How much proof or convincing would it take for you to accuse your significant other of cheating?
Redditor throwra_advice12 held back her suspicions about her husband’s faithfulness after she stumbled upon something while cleaning the bathroom.
But she became paranoid after he was dismissive towards her when she inquired about some peculiar DNA samples.
Not wanting to jump to conclusions, she turned to the Relationship Advice subReddit to see what strangers on the internet had to say about the curious case.
The original Poster (OP) wrote:
“I (29 F[emale]) keep finding long hairs in my bathroom, which is strange because my husband (32 M[ale]) is bald and I have a short pixie crop hairstyle.”
“This started a few weeks ago. While cleaning the bathroom I found a number of long hair strands over my bathroom wall by the shower.”
“This struck me as very odd because not only does my husband not have hair, I also wear a very cropped, short hairstyle. So it’s impossible for the strands I found to belong to either me or my husband.”
“Confused I washed them away but couldn’t stop thinking about it. I decided not to mention it but kept looking out for them. There seems to be a pattern that there’s hairs appearing when I’m either at work or out for a longer time period.”
“I feel like I’m going crazy and feel like I shouldn’t just immediately go to my husband cheating on me with a longer haired woman. I asked my husband about it and he just shrugged.”
“Which makes me more paranoid as surely this is something that’s strange so why is he so blasé about it! I’m starting to think he’s playing it down to stop me from finding out the truth.”
“It happened again two days ago and I asked my husband again. He dismissed it but this time admitted it’s strange but told me the only explanation is that they must be my hairs. They are not and after saying so, now he’ll just ignore me if I bring it up.”
“I don’t want to assume my husband is cheating on me and accuse him of such over something so ridiculous, but I’m driving myself into the ground trying to work out how the hairs have got there without my husband dismissing it as nothing.”
“During lockdown we haven’t had any visitors (that I know of) so can rule out his sister.”
Redditors weighed in with their thoughts, starting with this person who asked questions to rule out the OP’s suspicions.
“Do you do your laundry at a public laundromat or share washers and dryers with anyone? Or is there anyone you have been in contact with during this time that has long hair?”
“While unlikely, that may explain finding hairs once or twice. But if it’s recurring, especially in the shower, I don’t think you are unreasonable to be suspicious.” – holyylemons
“Or if you had long hair at some point in the past year. I cut mine off in March and I’m still finding my own long hairs in clothing, and around the house up until we moved.”
“I would look for color and thickness as an indicator as to if it is yours from the past or someone else’s.” – squobiime
“Does he sit in different places at his job like a conference room?”
“We got new office chairs last year with mesh cloth backs and noticed my long hair was absolutely caked on the back of my chair! I was horrified at myself!”
“Now i know i have to clean the fuzz off and untangle the hairballs on the back of my chair every couple of months.” – DuxM_yard
“It’s weird that she finds them on the wall on the shower. I have long hair and when some comes out during washing (not a lot but shampoo always causes a few hairs to get ‘loose’) and I put it on the wall so it’s not in my hands or sticks to my body.”
“I think a lot of people do that? Hair stuck together on the wall is exactly what happens if you shower and don’t clean afterwards.”
“If the hair appears like, in the carpet or on the sofa or in other places where it sticks if you naturally lose it then yes, could be anyone’s or could be older hair prior to OP cutting her (no idea if it’s recent).”
“If it exclusively appears in the shower, and consistently on the wall, but doesn’t appear when OP is home a lot…. well, that tells a different story.” – darthvadercake
One Redditor even insinuated the possibility that the husband could be leading a double life.
“Could it be a wig? Could your husband be into cross dressing?” – NoFaceManyHeart
“Yeah this isn’t a bad idea, next time you find a hair let it dry then burn it. Human hair burns very differently to a wig hair.”
“Burn a stand of your hair to see the difference. I’ve done this before, and it was from a wig (for the reason above).” – warholsnotdead
The OP entertained the possibility and responded:
“I will do a meticulous search of the house for any wigs and possible drag paraphernalia.”
The husband’s reaction still made Redditors skeptical.
“Depending on how long the strands are, they could very well be OP’s hair. I have dyed brown hair that I wear short, like almost-pixie length.”
“My sister kept nagging that my hair was everywhere and I thought it was impossible cause mine was so short and the scattered hair was long-ish. Except the hair was very brown and everyone else had black hair so.”
“But the husband’s attitude towards the whole thing does seem suspicious af, so I unfortunately think there’s a third person here. OP, maybe set up babysitter cameras at home (without your SO’s knowledge ofc), or even a baby monitor. Catch him redhanded.” – bonkerred
“You can also Change the bedsheets. Go to work for a longer period of time/visit your aunt or whatever for 2 days.”
“Come back and see if he changed the sheets again. If he did, might be a bad sign and afterwards you can still do the hiding in bushes thing.” – Jujumofu
“Start collecting all the hairs until one day you have enough of them to create a persuasive wig out of it.”
“Once you have the wig, wear it and sit in the living room with your back facing the front door. When your husband walks through, pretend to be the mistress and record his reaction with a hidden camera.”
“If he is confused as to who is in his living room, he’s not cheating. If he says ‘what are you doing here,’ you got a problem. Hope this helps.” – jonny4256
There have been no further developments that involved making a wig or hiding out in the bushes.
As far as Redditors are concerned, this case remains an unsolved mystery.