It is extremely rude to snoop.
Even if we’ve all been tempted to every so often, respecting the privacy of others is extremely important.
Nor is there anything more frustrating or hurtful than knowing that your privacy has been breached.
Particularly by a family member.
Redditor itsbettertobelucky caught her mother-in-law snooping around her house red-handed multiple times.
Even so, the original poster (OP)’s mother in-law constantly denied any wrongdoing.
This led the OP to concoct a plan to prove her mother-in-law’s guilt.
Worried that she may have gone too far, the OP took to the subReddit “Am I The A**hole” (AITA), where she asked fellow Redditors:
“AITA for setting a glitter trap to catch my mother in law trying to snoop?”
The OP explained how after becoming increasingly frustrated with her mother-in-law’s constant snooping, she finally took matters into her own hands with somewhat drastic measures.
“For some weird reason my mother-in-law [MIL] really wants to go into our bedroom whenever she comes over.”
“On one occasion I followed her as she went upstairs.”
“I was going to get something for my child as the bedrooms are upstairs, and she walked past the bathroom on the main floor and up the stairs behind it.”
“She didn’t hear me and I caught her walking straight into my room and rifling through bills on my dresser.”
“She denied snooping, even though I’d just watched her do it, and said she was just going to use our bathroom because she couldn’t find the other ones.”
“She walked right past the one on the main floor and another one in the upstairs hallway to go into our bedroom.”
“Since that happened, I installed an exterior doorknob that requires a key on our bedroom door and one on the door to our office/spare bedroom.”
“However, she’s still always ‘forgetting’ where the bathroom is and trying the bedroom and office door.”
“This really ticks me off.”
“My husband says that I just get annoyed at this because everything she does drives me crazy and since we’ve put locks on the rooms we don’t want her in, there isn’t really a problem anymore.”
“Well over the holidays we had my in laws over for dinner and before they came I was searching for the bedroom keys.”
“We hadn’t used them in a while since we only lock the doors when MIL comes over.”
“My husband told me we didn’t need to lock the doors since she wouldn’t try to get into the rooms and I insisted that she would because she loves to snoop.”
“We went back and forth and decided to cover the doorknobs in super fine glitter to see if she tried them.”
“I did this once before when husband didn’t believe me about the snooping to prove she’d been in the rooms.”
“Last time she ignored the glitter and we didn’t say anything about it but then my husband couldn’t deny that she’d tried to snoop.”
“So this time I covered the knobs in glitter and for the office went a touch further and rigged a little folder of glitter over the door to the office before the in laws came over. I left it one side unlocked, French doors, and it was set so if you walked in the room you would get covered in glitter.”
“Husband goes out of his way to show his mom the main floor bathroom when they got here and specifically asks his parents and sister not to go upstairs.”
“There’s a baby gate so the kids can’t get upstairs either.”
“Well guess who had to go to the bathroom and got covered in glitter and had it all over their hands and hair?”
“She completely lost it and started screaming at me so I yelled back and now my husband is saying I went too far and I’m the a**hole.”
“MIL also says I’m the a**hole but sister-in-law [SIL] says I didn’t do anything wrong and MIL deserved it for snooping.”
“Father-in-law [FIL] is Switzerland.”
“Apparently her car is ruined now too because it’s covered in glitter that she cant get cleaned up.”
“So AITA?”
Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
The Reddit community agreed that the OP was not the a**hole for setting a glitter trap on her MIL.
Everyone agreed that the OP’s MIIL deserved what she got, after constantly lying about invading her son and the OP’s privacy.
“‘If you didn’t want any glitter on you why did you go into my glitter room?'”
“‘That’s your office!?'”
“‘No, it’s my glitter room’.”
“NTA.”- Hakiki999
“NTA.”
“Why is your husband okay with his mother walking all over your boundaries.”
“Also, the getting caught with glitter on her hands is HILARIOUS, but it’s going to be hard to clean up, for you.”- IndieJones29
“NTA.”
“I had a good laugh at this.”
“I feel like you did a good job leading up to this and were incredibly patient with a boundary stomping MIL.”
“My petty ass doesn’t see this as your fault.”
“I mean sure we know you set a trap for her.”
“But she had been explicitly told time and time again to not go into those rooms.”
“I mean, how were you really supposed to know she would ruin your nice and neat glitter envelope that you worked so hard on and accidentally left on the door of the office.”
“The way I see it she owes you an apology because her recklessness got glitter all over your floors, and you now have to refill your special glitter envelope.”- antonio-bolonio
“NTA.”
“But you have a husband problem as well as a MIL problem.”
“Your husband wants to rug sweep his mom’s snooping, and I’d bet actual money he hid or threw away the keys to the locks just so you couldn’t lock his precious mommy out of your rooms.”-Murky_Advice
“NTA.”
“A brilliant plan!”
“Hard (glittery) evidence that she still tries to get into your bedroom.”
“I’d be tempted to put signs on doors saying [this is not a bathroom’.”- Sleepy_felines
“NTA.”
“But you missed out on the perfect opportunity to spread Disinformation.”
“Make up fun documents to leave ‘hidden’ on your desk about how your helping the UN with a ‘crisis’ or leave out fake letters from heads of state or whoever her favorite famous person is.”
“If she’s gonna snoop have fun with it.”- DeffSkull
“NTA.”
“This is hilarious!”
“There’s no excuse for her behavior acting like she ‘forgot’ where the bathroom is and denying she was snooping when caught red handed.”
“Or glitter handed.”
“Unless she’s suffering from memory loss or dementia, her actions are intentional.”
“I wonder what she’s looking for.”
“So sad about her car.”
“Glitter is a big pain to clean up!”- 666POD
“NTA.”
“But have you considered MIL might have stolen the key?”- Aedronn
“NTA.”
“Pretty self evident who’s the AH here, and it ain’t you.”
“Your ML sounds nuts, and your hubby needs his head examined.”
“Bravo on the sting op though.”
“Well played.”- BalRawk
“NTA.”
“At all.”
“Your MIL should not be allowed back in your house.”
“Could you even believe an apology at this point?”
“She did wrong and continued to lie about it even though she was caught.”
“Then, she has the audacity to climb up un a cross about getting caught by a glitter bomb.”
“And your husband needs to be backing YOU and not your in-laws.”- GodOfMeh
“Absolutely NTA.”
“That is HYSTERICAL!”
“You are my goddamn hero.”- HobbitQueen8
“NTA.”
“Your MIL is an issue but the fact that your husband refuses to set and enforce boundaries with her is actually the larger issue here.”- Hefty_Candidate_4902
“NTA.”
“But, can you ask your husband for me why he is ok with your mother snooping.”
“What is she looking for?”
“How does she think this is acceptable?”
“Did you ask her what exactly she is looking for?”
“This would annoy me so much, how.”- pipmc
The OP later shared an update, revealing that her husband’s perspective shifted a bit after reading the OP’s post, and also shared her plans on how to catch her MIL in the act going forward.
“My husband woke up and found this post and I think the comments have been an eye opener.”
“We are going to start couple’s therapy in January so I think that will be great for us.”
“I will be ordering some cellulose glitter that is biodegradable and safer for future projects.”
“And if she comes over again I will set up a camera haha or at least print out some fun fake documents so if she snoops again she can at least find something interesting.”
It goes without saying that glitter traps provide a mess which no one wants to clean up.
However, it’s hard not to agree with the OP that had her MIL not snooped where she didn’t belong, that whole mess could have been avoided.
One can only hope that the OP’s MIL learned her lesson, and this has put an end to her snooping days.