It’s always devastating to lose a loved one.
In addition to grief and the emotional toll it takes, there are several unpleasantries that accompany a death.
Namely, the will and dividing the estate.
While many people might find themselves financially benefiting from a will, it can just as easily divide a family when it is revealed who inherited what.
Redditor HubbarG thought that the division of their grandfather’s estate was dealt with fairly easily and conflict-free between their sister, their cousin, and themself.
Until the original poster (OP)’s sister discovered what they were planning on doing with their portion of the estate, and made no attempt to hide their dissatisfaction.
Wondering if they had done anything wrong, the OP took to the subReddit “Am I The A**hole” (AITA), where they asked fellow Redditors:
“AITA for turning the home I inherited into an Airbnb? My sister thought it would be a ‘family home’ forever.”
The OP explained the necessary measures needed to sustain their portion of their grandfather’s estate, which their sister was not on board with one bit.
“About six months or so ago my grandpa died.”
“For simplicity’s sake, let’s say his estate is worth about $1.5 million.”
“In his will, he said that me, my sister, and my cousin each get 1/3 share.”
“His estate was basically two cash amounts and the other share was his beach home in California.”
“Basically the oldest got to pick which they wanted, the second oldest and the youngest which was me.”
“I got the beach house, my sister and cousin got $500k.”
“For the last six months I’ve allowed my sister to stay in the house whenever she likes but I just got my first tax bill and I either have to sell it or start making some income off it.”
“After talking to the real estate agent I’ve decided the best course of action is to put it on Airbnb.”
“That way I can still use it if I like, but sister can pay me to use it if she still wants to go there, basically there’s not someone renting full-time.”
“My sister is furious with me for so many reasons.”
“First of all I know she’s upset because she can no longer use the house for free.”
“But she’s also telling me that I basically becoming a rent seeking capitalist who is going to ruin the neighborhood which has been a total classic surf neighborhood since the 1950s.”
“She has written me angry email after angry email after angry email calling me all sorts of names.”
“She also says it’s not fair because her inheritance is gone for her debts but I still make money from mine, and that if she had chosen the house I could stay there any time I want.”
“She’s my older sister and I’ve always been impressionable to the things she says to me and I’m feeling a lot of guilt and shame for what she told me.”
“Am I the a**hole here?”
Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation by declaring:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
The Reddit community agreed that the OP was not the a**hole for wanting to turn their grandfather’s beach house into an Airbnb.
Everyone agreed that the OP’s sister was in no place to argue with them about their decision, as they could have chosen the house over the money, nor should she have expected the OP to lend them the house for free whenever she wanted it.
“If she really had half a million in debt she wouldn’t have been able to keep the house long enough for you to stay over.”
“You’ve done nothing wrong and she’s just upset you putting the house up on Airbnb is inconveniencing her.”
“NTA.”- Devourer_of_felines
“NTA.”
“Did you tell her you can’t afford to keep the house unless you do this?”
“I think she is being selfish.”
“You didn’t get to choose what you wanted, so she got 500k cash and you got a home.”
“It’s not your fault she already used all the money.”- wishingonmars
“SO NTA.”
“Your sister had a choice whether to take the house or the money AND she had a choice how to handle her money.”
“Half a million in debts, how’d she do that?”
“You have done NOTHING wrong, and better it be an airbnb than it be lost to the family forever because you can’t keep it due to the taxes.”
“Tell your sister to take a hike, and that you expect her to share anything she bought with her 500k with you if she thinks she still deserves free access to the house.”- peithecelt
“NTA.”
“She’s welcome to either rent it or buy it off you with that 500k she now has.”
“She even had the option to pick it and she herself thinks money is more important.”
“Of course, you’re feeling guilty, that’s what a GUILT TRIP is supposed to do to its victim!”
“Your sister is 100000000000000000000000% in the wrong here.”- countrylemon
“NTA.”
“Your house, do with it as you please.”
“You’re not telling her what to do with her inheritance, don’t let her tell you what to do with yours.”-spiffymofo
“So the sister calculated that if she took the money instead of the house, she’d have the money AND the house whenever she wanted.”
“And now she’s upset that she’s only going to have access to the house sometimes.”
“It’s your house, just like the other inheritance was her money.”
“Unless you demanded unlimited use of her money, she’s just being pissy.”
“Also, being upset that her inheritance is gone but you still have yours has to be the worst argument I’ve ever heard.”
“She could have invested the money, or bought a beach house.”- McFeely_Smackup
“NTA.”
“She should have chosen the house.”- StopDoingThisAgain
“NTA.”
“She could have chosen the house.”
“She didn’t. It’s yours to do as you wish.”
“End of story.”- MightyMary007
“NTA.”
“Dude.”
“Your sister and cousin each got 500k, and they want you to SPEND money so they can have a vacation home as your share of the estate?”
“That’s absurd.”
“Don’t listen to your sister.”- Gigafoodtree
“NTA.”
“Your sister is an idiot for calling you ‘a rent-seeking capitalist’, does she think property taxes pay themselves?”- RamblingManUK
“NTA.”
“You all got your share of the assets.”
“It’s yours, not the families.”
“Your share of the assets, however, has some costs that you have to bear.”
“If that asset has the ability to generate some income to cover those costs, great.”
“If it has the ability to generate income to cover those costs and more, even better.”
“If she doesn’t like the idea, then you should offer to let her buy a portion of the house, and take responsibility to pay some of those costs, and she would then have a say in how the house is used.”
“I think the real issue here is that she’s pissed you’re going to have an income stream in the future and she’s got nothing.”
“What she doesn’t understand is that her ‘income stream’ is the money that she would have been paying towards her debts that were erased with her inheritance.”
“She took the immediate benefit.”
“You got one that provides a long-term benefit.”
“No, you’re not the a**hole.”
“She is.”
“Let me be clear, I said he should offer to let her buy-in but she’s have to do at the current market rate, not for what he got it for.”
“And honestly, I wouldn’t really suggest that.”
“My real thought is ‘you got yours, I got mine’.”
“Pound sand’.”
“But I was trying to be polite.”- AuditorTux
“NTA.”
“Your sister should have chosen the house if it meant so much to her.”- FighterWoman
“NTA.”
“Your sister got to pick first, if preserving the family home was so important to her, she should have chosen that over the $500k.”- milee30
“NTA.”
“Bwahahaha, you’re a capitalist because you are going to make money on the property?”
“What did she do with her $500K?”
“Give it to the communists?”
“She’s pissed because you cut off the gravy train.”
“From her point of view, she got all that dank cash and she got the house when she wants to use it, but not pay for it, too.”- GoodPumpkin5
“NTA.”
“She chose first and could have picked the house.”
“She chose cash because she assumed she could have her cake and eat it too.”
“Get the cash but still use the house anytime she wanted.”
“Also she certainly doesn’t seem willing to pitch in on taxes so that you wouldn’t have to rent it out.”
“Tell her every negative word she says about it will increase the rate she has to pay to stay there.”-vodka_philosophy
One can only hope that grief may have been affecting the emotions of the OP’s sister.
Hopefully, after some reflection, she might realize that the OP’s decisions are paramount to keeping their grandfather’s beach house in their family.
And will then give the OP the apology they deserve.