For people that live in apartments, the neighbors are mere feet away.
When those neighbors are no more than acquaintances, or even complete strangers, thin walls and tiny distances force people to be intentional about how they behave at home.
That can be a balancing act.
Nobody wants to live in constant anxiety in their own home, but it’s also important to be respectful.
For one Redditor, that balancing act proved complicated. She posted her experience to the “Am I the A**hole (AITA)” subReddit.
The Original Poster (OP), who goes by Zoesdog on the site, used a blunt title for the post.
“AITA for being naked in my own apartment?”
OP began her story with the prevalent details.
“Ok so hear me out.”
“I live in an apartment with floor to ceiling windows and a balcony. My neighbors have the same.”
“Our balconies are close but not touching, like if we wanted to standing against our own railing we could very easily hug without leaning over too horribly far.”
With that said when standing on our balconies we can see into each others’ living rooms easily. My neighbors are a couple about my age (20s or 30s). Now my situation.”
Then divulged a habit of hers.
‘I live alone with my dog and cat. After I shower I sit on my couch and lotion up because water softeners don’t exist in this apartment apparently.”
“I also watch TV while doing this and like, just like chilling naked in my apartment.”
Eventually, that tendency impacted life outside her home.
“One day the boyfriend neighbor was on his balcony while I was on my couch and I didn’t notice for a bit till I turned around and saw him.”
“As far as I’m aware he was working on their grill and trying not to look at me.”
“The girlfriend came out onto the balcony and what could have been an awkward ‘oop, sorry, I’m going to get dressed in my room now and we will pretend this never happened’ turned into a fight on their end.”
“I did get dressed in my room and I didn’t hear their fight after they shut their balcony door.”
And the ordeal didn’t end with there.
“About 2 days later I was walking my dog when I ran into the girlfriend in the hall going the opposite way. She told me something like ‘you should be more aware of your neighbors’.”
“And ‘maybe you shouldn’t be naked out in the open’. I apologized and kept walking my dog. (This was also the first time we’ve talked in a year).”
But OP learned the strong hold that habits exert on us.
“So, for like a week I got dressed before coming out into my living room but the need for hydrated skin outweighed my concern of prying eyes and I started going back to what I’ve done for a year.”
“So, on the one hand, him staring at me is their problem and a perverted thing to do.”
“On the other I am aware of how exposed I am and have been asked to not be naked and expose myself like I am.”
“Should I just suck it up and lotion in the silence of my room or keep doing what I’m doing?”
Anonymous strangers on the internet were asked to provide feedback by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
- NAH – No A**holes Here
OP didn’t receive much support in the comments to her post.
Many pointed out a solution they felt was glaringly obvious.
“YTA. Buy some drapes. They cost about $25 at Walmart.” — ElegantAnt
“My question, as when this always comes up, is can you just get curtains?” — HellblazerHawk
“What the heck is up with people not putting curtains on?? YTA, just buy so damn drapes.” — dxlliris
One Redditor offered an innovative solution.
“Just get glass film on your windows you can see out and still get sunlight but nobody can see inside.” — Nik7cole
A couple responses did step in to defend OP.
“Quit victim-blaming OP. NTA. They can be nekkid in their own apartment if they want.”
“If their neighbors can’t mind their own business, and eyes, that sounds like a them problem.” — GardeniaPhoenix
“NTA. Ain’t nothing wrong with the human body. If it makes them uncomfortable that’s their issue and an easy fix is to not look into other people’s apartments.” — Prune-Potential
But most Redditors offered a mixture of support and criticism.
“So you are definitely allowed to be naked in your apartment but I am gonna have to go with YTA for choose to be naked somewhere you acknowledge people can see you.”
“I am often naked in my house, but when I am I don’t go stand in front of the windows or go into my living room as it has a large window that directly faces my neighbors house” — ackayak
“I mean, yeah, YTA. It’s your home, but you know that they can see you very easily. Just buy something to block their view, it’s not that hard.” — Maauve91
“This is really a difficult one because you are allowed to be naked in your own home but at the same time you know they’re there and being in an apartment with close neighbors makes it more complicated.”
“If it was you in your own like house house then I would say n t a, but I’m gonna have to go with YTA. When you live in an apartment there’s more moral rules that you have to think of.” — ToxicDollhouse
“At least close the blinds? You can be nude in your own apartment, but there is an expectation of ‘not visible by those outside of the home.'”
“Gentle YTA for that. You can lotion up naked, just close the blinds first.” — partofbreakfast
We’ll never knew whether OP took these comments to heart and bought curtains or privacy film for her windows, or if she said damn the torpedoes—and the windows—and kept on lotioning up in the nude in her living room.