tensions on the home front.”
“Not that your son shouldn’t be praised for his efforts but rather that this is about one member of the team and family that wasn’t pulling their weight.”
“You have enough evidence from the rest of the staff without putting one kid on a pedestal, regardless of how well deserved, during the time the other is getting a lesson in life.”
“Lastly, on behalf of many people that have had to deal with a favored staff member, be that family or otherwise, who kept their job regardless of not doing the required work.”
“Thank you for your courage and making the world just a touch more balanced and fair.”-AforAuPair
“At first I thought you were going to say you fired her for not providing unpaid labour past the scope of her role, like your son does.”
“Then you would have been an A.”
“But showing up late and creating a bad environment for all the other staff… it would have been unfair on them for you to keep her working there.”- ttnl35
“Not only are you NTA but you’re a gatdang champion in my eyes.”
“I’ve worked in restaurants where the owner’s/manager’s kids could damn near get away with murder and it was just the absolute worst dealing with these entitled jerks.”
“I can almost guarantee you gained a ton of respect from your staff for holding her accountable.”
“I know I’m impressed.”- ModernWolfman
“NTA. When you’re at work, you are now her boss, not her parent.”
“And she needs to learn what working is about.”
“Your wife is looking at it from a parent point of view and not an employer point of view.”-Original_Vanilla7126
No parent wants to fire their own child.
But giving a child special treatment at a place of business when they are slacking off on their work is not only unfair to the rest of the hard working staff, but will not do the child any favors in the future.
Here’s hoping the OP’s daughter and wife realize this before too long.
And what better sign that you need to start stepping up to the plate than being fired by your own father.