Two years after the incident itself, one man turned to Reddit to process a wild experience in a Japanese bath house. A backpacker traveling through the country at the time, the language barrier and some spot-on paranoia all combined to create a deeply uncomfortable sauna outing.
kawaicafe, as he’s known on Reddit, relived the whole ordeal with a post on the “Today I F***ed Up (TIFU)” (TIFU) subReddit. Yes, the forum is that simple.
People explain a time they severely screwed up, much to the laughing pleasure of the Reddit community.
For kawaicafe, it all began with his preference for baths over showers.
“This happened two years back, still haunts me to this day.”
“I was travelling alone in Japan as a backpacker and going from town to town. I knew onsen (hot spring bath) were a thing and very much enjoyed going to them as they were extremely cheap and I enjoyed baths much more than I enjoyed the showers in the hostels.
“And with that I tried going to as many onsen as I could.”
When he got a tip for a bathing emporium, he jumped at the chance for some multi-story steaming.
“One day one of the hostel staff i was staying at (in Osaka) mentioned the existence of ‘Spa World’ an onsen on 5 different stories. Obviously I was extremely pumped and directly headed there as it wasn’t too far away. I only took a very small towel as is customary in onsens.”
“At this point I also think it’s necessary to mention that men and women do not bathe together in the same rooms or baths.”
Quickly upon entering the newly discovered “world,” he noticed one detail awry.
“Upon arrival I got completely naked and headed to the many baths present in Spa world. As I went from bath to bath I started feeling uneasy as i thought some random guy was staring at me.”
“I was the only non-Asian person present so i thought it might just be because of that.”
He devised a plan to sniff him out.
“But even with me thinking that i started to feel really uneasy so I decided to go to the sauna room thinking, ‘If i go in there and that person also comes in I’ll at least be sure that he is following me, but other people will be in the sauna so it’s fine, what’s the worst that can happen…’ “
“And with that I made my way into the sauna, around 5 men were present in the sauna so I was feeling quite reassured, and as I sat down next to one of them the person whom I thought was following me indeed entered.”
“I felt quite uncomfortable, but other people were there so it was fine. But as he sat down literally all the other men took their leave, and with that my stalker and I were alone in the sauna.”
With the departure of those other bathers, things had taken a turn.
“In a matter of seconds he got very close to me and started small talk, he was struggling with English but he tried his best so I just answered to be polite.”
“And then after asking me where I came from he asked me out of the blue if he could see my genitals that were covered by my small towel.”
He then made some logical leaps, the kinds of thought moves that only hindsight can see clearly.
“At that moment I got quite concerned but the stupid innocent me thought he was just wondering what a European d*** might look like, which would be understandable, and with that my extremely stupid younger-self took away his towel for a brief moment to show his d***.”
“After seeing that, my stalker immediately asked me if he could touch it. That was finally the moment that I snapped and directly said no while putting back my towel on my genitals.”
Then, a discovery.
“He asked why I wouldn’t let him touch it and I just told him that I wasn’t interested and wasn’t gay. That’s when he told me that this specific sauna was actually a meet-up place for gays. I started getting extremely uneasy and got up to leave.”
But it didn’t end there. The new enlightenment was interrupted by a sudden parting blow.
“And as I left my stalker CLAPPED my a** so hard that his hand was engraved on my butt for a while.”
“In the end I left as quickly as possible and have never been to a sauna ever since.”
Redditors, right on cue, offered a barrage of jokes and hot takes. A few highlighted a concerning flaw within his anecdote.
“Yea spaworld is a world famous tourist destination. Not a gay sauna. You just got assaulted.” — Chimie45
“Uh, I’ve been to spa world in Osaka a bunch of times over the years. There’s no gay sauna there and that guy was just a pervert trying his chances.” — rdrkt
“Spa world isn’t a gay sauna, you just got regular molested” — GravityTxT
Others highlighted the part of the story they just couldn’t get past.
“I’m sorry this happened to you, but holy sh** thinking that he was interested in what a European dick looked like is hilarious” — DemiGod9
“Incredibly odd to just show a dude your dick to be polite” — bumdrunk
“I just love that you showed him. I probably would have too. Like, it would be rude to refuse.” — boogs_23
Some really thought it was all about that slap.
“I was not expecting the clap on the ass topping out this story.” — MiniMeowl
“Dude clapped your a** so hard, next thing you knew, you were back in Lumbridge” — Ricewind1
“Slapped you with his hand right?” — Gisgiii
“Wait clapped or slapped your a**. Each word has its own meaning lmaoo” — S550MustangGT
Finally, some people took issue with the idea that a room label makes everything on limits.
“I’m sorry this happened to you. No matter your sexuality, if you tell someone you don’t want to be touched and they still do it’s sh**.” — WhereIsMyCuddlyBear
“Even if it were a gay sauna it doesn’t mean you consent to being touched just by being there. What a creep.” — YouWantALime
“I’m sorry you got sexually assaulted. It was not your fault. And even if it would have been a gay sauna or another place where people meet up to have sex, his behavior was still not okay.” — Gayandfluffy
“Bro this is the gay sauna. If you come in here you have to be gay. You’re already here so you must be gay. C’mon bro. BRO WHERE ARE YOU GOING?” — KDawG888
While some of those comments may have helped kawaicafe accept and move on, clearly two years’ time has not done the trick.
To close, one comment captured the dynamics of such a permanent, lingering memory.
“This went to the cringe collection for when you’re trying to sleep right?” — YesIreadDoujinshi