Everyone needs a vacation now and then.
And every couple needs alone time…
Having roommates can be a burden when trying to figure out these issues.
But, sometimes, the roommate isn’t the issue.
Redditor Late-Draw6941 wanted to discuss his experience and get some feedback, so naturally, he came to the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subreddit.
He asked:
“AITA for not leaving the house for a week that I rent so my roommates can have a staycation?”
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
“Hello, AITA (M[ale] 30) for not giving my Roommates the house to themselves for a week.”
“We are all on the lease, and this is their first time living on their own.”
“They want me to leave for a full week and stay at their parents’ house so they can have a staycation and enjoy being a married couple living together for the first time without family.”
“Their kids would be at their grandparents.”
“I think it’s unreasonable since I pay for rent, but they tell me I’m being selfish.”
“I also don’t really know their parents, and it makes me uncomfortable.”
The OP was left to wonder:
“So… AITA?”
Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed some options to the question AITA:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Many Redditors declared OP was NOT the A**hole.
“NTA. It’s wild that they would even ask you to do that.”
“How about they go rent a cute little hotel room for a week and play house there ?”
“You shouldn’t have to leave your home – period.” ~ kristin_dianne
“Absolutely wild! Like, just the audacity of even asking is astounding.”
“No, if you want to spend a week together without anybody else, you’re going to go rent a place to stay.”
“You’re not even going to suggest that somebody who pays to live somewhere leave for a week so you can bang in every room.”
“At the absolute worst, they could suggest that they pay for OP to stay in a nice hotel for the week, but if they’re going to do that, why wouldn’t they stay in the nice hotel?” ~ haleorshine
“This is a good point.”
“The craziest thing out of all of this is assuming that op will go stay with the couple’s parents, who OP has never even met.”
“Like that’s so bizarre and random.”
“Can you imagine being married and calling your mom to say, ‘Hey, we want to pretend we have our own house with no roommates, so we’re gonna send our roommate to your place for a week, cool?’”
“Like what the actual f**k 😭.” ~ treehuggerfroglover
“NTA, maybe it’s time for them to find a place by themselves?”
“Or they could stop being cheap and pay to go and stay at a hotel like normal people wanting a ‘staycation.'”
“But their request is very strange considering you’re all on the lease.” ~ No_Calligrapher_2726
“They absolutely shouldn’t be living with a housemate if this is how they’re going to behave.”
“Also, OP should be looking to move out anyway, because this is so wild it’s definitely going to get worse.” ~ haleorshine
“Exactly. if they want the full ‘just us’ experience, they should be the ones to find a temporary place, not kick out a paying roommate.”
“A staycation shouldn’t come at someone else’s expense, especially when that someone is literally helping pay for the place they want to take over.” ~ OkDaikon1694
“NTA. So they are asking you to stay at their parent’s place?”
“The parents who are also looking after their Grandchildren for the week?”
“So you would be helping with the childcare?”
“Nope, they want to enjoy married life without others around, then they should get a place they aren’t sharing.” ~ Mishy162
“NTA. I’d give them three choices…”
“They can deal with you there because you are paying rent…”
“They can pay for you to stay in a great hotel with a spa package, or they can go stay in that same great hotel.” ~ LowBalance4404
“NTA. Wait – they have kids?”
“How long have they been together?”
“And they have never spent a week alone together?”
“This isn’t your problem, but I imagine it’s going to get awkward during that week if the kids are away…” ~ alien_overlord_1001
“This is bonkers.”
“If they want the full use of the house, they can offer to, at a minimum, pay your rent for that week. NTA.” ~ staygoldsodapop
“NTA. If for some reason you DO let them have the house for a week, make sure all of YOUR belongings are put into your room and LOCK your room.”
“I’d even go as far as having cameras in your room while you’re gone.”
“Maybe I’ve read too many fanfiction and romance novels where what I’m about to say is a theme, but ‘enjoying being a married couple living together for the first time without family’ screams ‘we plan to [do the deed] on every potential surface throughout ‘our’ home to ‘christen’ the house’ to me.”
“I know I wouldn’t like to come home and find that my bed/desk/dresser/etc… was used for another couple to have been ‘gettin’ it on’ on.” ~ ToriBethATX
“I would be more concerned that in that week they decide they like their own room, move the roommate out of their room, and put their kids stuff in the roommates room and suggesting that the roommate continue to stay with their parents.”
“This situation is so ridiculously selfish I just wouldn’t put anything off the table.”
“NTA, by the way.” ~ CocoaBleu
“They should use that ‘staycation’ week to look for better jobs so they can afford to live on their own.”
“TF????? Definitely NTA.” ~ Thin_Firefighter6739
“They can’t afford to split an apartment by themselves.”
“So they need your share.”
“But you don’t get to use it.”
“And have to pay more money to find an alternate spot.”
“They can figure out how to shell out cash for a hotel night away.”
“You decide when to go away.”
“Then it’s a gift to them, but not before. NTA.” ~ Snackinpenguin
“NTA. That’s an unreasonable ask of you.”
“If they want a staycation as a married couple, then they can find a local hotel to stay at.”
“This is the cost of having roommates.” ~ Advanced_Cranberry_4
“Tell them to do what married couples do and get an Airbnb.”
“Or they can pay for your hotel room for a week (Hotel, not a Motel).”
