Tipping culture is unknown in some parts of the world where employees and employers aren't reliant on tips for workers to approach a living wage. While lower pay scales for certain classifications of workers aren't a universal policy, tipping for certain services where skilled workers generally set their own prices has become more commonplace.
Getting your hair styled or a tattoo? A tip has become customary for satisfactory service. Your plumber or electrician does a great job? No tip is expected. Staying in a hotel? Leaving a tip for housekeeping has become more common. Having a dress or suit custom fitted? Just the fee for services rendered is customary.
The why and how of tipping only certain skilled workers or service providers is iinteresting. As is deciding to not follow tipping customs.
A person getting their hair styled and highlighted turned to the "Am I The A**Hole" (AITAH) subReddit for feedback over a "Would I Be The A**hole" (WIBTAH) question about not tipping the customary 20%.
Similar to AITA, the AITAH subReddit allows posters to ask for advice and post about ending romantic relationships—both things that are banned on AITA. However, there are no required voting acronyms—only suggested ones—and no official final judgment declared.
Bubblerush asked:
"WIBTAH for not tipping on an $800 CAD (~$570 USD) hair appointment?"
The original poster (OP) explained:
"I have a hair appointment coming up that’ll be around $800 (~$570 USD) for about 3 hours. I know stylists have business expenses, and I’m obviously paying for her skill but 20% on top is another $160 (~$114 USD) and that just feels insane to me."
"I always tip servers 20% because they make minimum wage and I’m happy to tip on a $50-$100 bill, but when the service itself is already this expensive and they set their own prices, I don’t really understand why I’m expected to add another huge amount on top."
"The service itself will already be over $250 (~$570 USD) an hour.
"I’ll probably feel embarrassed hitting no tip, but almost $1000 (~$713 USD) for a hair appointment feels ridiculous."
"WIBTAH?"
OP later added:
"Just answering some of the common questions here to give a bit more context. It’s just a cut and highlights and I live in a major city. I also have very long, very thick hair, so the price reflects the extra product and extra time it takes."
"$500 to $800 (~$357 to $570 USD) is pretty normal for me when I get my hair coloured, which is why I only do it a couple times a year. For all the women saying it doesn’t cost that much for them, congratulations?"
"Also, I can afford to tip, for everyone saying if I can’t afford to tip I can’t afford the service, that’s not really the point. I just don’t know that I think another 20% is necessary when the service itself is already $800."
"I think everyone here is misunderstanding. She rents a chair in this salon, meaning she pays the owner a base fee and sets her own prices. She still needs to pay her chair rent, but all of the money goes to her directly, not towards the building or salaries for other people."
"I’m not from the United States, I’m Canadian, so we’re talking Canadian dollars."
Some Redditors weighed in by using the AITA voting acronyms:
- NTA - Not The A**hole
- YTA - You're The A**hole
- NAH - No A**holes Here
- ESH - Everyone Sucks Here
- INFO - more information needed
Redditors couldn't decide if the OP would be the a**hole for not tipping their stylist.
"Maybe I’m extremely stingy but since you stated you’re in Canada, I’m in Canada too and I make minimum wage. And when I do go buy coffee or a meal and there was exactly 0 service besides them taking my order and making it I also don’t understand why should I tip?"
"So more over why would I tip on a haircut when I know for sure that the American tipping system was inherited to Canada without logic. Our minimum wage can’t be even compared to the American so why tip?"
"And I don’t agree with 'if you can’t afford to tip you can’t afford the service'. It’s clear and it’s like a contract if she agreed to a specific amount. If she wanted more she could’ve asked for more."
"Why is anyone depending on someone’s kindness or mercy to make money?" ~ Border_Andromeda
"Is she the owner of her business, setting her own prices, or is she an employee and prices are set by the salon? Convention says you should tip employees, but not owners."
"To be honest, I'd recommend reaching out to her and asking if the price is all inclusive or if additional tip is expected. It's a perfectly normal question to ask and then you'll know and can make a decision." ~ harleybarleyy
"I have struggled with this for years. It just feels like way too much to tip 20% on something that is so inflated. Like say overhead and product is $300 per hour which I sincerely doubt. They are still making $100 per hour. ~ Smooshymooshy
"As a stylist myself who has clients that can run services 600-800 I just wanted to chime in. I know if i did a service that took over half my day to do, especially a labor intensive service, I would be disappointed that I didnt get some kind of tip."
"We all know tips are not an obligation, but in a service industry job like ours, that tip is a thanks for our time, our education, our expertise, it's a 'thanks for a job well done', but it's also a fairly big chunk of our income.
A tip also kind of helps in terms of like if you tried booking in last minute, a stylist might make a priority of getting you in on short notice if you're a good tipper. You'll probably get a better service as well. I know that I don't go above and beyond for a client I know doesn't tip."
"You'll get good service, but I won't do the extra little things like a longer head massage, or maybe a moisture treatment in the sink if I have some extra time, things like that. No tip also makes me think you hated the service." ~ starborndreams
"NTA. For that price - they aren’t expecting a tip. Some stylists and salons set prices for patrons to decide the value of their service through a tip and some set prices on what they want to earn and think their service is worth."
"$800 for a cut and highlights is the latter. They’ve set their price at an elite level and I actually think tipping diminishes their professionalism."
"You wouldn’t tip a lawyer who charged a similar hourly rate, why would you tip a hair stylist? I wouldn’t feel bad for not tipping. For reference, I’m also Canadian and completely understand the tipping culture guilt." ~ ScarcityBackground12
"You always have the option of not tipping, but it may affect the stylists feelings about you. No way around that consequence, regardless of whether Reddit deems you an a**hole or not. You just have to decide if you care or not." ~ Pixelant3
"I'm an attorney with 6 years of experience in a niche litigation field in a high COL area, and my billable rate is only $650 -- and I only keep about a third of that. A hair dresser billing $270 is outrageous. And tipping culture has gone way too far. If you think you deserve $1000 for the job instead of $800, then just charge $1000 and find out. Don't charge $800 and then guilt your customers into paying significantly more at the end. ~ Charming-Fig-2544
After receiving such mixed feedback, the OP provided some final thoughts:
"Wow, okay, I genuinely did not expect over 4 million people to see this. People are still extremely divided, so somehow I think I’m leaving more confused than when I started."
"The most helpful comments have been from actual hairstylists, and most of them have said I’m absolutely not an a**hole for not tipping 20% on an $800 service. A lot said that at higher price points, their clients either don’t tip or just tip a flat amount like $20-$50. So I think I’ve landed on tipping $50 if she does a great job and leaving it at that."
"Also, a lot of people seem genuinely shocked by the price of my appointment. Yes, I know $800 is expensive. I have very long, very thick hair and I always end up paying significantly more than the listed base price because my hair takes more time and product. That’s just the reality of having my hair and I’m happy to pay for it. I’m extremely particular about who touches it and this stylist does amazing work."
"I did try going somewhere cheaper last time and still paid around $500; I just didn’t get the result I wanted. So now I’m paying more for someone I trust to actually get me there."
"And finally, I truly do not know why this turned into the low maintenance Olympics. To the countless women telling me how little they pay for their hair or how rarely they get it done, congratulations. I’m happy for you."
OP didn't get a definitive response, but they got a decision they can live with. So, I guess they got what they needed in the end.
