Not everyone deals with annoying kids in public well.
Redditor Reasonable-Onion6764 is the case in point.
While out for dinner he got fed up with a disruptive child and his actions ended up leaving the child in tears.
This led the original poster (OP) to subReddit “Am I the A**hole?” (AITA) for advice.
He asked:
“AITA for screaming at a child and making him cry?”
He went on to explain.
“I [male age 21] went to eat with some friends from college to a restaurant that’s near the campus.”
“The place is not the nicest, but it’s better food than McDonald’s and we use to go there when we want to have a ’semi special occasion’.”
“This time the occasion was that the four of our had passed our exams.”
“It was lunch time, the place was not completely full, but full enough. We had bad weather so we stayed inside (everyone did). Most people were adults.”
“Then two women (an older one and a middle aged one) came with a baby and a kid around 7/10 years old.”
“I was sitting facing the door so I saw them walk in but I didn’t think any of it, I’m not someone easily annoyed by kids most times.”
“They took a table in a corner. Our table was around the middle of the room.”
“We were waiting for our food and chatting. The kid was playing with the baby and they were making a bit of noise, but then again we all were making noise as most of us were accompanied and chatting.”
“After our food came in though, the kid started to wander around. He wanted to read a sign near the door, then one near the back.”
“After that he wanted to go to bathroom, then he wanted to go outside, etc. It was kinda annoying, but quite easy to just ignore.”
“Should I say that neither of the women that were with him did nothing to stop him, not at any time.”
“At some point, the kid started to run around while yelling, he was playing to something by himself. He went on and on, and neither of the women did something.”
“Other people were looking annoyed too. He even accidentally hit my friend’s chair. As we were in the middle table, he started running circles around us.”
“By the third time he tried passing next to me I put my arm out to stop him.”
“I told him to stop that and to go sit down and wait until he’s home to run around because it’s inappropriate to bother other people at a public space.”
“I also told him I’ll have him wait outside alone if he doesn’t behaves (which I was obviously not gonna do because I can’t basically, it was just to scare him off).”
“I honestly don’t know how it came out, in my mind I was quite calm but apparently I was screaming at the kid.”
“The kid started to cry and then (I assume) his mom came in and told me off for telling at him and how he’s just a kid and was playing and such.”
“I told her I wouldn’t have had to do anything if she would have told the kid to stay quiet before.”
“Some guy from the staff came in and asked what happened. She told him I had yelled at the kid, I told him that yeah I did but calmly explained why I did it.”
“He said that we should just let this go for once and that next time the staff will manage the situation before anything happens. The woman was fuming so they left.”
“My friends told me I did in fact screamed at the kid but they were annoyed too and said they were about to complain with management over this kid.”
“I honestly think that would’ve been the best idea and now I think that I took the wrong turn here.”
Redditors weighed in by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Redditors decided:
“Your friends told you you were screaming at a child and you still don’t know if you were an a**hole?”
“You threatened him with being left outside all alone until he cried and you still don’t know if you were an a**hole?”
“Unbelievable, dude. YTA. Just complain to the wait staff next time and have them deal with it.” – undertherosetrellis
“Op is an AH.”
“The kids mum is also an AH”
“Making this ESH” – ThatFatGuyMJL
“As a teacher, not a parent yet. Never threaten a child with something you can’t actually follow through on.”
“They are smart, they will know, and you will look like a fool with less authority then you had before.”
“Also, OP, YATA just tell management. Not your kid and you have no authority in that restaurant. There is no reason a random kid needs to listen to you anyway.” – melodybounty
“YTA. If you have a problem with a kid’s behavior, you don’t start screaming at the kid, you go talk to the adults in charge so they can deal with it.”
“By your own friends’ admission, you overstepped your bounds in a big way. Learn to control your own behavior before you presume to dictate the same to a child.” – morgaine125
“yta”
“‘I also told him I’ll have him wait outside alone if he doesn’t behaves (which I was obviously not gonna do because I can’t basically, it was just to scare him off).’”
“this is extreme and very strange scare him off your threatening to punish a child who is not yours” – Born-Teacher-5157
“YTA. You don’t discipline, let alone scream at a young child directly. You address any issue to the parents or the staff of the place you are eating.”
“You have no idea of that child’s history and to threaten to separate him and leave him alone could frighten him in ways you haven’t even thought about.” – sirandtheirDLW
“Might have to go with YTA.”
“While the parent is a bit wrong because they weren’t watching their kid. That is irresponsible and inconsiderate to let them run around the place disturbing everyone else.”
“You are TA because of the following:”
“‘I put my arm out to stop him’”
“Not your child, you should’ve gotten staff involved.”
“‘I also told him I’ll have him wait outside alone if he doesn’t behaves’”
“Even if this is an empty threat, you have no right to make such threats to someone else’s kid. You should’ve told staff about the situation.”
“‘In my mind I was quite calm but apparently I was screaming at the kid’”
“So you basically (possibly) traumatized a kid because you don’t know how to speak to staff or the mother herself? How did you not realize you was screaming at a child?”
“‘He said that we should just let this go for once and that next time the staff will manage the situation before anything happens.’”
“This should’ve happened in this situation but ya know, you never thought to alert staff about this I guess” – DJ_Too_Supreme
“YTA”
“1. You can’t controll yourself but demand self control of a kid”
“2. You were annoyed by a kid reading signs? Really?”
“3. You screamed and threatened a kid”
“4. You can’t assume by yourself that YTA.”
“Edit: i guess the kid was just bored. I on my part entertain kids for a few minutes or talk to them. I also learned how to make ballon animals and i always have ballons with me.”
“Can really recomend that. Kids are happy, parents are relaxed and everyone can have a good time co-excisting. Bc i know what it is like to be stuck in boring enviroments.” – ToeliciousKinks
“This is going to sound off, but I think you need to go talk to someone.”
“If you sincerely and genuinely thought you were talking to anyone, let alone a child, in a calm manner when you were in fact screaming at them?”
“Something sounds off here.”
“It’s a YTA from me, because there’s a few other things you could have done before touching a child that wasn’t yours (arm out to stop him) and yelling at him, but I’m more concerned that you literally didn’t recognize you were yelling.” – WikkidWitchly
“ESH. I see a lot of YTAs but for me, that’s condoning the parent not parenting and letting her kid be disruptive and obnoxious.”
“You should have absolutely gone to management and not tried to handle it yourself, though. Screaming wasn’t okay.” – relinquishing
“Someone’s parents never taught them how to regulate their own emotions huh? YTA” – DubiousDandelion
“YTA – This little anger problem is going to land you in jail. Fix it” – AppleNerdyGirl
“How does someone scream and not know it? Did you black out? I mean honestly, that’s a bit concerning. YTA” – Specific-Scarcity-82
“ESH. The mom shouldn’t have let the child run amok. Ever.”
“On the flip side, you shouldn’t ever yell at a child (no one likes being screamed at-kids have feelings too) or discipline them without express consent of the parents” – Jesster00420
Hopefully the OP gets his anger issues sorted out before leaving college.