Navigating workplace relationships is difficult enough under normal circumstances. But when your boss starts hitting on you, things can get real weird, real fast.
A Redditor found himself in this situation when his boss put the moves on him during a business trip. Unsure about how he handled it, he went to the AITA (Am I The A**hole) subReddit for some perspective and input.
The Original Poster (OP), who goes by snackmaster2000 on the site, asked:
“AITA for going to HR?”
“my boss (46F[emale]) asked me (36m[ale]) to join her for a meeting In a city three hours away. I had done one of these trips with her before, however it was on my schedule week prior.”
“In this case I was given less than one days notice and was a little annoyed since I had not planned on this, and I’d be missing a day of work. However since she’s my boss, I didn’t really look at it as an option and I joined her on the trip.”
“As we were chatting on the drive down, she mentioned that she will have to manage a different team at some point because she has a conflict of interest with our team. I wasn’t sure what it meant but I didn’t ask and we moved on.”
“The meeting went fine, however on the drive home she said ‘remember when I said I had a conflict of interest in managing this team? I’m not sure if it’s just the lock down making me crazy, but since we’ve been working together I’ve started to feel a really strong connection towards you and very strong attraction, And I wonder if you are feeling it too or if it’s just me?'”
“I nervously laughed and told her that’s flattering but I have a girlfriend (she’s also married) and she then told me ‘thanks for giving me the answers I needed’. We sat in extremely awkward silence for a while, and she said y’ou know what, forget I said anything, erase it from your memory’.”
“I told her ‘I’m not gonna lie, this is very uncomfortable, and we still have to sit in this car for an hour’ She said she could cancel our one on one meetings moving forward if that would make me more comfortable, and asked me what we should do. I told her ‘do what you need to do, but I’m not a part of this conversation.'”
“She ask me again please not to tell anyone we work with, and said if I decide to go to HR to let her know so she can be ready. I said I didn’t want to do that because I don’t want drama at work. We sat in very awkward silence for an hour, until we finally got back to her place and I got my car and drove home.”
“I wasn’t sure how to move forward, how I was going to face her the following week and pretend nothing happened? I got lots of advice over the weekend, consensus was go to HR on Monday. Monday morning, before I even spoke to HR, she sent a message to our team saying ‘something came up, and I will need to take a week off to adres personal matters’.”
“She’s never done this, I assumed it was about me. At that point I went to HR and told everything that happened.”
“My boss was placed on leave for 3 weeks while I was transitioned to a new team.”