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Nursing Mom Pinches Husband’s Nipple To Prove Point About How Much Breastfeeding Hurts

Mother breastfeeding her baby
Anastasiia Stiahailo/Getty Images

As much as we might like to wish every couple the best, there are some couples who are not meant to last forever, simply because there are milestones they are not meant to cross together.

A key milestone is parenting and the fact that not all people are meant to parent together, reasoned the “Am I the A**hole?” (AITAH) subReddit.

Redditor Expensive_Year3322 unfortunately may have been learning that lesson when her daughter was less than a year old, and she and her husband were having an unusual disagreement about breastfeeding.

Struggling with continuing to breastfeed as her daughter cut teeth, the Original Poster (OP) was shocked that her husband found her pain… funny.

She asked the sub:

“AITAH for pinching my husband’s nipple as hard as I could?”

The OP was beginning to have trouble with nursing her daughter with teeth coming in.

“My husband and I have a 9-month-old daughter. She’s breastfed.”

“She currently has four teeth coming in at once.”

“She’s been biting the absolute f**k out of me when nursing, at least three to four times a day.”

“A few days ago, she made me bleed.”

The OP’s husband was anything but supportive during the transition.

“My husband thinks it’s hilarious, despite seeing me in absolute excruciating pain.”

“When I get p**sed off, stop a nursing session, and walk off, he will say things like, ‘She’s just a baby,’ using baby talk, and following me WITH the baby and while saying things like, ‘Oh no, is mumma mad at the poor baby? It’s not the poor baby’s fault, is it sweetie?'”

“He does this every single time I walk away. Then he usually follows it up with, ‘Aww, how can Mumma be mad at you? Who can be mad at that face?'”

“And for clarification, I’m NOT p**sed at my daughter. She is a baby, and she is teething. But he is a grown-a** man who finds his wife’s extreme pain to be hilarious.”

“This has been going on for nearly a month (she cut two teeth prior to this, and the same thing happened). Every single time she bites me, he starts laughing. Not just a chuckle. Straight up knee-slap laughing.”

“I have told him so many times to stop laughing, because whenever he does, she latches on harder. She now thinks it’s a game.”

“He keeps saying he will stop and that he’s ‘sorry,’ but it’s ‘just so funny.'”

“It’s caused fights. Because there’s literally nothing funny about me being in this much physical pain and I think he’s f**ked in the head to find it funny.”

“And no, he isn’t like this when it comes to anything else. He really just thinks that everything our daughter does is cute or funny.”

The OP decided to give her husband a taste of his own medicine.

“So this morning, we were laying in bed. I co-sleep (with a bassinet that hooks to the bed).”

“She bit me HARD. Nothing I did stopped it. I pulled her face into my breast to get her to unlatch, and it didn’t work. I hooked my finger in her mouth to try and get her to unlatch. She bit down harder.”

“I even flicked her cheek (obviously not hard), hoping it would startle her and make her let go. Nope.”

“She started smiling instead. Why? Because my husband was sitting in the bed, hyena-laughing while watching me struggling with tears in my eyes.”

“She finally pulled back (while still biting) and pulled back enough to make her unlatch. It f**king hurt.”

“He was still laughing. And I don’t know what came over me, but I reached over, and I pinched a hold of his nipple as hard as I possibly could, and I squeezed, and I refused to let go until he physically slapped my hand away.”

“I then said through gritted teeth, ‘I f**king told you to stop laughing when she f**king does that. Do it again, and I’m going to rip your godd**n nipple off.'”

“He’s now calling me a f**king psycho and says that he can’t trust being around me for his own safety and that I’m being abusive.”

“AITAH?”

Fellow Redditors weighed in:

  • NTA: Not the A**hole
  • YTA: You’re the A**hole
  • ESH: Everybody Sucks Here
  • NAH: No A**holes Here

Some had strong, immediate feelings against the OP’s husband.

“I hate your husband, OP. What a complete pr**k.” – TrainTraditional6686

“Hey, OP’s husband: You’re a compassionless and id**tic piece of s**t.” – chodaranger

“OP’s husband is a braindead loser who never should have reproduced. I feel terrible for his family, but especially for the OP who didn’t realize (yet) that she deserved more.” – Stars_of_Sirius

“I absolutely hate this man. Like, a true hate for him. He is repulsive.” – BewilderedToBeHere

“I too choose to hate this lady’s husband.” – tobmom

Others agreed and cited the damage the OP’s husband was causing. 

“Everyone has already pretty well explained everything I find infuriating about the laughing at your pain, conditioning her to bite, how much of an ass your husband is in general, etc.”

“I just wanted to make sure we also take stock of him following you with the baby, narrating what a mean and terrible mom you supposedly are, guilty tripping you, invalidating your pain, ridiculing you for taking the proper steps to gather yourself in a frustrating situation, and otherwise harassing you and trying to incite a negative response from you while simultaneously criticizing and belittling you.”

“Your husband is talking s**t about you to a literal baby. What a f**king weirdo. And one day she’ll be old enough to actually comprehend the narrative he’s spinning.” – gipguppie

“This is completely disturbing. It’s like he’s actually trying to send her mental health over the edge. It’s evil.” – kiwigeekmum

“HE’S PRACTICING REACTIVE ABUSE. IT’S A COMMON TACTIC OF NARCISSISTIC ABUSE!”

