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Short Woman Blasts Rude SIL For Mocking Her With ‘Sexy Baby’ Comments In Front Of Family

two women arguing
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People come in all shapes and sizes.

Mocking someone for their size or shape is increasingly frowned upon by society.

A short woman dealing with her rude sister-in-law turned to the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit for feedback.

Goodluckbabes asked:

“AITA for calling out my sister-in-law (SIL) in front of everyone when she wouldn’t stop making comments about me trying to be a ‘sexy baby’?”

The original poster (OP) explained:

“I’m 27, female. I’m a very short woman, 4’9 and under 100lbs.”

“I don’t want to complain about being small, but there are a lot of people out there (especially other women) who will not take us seriously, are judgmental, make snide comments, assume attraction to us is nefarious, etc… A lot of comments that imply we’re not real women etc…”

“I’m used to it and usually let it roll off my back. But there’s a new one that’s picked up momentum that I guess stems from a TV show where a girl is putting on a childish act, and she says, ‘I’m a very sexy baby’ in a cutesy voice, and there’s a lot more to it that you can just Google.”

“My SIL Cassie has picked this up and has been using this ‘against me’. I can’t wear a cute outfit without her coming down on me and chiding me for ‘buying into the whole sexy baby thing’ when I am JUST WEARING AN OUTFIT.”

“I’m just trying to be ME. God forbid I wear a shorter skirt or bows or anything I think is cute.”

“It’s like I’m not allowed to wear cute or sexy things because I’m petite, so I’m automatically seen as trying to be a ‘sexy baby’ when I’m not. I’ve asked Cassie to stop or drop it, and she maintains that I’m the one opening myself up to judgment and that I should dress my age.”

“This came to a head last weekend when we were in my auntie’s backyard at the pool. I took off my wrap so I could hang with my feet in the pool with my cousins and Cassie immediately said ‘You’re a very sexy baby’ at me and twirled imaginary pigtails.”

“I raised my voice and said, ‘That’s a really weird thing to keep saying. What is your problem with me? Why do you keep bringing up that I’m small?’.”

“She started to turn red and she yelled back again that I’m the one that’s choosing to walk around looking like the ‘sexy baby’.”

“I said that I’m literally just wearing a bathing suit (a one-piece halter) and asked her what I should be wearing instead if that’s such a problem.”

“She yelled back that I should ‘dress like a grown adult’ and to stop trying to cause a scene in front of everyone. I said whatever and just tried to ignore her.”

“Later on, we ended up inside at the same time, and she came down on me for calling her out in front of everyone. I told her to stop trying to make me feel bad for being small that I didn’t choose this body.”

“She rolled her eyes and told me to grow the f*ck up, and that ‘trying to start sh*t’ with her is even more proof.”

“I am at a loss here and I’m starting to just not want to be around my family because of her. It’s not enough that I get this sh*t from women at work, at the gym, basically anywhere; now it’s in my family.”

“AITA for calling her out?”

“Or even for just… I don’t know, existing in my own body?”

“It’s my brother’s wife, he doesn’t care. We’ve never been close/gotten along. He’ll always take her side.”

“Other people in my family are very hands-off/handle your business yourself. Just the way they are.”

“Also Cassie isn’t fat, she’s just average height.”

The OP summed up their situation.

“I confronted my SIL for her comments about me, but it was in front of everyone in the family, and I know it embarrassed her. It made me the a**hole for making it public instead of approaching her in private.”

Redditors weighed in by declaring:

  • NTA – Not The A**hole
  • YTA – You’re The A**hole
  • NAH – No A**holes Here
  • ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

Redditors decided the OP was not the a**hole (NTA).

“WTF‽‽ What part of a one-piece halter is not age-appropriate for a 27-year-old?”

“Start sh*t? After all that sh*t spewing from her mouth? You’re just wiping it off or spraying it with a bidet.”

“NTA. Tell her don’t start sh*t if you don’t want to be called out.” ~ tango421

“NTA. Your SIL does seem obsessed with calling you out for, checking notes…. wearing clothes. This is not ‘sexy’ clothing. It’s just small, because, well, you’re petite.”

“Enlist your brother to talk to her about this. Let her know that it needs to stop NOW.”