“Otherwise it’s your house too, you pay the rent and you’re on the lease, your butt is staying put! NTA.” ~ GardenSafe8519
“NTA. Jesus, the only thing worse than living with roommates is living with roommates who are f**king married and have kids, LOL.”
“You pay your portion of the rent, it means you’re entitled to the house plain and simple.”
“If they want some alone time without their kids, nothing’s stopping them from renting a hotel room for the week.”
“Better yet, tell them you’re down for it if they pay you for a week’s stay at a hotel.” ~ Chewbacca319
“NTA. They have kids, and they’re married with a roommate?”
“Sounds like they need to book a hotel.”
“What a wild thing to say to someone.”
“Time to move.” ~ imf4rds
“NTA. They have no right to kick you out of your house that you help pay rent for so they can be alone.”
“And for the record, they don’t really live on their own, do they, since they have a roommate(you). You shouldn’t have to leave so they can be alone.”
“They should have thought of that before.”
“Tell them to get an Airbnb for a week.” ~ Mistress_Lily1
“Absolutely not, and it’s absolutely bonkers that she even asked that.”
“You pay rent there, she can take a vacation somewhere else or she can accept that she lives with roommates and she doesn’t get to throw them out just because she wants the house quiet for a week.”
“What entitlement!” ~ Puzzleheaded_Gear622
“NTA, that’s so weird! “
“Why in the hell would you want to stay with their parents?”
“Awkward!!!”
“If they want to spend time, they can get a hotel for you or themselves, but you’re not paying.”
“Hell no, their staycation is not your problem, but theirs, you aren’t going nowhere.” ~ redhead21886
“NTA. This is a weird, absolute no.”
“They want you to stay with THEIR parents?”
“That’s rough.”
“The only way this works is if they pay for a decent hotel room for you or something like that.”
“I can see why they would want this, but I can’t see at all why they think it’s reasonable to ask.” ~ BigMax
“Wow, I thought for sure it was a typo when you said stay at ‘their parents house’ – I thought for sure they had to be asking you to stay at your own parents house.”
“They want you to stay for a week with THEIR parents?”
“Lmfao, hell no. Hellllll no.”
“NTA. If they want a week to be a married couple, they can get a hotel.”
“Or they could pay for you to get a hotel.”
“But they can’t just kick you out of your home and suggest you stay with two strangers you don’t even know!” ~ ranchojasper
“NTA. Once again, the people accusing others of selfishness are in fact being the selfish ones.”
“If they want to have ‘staycations’ then they can book a hotel… but oh noes!”
“They’re too cheap for that!” ~ 295Phoenix
“NTA… it’s bad enough that they have children and live with a roommate (you shouldn’t have kids until you can afford your own space).
“If they want time alone, they can pay for a hotel.”
“Did you move in with them, or did they move in with you?”
“You’re all on the lease, so they can’t dictate your presence in your own home.”
“I think it would be smart to start looking for someplace else.”
“I’d never live with a family that has kids.”
“Do they pay more for utilities?”
‘Do they pay 2/3rds of the rent?”
“They sound very entitled.” ~ seanthebean24
“NTA. What a ridiculous and immature request.”
“They would have to get you a nice hotel room and pay for your meals, plus any additional costs you might endure, such as transportation or laundry, to make it worthwhile to leave.”
“Staying with strangers ain’t it.” ~ catsaway9
“NTA. Since you pay rent, you have the right to be there.”
“If you don’t mind but don’t want to lose rent, you could ask for them to either refund you a week’s worth or rent or pay for your hotel stay.”
“However, to force you to stay with their family is wrong.” ~ StormyKitten0
“NTA. Tell them they can either rent a hotel for themselves or you, but you’ve already paid to stay at the apartment.”
“If they want an apartment to themselves, they shouldn’t have gotten a roommate.”
“You aren’t being selfish for wanting to live in your own home.”
“You aren’t going to impose on people you hardly know, and even if they say it’s not an imposition, you’d feel like it was.” ~ wlfwrtr
“NTA. I’m of the mind that people fund their suggestions.”
“If they want you to leave for a week, I’d have them pay you a week’s worth of your rent + utilities at the very least.”
“I’m usually a tough negotiator, so if it were me, I’d ask for a month’s rent but settle at two weeks.” ~ THE_Lena
“NTA. Tell them you will leave for a week if they reimburse you for a week of rent and find you a hotel or Airbnb that costs as much as much for that week.”
“Then they can have the house.” ~ waterproof13
“NTA. That’s ridiculous.”
“You’re on the lease; it’s your home, too.”
“They don’t get to kick you out for a week to live with strangers (have they even asked the parents if it’s OK for you to live there for a week?).”
“If they’re hell bent on playing happy married, they’re the ones who need to rent an AirB&B or something for a week.” ~ RevRos
“This is their way of telling you that they no longer want to share their living space with anyone.”
Say no to the staycation and instead quietly start looking for a place to live far away from them. NTA.” ~ hadMcDofordinner
OP came back to chat…
“Hey, everyone!”
“Thank you so much for expressing your thoughts and letting me vent!”
“I’ve decided to let them know I will not be leaving for a week.”
“As much as I love the idea of them paying for a hotel if it was the equivalent of 1/4 my rent, I’d last maybe two three nights at a Holiday Inn.”
“Thank you!”
Reddit is with you, OP!
Stand your ground.
Maybe you can reconsider if they offer you more money.
This is their plan to figure out.
You should be comfortable in the home you’re paying for.