“Pushing you to the edge like this is the goal because if you try to explain his behavior, he can easily downplay, but when you lose your s**t (like so), he can DARVO (Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim, and Offender).” – about97cats

“Bullying and belittling mum in front of her child is unforgivable. The child is being taught to engage in the same behavior because she’s being told it brings joy. He is hurting his child by actively damaging the baby’s relationship with her mum.”

“What an absolute piece of trash he is being to his wife and his baby.” – e1ectricboogaloo

“When I started getting serious with my now husband, he started swinging by during Christmas dinner with (my father’s side) extended family. Family humor was to pick on anyone and everyone and just pile on, the meaner the better.”

“He didn’t want to come by the second year after the way they treated him, so I had to tell everyone to not pick on him because he wasn’t used to that kind of humor.”

“While everyone thought he was being ‘a princess’ about it, they obliged from then on.”

“Now years later looking back, I finally see things like an outsider and am like, ‘What the f**k? He was absolutely right for standing his ground on not letting people treat him that way.’ It’s not normal to treat people you care about like that, much less all the f**king time. I always knew my childhood was f**ked up, but that just added an extra layer of ‘what in the f**king world were my parents thinking?!’”

“Like you said, so many f**king traumas were developed by me and my siblings, all in the name of ‘just having fun/playing.'”

“That’s the lesson that the OP’s husband has to learn. The huge difference between him and me/my family? We listened to the boundary that was set, and even if we didn’t totally understand it, we respected it. The OP’s husband DOES need to learn this, but the OP doesn’t have to stick around and let her (ex) husband learn the lesson at her expense.” – chronicallyill_dr

Some urged the OP to exclude her husband from nursing sessions, or her life in general.

“Someone else pointed out, not only is your husband a f**king id**T, but he’s also a stupid id**t because he doesn’t seem to understand that even infants can learn bodily cues and he has taught her to do that to you in order to engage with him.”

“He’s a horrible, horrible person, and he should be deeply ashamed of himself for having the audacity to call you abusive when he has basically taught your daughter to abuse you for his amusement. What kind of sick f**k does that?”

“NTA; tell him he has to leave the house the next time you have to nurse because you can’t risk YOUR safety when he inevitably starts laughing because of your daughter biting you.” – yildizli_gece

“This is the answer here. He’s proven he can’t control himself, fine, he CANNOT be in the room while you’re nursing. When it’s nursing time, it’s Hubby Time Out Corner Time. Either learn to control yourself like an adult, or get treated like a toddler. Right now, he’s the worst kind of toddler.” – TransiTorri

“I unintentionally slapped my young daughter’s face as I was stroking her cheek the first time she bit me. Obviously, I felt awful and cried harder than she did, but she never did it again.”

“Not endorsing this, but it’s still better than her father teaching OP’s daughter it’s a game and that it’s fun to hurt your mom.”

“OP, wean your baby effective right now and make an exit strategy. You might not need it, but I doubt you’ll regret having it. Drag your hubby to counseling as a condition of not moving out.” – westbridge1157

“I’m petty and would be carrying clamps to get him when he laughs at my pain. F**k him, to be honest. Real [c-word] behavior.”

“My firstborn had a deep latch and it made breastfeeding excruciating, period. My husband NEVER laughed. He’d rub my back, bring me a drink, take the baby, anything to HELP me.”

“This is divorceable to me. How someone treats you while you are pregnant and in the postpartum period is telling and worthy of reaction.” – Intrepid-Raccoon-214

“I’d pinch him literally any time he laughed. Saw a funny meme… instant pain. Watching a comedy show… instant pain. Laughed when on the phone with his mom… instant pain.”

“Why? Because nursing is something she is doing for their child, and now she’s not safe doing it.”

“Yes, she could stop nursing, but that should be HER decision, not a decision forced through pain and fear. I’d want him to feel that same level of anxiety of never being safe when doing something necessary and natural.” – olligirl

“NTA and he is a sadist.”

“I breastfed both my babies, and I know the pain you are describing. It is completely reasonable to stop breastfeeding now.”

“Your pain matters. You are a person who matters just as much as your baby.”

“And I’d fully be questioning your relationship, simply for the fact that your husband invited violence, pain, and anxiety into the relationship… for his entertainment.” – Plastic-Bar-4142

The subReddit was infuriated on the OP’s behalf, no question, and they urged her to at least ban him from the room when she was breastfeeding. But others felt the situation was much more serious, because if a partner is willing to cause you pain and laugh at your pain, are they still worthy of being your partner?

Regardless of having a child together, it was clear the OP needed to reevaluate what was happening in her life, and at the very least, set new boundaries.

Written by McKenzie Lynn Tozan

McKenzie Lynn Tozan has been a part of the George Takei family since 2019 when she wrote some of her favorite early pieces: Sesame Street introducing its first character who lived in foster care and Bruce Willis delivering a not-so-Die-Hard opening pitch at a Phillies game. She's gone on to write nearly 3,000 viral and trending stories for George Takei, Comic Sands, Percolately, and ÜberFacts. With an unstoppable love for the written word, she's also an avid reader, poet, and indie novelist.