“It’s sizeist. You’ve asked her to stop, and she hasn’t. It’s time to establish firm boundaries and enforce them.” ~ NotCreativeAtAll16

“The SIL is being creepy. She’s mad that the OP finally called her on it, and is continuing to deflect and blame the OP rather than be quiet.”

“Others in the family need to stick up for the OP. The SIL has issues and they’re not the OP’s problem. NTA.” ~ FancyPantsDancer

“I’m friends with someone OP’s size. We’ve gotten weird looks in public for letting the ‘child’ with us drink. She absolutely gets weird looks for sexy bikinis, etc…”

“They just see this very tiny person and assume she’s like… 12 or younger. We get looks. We ignore them.”

“However, once you talk to her, she’s clearly an educated adult, even if she has a very high voice that sounds… young. She doesn’t talk like a child, though, and it’s very easy to see her as an adult after a minute because she acts like an adult.”

“Nothing she wears that is ‘sexy’ is inappropriate because she’s a grown f*cking woman in a grown woman’s body and it just happens to be a slim, short, petite one. I have a slim, petite frame, too. I just happen to be five and half feet tall and therefore looked at as a ‘real’ adult by strangers.”

“However, nobody who knows that friend thinks it’s weird she does adult things. Because she’s an adult.”

“I’d (verbally) fight with someone saying that sh*t around her. Like, she’s an adult. She does adult things. Cry more.”

“I don’t think anything she does is childlike, and only when out in public does it come up because other people stare.”

“SIL has issues and is trying to stomp OP’s self-esteem. The rest of the people around her need to shut that down. It’s just rude. NTA.” ~ DefinitelyNotAliens

“I’m not as small as you but I’m pretty tiny compared to the general population at five foot one and 117 lbs. I’m almost 40 thank you and a grown a** woman, and getting passive aggressive comments about my size is so f*cking exhausting.”

“NTA. With your sh*tty SIL, I’d either Gray Rock her or put on your best Regina George impression and respond with ‘Why are you so obsessed with me‽‽’. Maybe a combination of the two.” ~ Jacqued_and_Tan

“NTA. Detach emotionally because Cassie resents you for looking the way you do, because there’s something she wants about it. The same is true for other women.”

“They’re being petty and small emotionally, when they want to be petty and small physically. It’s political, it’s gross, and you didn’t get to choose, just like them.”

“Small = feminine is something they resent, and they see it in you, which isn’t your problem.”

“Keep cool, talk to the person who’s looping Cassie into your life, and if that doesn’t work and she keeps doing it, refocus.”

“Forget the insult that is baby. Focus on the fact that your sister-in-law calls you sexy against your wishes. Make it weird for her.”

Cassie ‘ooh, look who’s being all sexy baby today’.”

“You, ‘Cassie, if I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a thousand times, don’t call me sexy. Don’t call me baby. I don’t want to have sex with you or date you. I WON’T EVER want to have sex with you or date you. It’s so uncomfortable when you call me sexy’.”

“She’s either going to short circuit or say something like ‘no! I’m trying to be mean to you!’ You ‘by calling me sexy? Wtf are you talking about Cassie?’.”

“Act like you’ve never heard the term sexy baby. Make her explain what the f*ck her problem is, and don’t play for her, play for the crowd.”

“She’s trying to shame you. Make it bite her in the face.” ~ imyourkidnotyourmom

“NTA, for wearing cute clothes OR for being you! Just because you’re petite doesn’t give her the right or anybody the right to call you ‘sexy baby’ or tell you ‘dress your age’ when clearly you are.”

“She’s probably jealous or just thinks she’s funny. Either way, keep confronting her and calling her out until she learns her lesson to respect other women who are just trying to live.”

“You should call her out every time. I stand by that since brother/family will do nothing. Clearly, she has a problem, and you have to solve it.” ~ Familiar_Room_9318

The OP shouldn’t have to handle such abuse and should be allowed to wear whatever she likes.

Written by Amelia Mavis Christnot

Amelia Christnot is an Oglala Lakota, Kanien'kehá:ka Haudenosaunee and Metís Navy brat who settled in the wilds of Northern Maine. A member of the Indigenous Journalists Association, she considers herself another proud Maineiac.