Proper parenting is typically something we think of as being a job for adults, but every now and then it’s the children bringing a bit of wisdom to the table.
A 46-year-old Redditor going by the name “daughterpiercings” asked for people’s thoughts after his 13-year old son sharply criticized a parental decision he and his wife made.
The man decided to ask the AITA (“Am I The A**hole?”) subReddit:
“AITA for kicking out my daughter because she got pierced?”
Before we get into his full story or how Reddit responded, let’s talk about how the AITA subReddit works.
The original poster (OP) tells their story as a post, ending by asking if they were the one in the wrong. Other users share their thoughts in the comments, then cast their votes.
Voting options are:
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Now that you know how things work, let’s get back to the OP’s story.
“Hi all. My daughter (18) has been making reckless decisions and overall hasn’t focused on school and anything important for the past few years.”
“I’ve lashed out at her a few times, but overall tolerated her behavior because she is my daughter and I love her.”
“However, she just never learns. Apparently she got her nipples pierced on her 18th birthday (almost a year ago) without asking my wife or me or without even mentioning something.”
“My wife and I found out this morning when my wife accidentally saw them while our daughter was showering. She needed something from the bathroom.”
“My daughter handed it to her and that is when my wife saw the piercings. We confronted her at lunch and told her that it was a very stupid thing to do.”
“I told her I can accept piercings on the ears and maybe even on the nose because they’re somewhat pretty, but the ones on the nipples are ugly and overall dangerous to get due to infections.”
“She’s been like that for a while and even got tattoos when she was 17 (very small ones, with permission) because she told us if we don’t let her get them now she will just get them once she is 18.”
“I guess that once she turned 18, she’s even more determined to mess with us and keep rebelling or whatever she’s doing.”
“She didn’t say much during the whole argument except tell us that she knows the dangers that come with having these piercings, which I think is bull based on her reaction when I mentioned that.”
“In the end, I told her that since she has no respect for me or my wife, once she graduates (which is this year), she has to leave. My wife agreed with me, however my son (13) says it’s too harsh of a punishment.”
Reddit was very clear with this man.
“She’s had them for a year! So clearly she took care of them and they don’t bother anyone.”
“‘why are you so obsessed with your daughter’s tits’. YTA” – Apprehensive_Jelly42
“I absolutely hate the ‘respect your parents’ BS. Parents mainly use it to control their kids.”
“Yes, kids should have respect but what about a parents respect for their kids feelings/opinions/wants? Where does it end?”
“And OP thinks this is disrespect because he personally doesn’t like nipple piercings?? Ew. YTA 100%” – Nuggy303
“It’s interesting that OP has demonized his ADULT daughter’s choices (‘making reckless decisions’ ‘hasn’t focused on anything important’) and her right to make decisions about her own body- but somehow gives weight to his 13 year old son’s opinion on his parenting?”
“I’m curious what his daughter’s other ‘bad decisions’ are. I’d wager that they aren’t bad or dangerous, just things that OP doesn’t agree with.”
“The double standard for daughters is f*cked up! Reeks of sexism. YTA.” – redalmondnails
“Also, why the hell does he need to find her piercings pretty (the nose piercing comment)? I hate when daughters are objectified like that.”
“Women are not born to sit pretty on a shelf for men to look at and admire. This sort of attitude is so harmful to girls and women.”
“I got my second ear piercings and my cartridge done in grade 9 cause that is the age of consent for piercings. My dad didn’t like it and voiced his opinions but he wouldn’t dare punish me, let alone threaten to kick me out at 18.”
“What a horrible power-tripping dad the OP is. Wildly YTA.” – iknowshtall
“Of course she didn’t ask her parents if she could pierce her nipples, cause she’s an adult and they’re her nipples. YTA” – GlaxenFlux
“Also why were they having the ‘consequences for getting nipples pierced’ discussion in front of her 13 year old brother? Why does he need to know about his sister’s nipple piercings?” – ReasonableFig2111
“YTA for being obsessed with your daughters body and what she does with it.”
“What does you thinking nipple piercing is ugly have to do with her choice to get them pierced? Why is it important to you that you think your daughter’s nipples look attractive to you?” – cleancutpunk