Alarm clocks seem to be a common point of contention for people who share living spaces. Usually, the issue revolves around the person who needs to wake up not waking, while people who want to sleep are awoken.
A sibling turned to the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit for feedback after turning off their brother’s alarm.
Resident_Sleeper9123 asked:
“AITA for turning off my brother’s ‘motivational’ alarm that plays a speech every morning?”
The original poster (OP) explained:
“My brother recently decided he is on a self-improvement grind. For the past two weeks, his alarm has been a loud motivational speech about discipline, success, and waking up at 5 AM to ‘outwork everyone else’.”
“The problem is, he does not wake up to it. I do. It goes off every single morning at 5 AM and plays for five straight minutes while he snoozes it again and again.”
“I asked him multiple times to change it to something quieter, but he said the speech is ‘part of his mindset’ and that I should respect his routine.”
“This morning, after five minutes of someone yelling about success and hustle, I got up and turned his phone completely off. He slept through his class and when he woke up he was furious.”
“Now he says I sabotaged his personal growth and disrespected his goals. I feel like I just wanted to sleep.”
“AITA?”
The OP summed up why they might be the a**hole in their situation.
“I might be the a**hole because I physically turned off my brother’s phone without his permission, which directly caused him to miss his class.”
“Even though his alarm was waking me up every morning, I still interfered with his routine and schedule instead of just continuing to talk it out or finding another solution.”
“From his point of view, my action cost him something important, and that is why he believes I am in the wrong.”
Redditors weighed in by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Redditors decided the OP was not the a**hole (NTA).
“NTA. He’s mad at you for disrespecting his goals, yet he can’t even respect his own goals by getting up on time. Maybe the ‘you hit snooze you lose’ approach will be good for him!” ~ GhostofZellers
“Exactly NTA here OP. It is preposterous if he tries to blame anyone but himself for interfering his ‘personal growth’. It’s high time you did that.” ~ Admirable-Pepper3177
“I wake up at 4:45 to a single beep of an iPhone standard alarm at half volume. Tell him he’s got a skill issue and he’ll never make it.” ~ sourdough_s8n
“Yeah OP, tell him ‘only betas hit snooze, step up’.” ~ thoracicbunk
“NTA. Waking up others with your alarms is annoying as f*ck, especially when it’s some bullsh*t motivational speech alarm.” ~ ItsRandxm
“Make your alarm bagpipes and set it to go off 5 minutes before his. Placing it under his pillow is optional.” ~ Avery357
“NTA. I’m not saying it seems to be an essential part of hustle-bro ‘culture’ to be completely rude and thoughtless to everyone who has to share space with you, but I’m not not saying it.” ~ Beruthiel999
“Waking up at 5am doesn’t make you a better or more hardworking person. Sleep science indicates that it’s counterproductive to force your body into a time zone that isn’t right for you.”
“Everyone has an innate preference for how much sleep and when that sleep should occur. For some people, it’s deeply hardwired, for others, it’s more malleable. The fact that he’s sleeping through this shows that his body is seriously rejecting 5 am wake-ups.”
Anyway, it probably would have been better to wake him up to let him know you were turning off his phone. Then, it’s 100% his responsibility if he misses class.”
“Still, I’ll say NTA. He should use a regular alarm clock that doesn’t disturb your sleep, and he can listen to his military affirmations on his AirPods as he gets ready for the day.” ~ CannibalismIsTight
“NTA. You have goals too, and I’m sure one of them is to get enough rest.” ~ EntrepreneurOld7107
“Damn, when I had to routinely get up at 5AM, I made sure my smart watch was set for 4:50, so it would just vibrate. My 5AM was a failsafe in case I slept through the watch.
“I think in that two-year period I only woke my other half up twice. Basic respect for others is clearly too hard for some people. NTA.” ~ HefinLlewelyn
“It seems you’re going to wake up regardless of what his alarm is. ‘Support him’ by waking him up when the alarm goes off. He’ll learn to get up when it goes off.”
