Even though marijuana, both medicinal and recreational, is now legal in most parts of the country, it remains a fairly contentious issue.
Many people still simply look down upon it as a drug and nothing else, and tend to judge those who use it.
Particularly those who use it recreationally.
Redditor Key-Star8694 was perturbed that their neighbor would openly smoke marijuana on his front porch or front lawn, often in front of their children.
This resulted in the original poster (OP) eventually taking matters into their own hands.
But concerned that they may have been out of line, the OP took tot he subReddit “Am I The A**Hole” (AITA), where they asked fellow Redditors:
“AITA because I asked my neighbor to stop smoking weed in front of my kids?”
The OP first explained how they don’t necessarily have a problem with people smoking marijuana, but more the manner in which some people do so, particularly their neighbor.
“I know this is going to get some backlash because lots of people on Reddit think weed is a miracle plant.”
“I have nothing against weed and I voted for its legalization in my state.”
“I live on an avenue in a mid sized city.”
“Houses lined up and down the streets.”
“The kind of neighborhood where kids play basketball and hockey in the street.”
“My neighbor is a single guy in his mid 50’s.”
“He reminds me of Dale Gribble from King of the hill but he smokes joints instead of cigarettes.”
“I’m talking Snoop Dogg levels of joints.”
“I have no problem with you smoking weed in your backyard or in privacy but this guy will smoke joints and talk with the neighborhood kids.”
“This is not on his property.”
“The kids will be shooting hoops in the street and he will be talking with them while smoking.”
But it became too much for the OP when their neighbor started smoking marijuana in front of their own children, and immediately erred his grievances to their neighbor.
“My kids started asking me why ‘Mr. Tony’ is always smoking those smelly cigarettes.”
“I was in my front yard when I saw him sitting on his front stoop smoking and showing my son a red solo cup with a small pot plant in it.”
“It kind of made me mad.”
“Next time I saw him I asked him if he would mind not smoking in front of my kids.”
“I didn’t think this was a huge request but now the guy wants nothing to do with me.”
“He used to help me mow this shared swath of lawn and now he mows it exactly at his property line and avoids eye contact.”
“I have nothing against marijuana at all but I don’t think it’s crazy to not want kids exposed to it.”
“These are like 8 to 12 year as well.”
“Am I being a jerk here?”
Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation by declaring:
- NTA – Not the A**hole
- YTA – You’re the A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everybody Sucks Here
The Reddit community was fairly divided as to where they believed the OP fell in asking their neighbor not to smoke.
While most agreed that the OP had every right to ask their neighbor not to smoke marijuana in front of their children, some felt that their neighbor also had every legal right to smoke, and was likewise entitled to their subsequent behavior.
“I think it’s reasonable that he gets to smoke wherever it’s legal to do so.”
“I think it’s reasonable for you to want your children to not be exposed to second hand smoke, pot or otherwise.”
“I think it’s reasonable that you are the person who should decide how the topic of recreational use of weed is brought to your kids, so depending on the content of his discussion with your son over the pot plant.”
“He could be crossing a line here.”
“From here I would apply my parenting rule of thumb.”
“We should err on the side of contextualizing the world around our children as opposed to isolating them from it.”
“So, to me the most direct course of action to avoid something I think is harmful would be to simply direct your children not to talk to him and explain why.”
“Asking someone to not smoke around the kids could be considered rude, depending on the delivery, but not overly so.”
However it’s not my first choice since it leans toward isolating rather than contextualizing.”-NobodyEspeciallyCool.
“He doesn’t want to worry about upsetting you anymore so he’s gone into grey rock neighbor mode.”
“At least he won’t be smoking in front of your kids.”- Shitsuri.
“NTA But don’t expect him to do your yard work either lol.”- ItsBridger.
“But you probably pissed your neighbor off and now, you’ll never get a favor from him ever again.”-Xenafan1970.
“I don’t see a problem with not wanting secondhand smoke around kids.”-popcat67.
“It’s not like you’re judging him for smoking weed, you just don’t want your small children exposed to it.”-Hemenucha.
“I smoke like Snoop Dogg levels of joints, but I wouldn’t do it around kids in public unless I knew their parents were OK with it.”
“You asked him to stop, and he stopped, correct? “
“So what’s the problem?”
“That he’s not mowing your lawn anymore?”
“Maybe get to know the guy a little before you judge him.”
“It’s unlikely that he’s a danger to your kids.”
“It’s possible that he smokes so much in order to deal with chronic pain or some other condition.”
“Let your kids know that it’s a plant for adults and that some people use it as a medicine.”-RaisinToastie.
“NAH he’s allowed to do what he wants your allowed to ask that he not engage with your kids.”
“If you’re worried you hurt his feelings then perhaps talk to him.”-Quilting_and_crafts.
“Not an unreasonable ask, although I’d argue education on drugs is better than avoidance.”
“So while I agree direct exposure isn’t always the best, it would probably be better to just explain to your kids what it is exactly.”
“He’s definitely being petty, but depending on how you approached the conversation you could have easily come off as offensive or painted him like a villain.”
“He didn’t technically do anything wrong by smoking/showing plants to your kids on his property at the end of the day and if you presented it as such then that could easily get misunderstood.”-Hoppypoppy21.
“And I say that as someone who certainly enjoys the devil’s lettuce in my good christian suburbs.”
“You don’t smoke around kids.”
“I don’t care if it’s a pipe, a cigar, a cigarette or pot.”
It’s a crappy thing to do because it’s terrible for their health, and it stinks.”-Euphoric-Round-5182.
“NTA it’s weird he’s showing kids his plants and smoking in the street.”
“Yeah it legal but it’s weird.”
“I smoke like snoop will be proud but I don’t go out on the street with it.”
“On his porch?”
“Walking up to kids playing sports as a grown ass dude and showing them your joint? “
“It would be weird with beer too.”
“I’m a heavy cig smoker (2 packs a day so about 50 cigs) I try not to smoke around kids.”
“I’ll smoke where I want too but I won’t take my cig and go over to young kids and say hi.
“There’s a big difference between having a beer on your porch and waltzing down the street with it and the cops agree.”-Bens_den_of_thoughts.
Others, though, were less sympathetic towards the OP, finding them to be clearly biased against marijuana, and could have handled the situation much better than they did.
“I guess I’m confused because you say over and over again you are ‘cool’ with it and you voted to legalize.”
“However, if it should be legal, then it would be no different than him sitting outside his house having a beer and talking to the kids.”
“The only harmful angle I’m seeing here is second hand smoke, which I could get behind.”
“Problem is, concern for the kids’ health due to second hand smoke is nowhere in your post.”
“In fact, what you DID include was ‘Snoop dogg level joints’,Cringe, that’s a stereotypical bias’.”
“‘That he was single, how is this relevant?”
“And that you’re like sOoOoO cool with it’.”
“Also, you’re a parent.”
“If your kids are asking about the ‘smelly cigarettes’, it’s a TEACHABLE MOMENT.”
“Just take that time to explain the plant, and using it responsibly.”
“Shielding them from it and making it a taboo subject only makes things worse in so many ways.”
“I’m going with YTA, because the reason you’re upset has to do with a bias against the plant.”
“You sound distrustful of this dude for no other reason than he smokes weed, and I think that makes you an a**hole.”-moonfae12.
It’s completely understandable for a parent to want to be protective of their children.
But as long as other people aren’t harming others, how they live their lives shouldn’t be anyone else’s business.
So as long as the OP’s neighbor isn’t bringing harm to their children, it might be in their best interest to just let them live their life however they so choose.