“I’ll leave it to you as to how to wake him up. Tell him he’s got a choice: either get up when his alarm goes off, or you’ll turn it off.” ~ OldGeekWeirdo
“NTA—he needs to find a motivational talk that he can listen to at low volume as he is falling asleep. If his alarm is waking other members of the household, he needs a new alarm.”
“If he hits snooze on the alarm loud enough to wake others, he needs a lesson. You just gave him one.” ~ donnacus
“He needs a motivational speech about hustling to wake up to his own alarm. But also, he’s probably listening to a complete grifter.” ~ Lower_Amount3373
“You are most definitely NTA. We are all entitled to our own ‘mindset’ until it interferes with others need for sleep.” ~ Philosemen69
“If you’ve got to be up at 5am, time to get a glass of cold water… and pour it over his head. A few days of this and I’m sure he will find motivation to get up with his alarm.” ~ Phoenyx_wilson
“While I hit snooze a lot, my phone isn’t very loud unless I leave it beeping… which sometimes happens because a) I left it in the bedroom while going to the bathroom or b) I’m so tired I can’t even rouse myself to hit snooze.”
“In that case, I sometimes dream that I’m shutting it off but it still beeps or I dream I’m trying to find it to shut it off…. which is annoying cause it won’t stop beeping and I can’t rouse myself enough to shut it off but…. yeah thankfully I do not sleep close enough to anyone to annoy them with my alarm.” ~ Sheylenna
“NTA. Tell him his reasoning only stands up if he wakes up and listens to the thing. Even then, he has to respect that a loud alarm, even a speech, is designed to wake people up and, so after it has served its purpose, it needs to be turned off or the volume turned way down.”
“For him to hit snooze rather than getting up straight away is him giving the finger to his supposed ‘motivation’ and just him inconsiderately waking you up. There is no ‘personal growth’ going on once he hits snooze.” ~ kurokomainu
“NTA. Next time it wakes you up just go throw water on him. Just a cup with ice in it, he will soon stop letting it wake you up.” ~ penguin-47
“It’s going to be hard for his alarm to motivate him if he sleeps through it every morning. NTA.” ~ Weird-Roll6265
“Don’t turn it off anymore.”
“Next time he doesn’t wake up to the motivational yelling bullsh*t, get up and throw a glass of water at him.”
“Help your brother like he wants so badly.”
“His bed will get all wet and he won’t be able to stay in it. It will be great for getting that energy and motivation to get out of bed.” ~ asdfghjkl0479
“I don’t think it’s you who is sabotaging his personal goals if he’s putting the alarm on snooze continuously or sleeping through it…”
“It probably wasn’t great that he slept through his alarm for class, and if you knew he was going to be late and it was the first time maybe you could have done him a solid anyway, but he also needs to show consideration for other members of the household.”
“No one else in the house should be getting woken up to anyone’s 5am alarms unless they’re in the same bed and they’re a SUPER light sleeper, otherwise that’s the sign they’re being inconsiderate. NTA.” ~ rybpyjama
“NTA. It doesn’t sound like it’s motivating him nearly as much as he claims. If it did, he’d get his a** in gear instead of subjecting you to the snooze.” ~ Rude-Manufacturer635
“If he can’t wake up early enough to stop you, then he’s not in the grindset. NTA.” ~ NatashOverWorld
“I have no tolerance for people who ignore their alarms and snooze six times in a row. NTA and anyone like them sucks.” ~ MissionMassive563
“NTA. He’s not respecting your personal growth, as you’re not getting enough sleep. Wouldn’t be so bad if he got up when it went off and listened to the speech elsewhere.”
“Only himself to blame, he didn’t get up when the alarm went off the first time.” ~ CompetitionOdd1746
“Make your alarm the most objectionable music you can find and set it for 4:30 every morning. Let it play for a good 3 to 5 minutes, then snooze it. When he complains, tell him it’s part of your mindset, but if he fixes his alarm, you’ll fix yours.” ~ readergirl35
If an alarm is waking up everyone up except for the person setting it, it’s not an effective alarm.
It’s just an annoyance.