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Parent Asks If They Were Wrong To Feed Son’s Vegetarian Hindu Friend A Meat-Filled Burrito

Jasmin Merdan/Getty Images

Nowadays kids seem to be allergic to everything under the sun.

This could be because of special dietary needs or many other reasons.

It can make for some problematic situations.

Case in point…

Redditor spazzadourx wanted to discuss their story for some feedback. So naturally, they came to visit the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit.

They asked:

“AITA for giving a vegetarian child meat?”

The Original Poster (OP) explained:

“My 13-year-old has a friend he brings over to our house.”

“The official reason is he is tutoring my son and helping with homework for some kind of gimmicky extra curricular credit at school.”

“But seeing how overbearing his mother is I let them play video games or watch films instead without telling her.”

“Win-win for my son and him both.”

“She is a nightmare smother mother, she told me that I shouldn’t make her son uncomfortable by offering him any food.”

“They are very religious Hindus and strict vegetarians.”

“Can’t eat eggs, cant even eat fruit if it’s sliced with the same knife we use for meat, any food in my kitchen is polluted because we eat meat blah blah.”

“There could have been a more tactful way of saying that, y’know.”

“She’d pack him snacks she pre-approved and he was not to eat anything else. “

“He told me one time she made a huge scene after he told her he ate a snickers bar at school because it contains eggs.”

“He didn’t believe in God and said those rules don’t apply to him and wanted a microwave burrito.”

“My son had foolishly reheated one for himself instead of waiting until his friend was gone.”

“I couldn’t say no, I felt very bad so said he could have one, too.”

“He is old enough to make his choices, but I don’t know if I should be enabling it like this.”

“Especially after how serious his mother seemed about their religion.”


Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed some options to the question AITA?:

  • NTA – Not The A**hole
  • YTA – You’re The A**hole
  • NAH – No A**holes Here
  • ESH – Everyone Sucks Here

Many Redditors were torn whether the OP was or wasn’t the A**hole in this situation.

It’s a tricky situation.

Let’s hear some thoughts…

“YTA. He is a minor and you are not his parent.”

“Hell, you could have made him sick.”

“Our guts are programmed to digest our diets and a child raised vegetarian may not have the proper microbes to enable the digestion of meat.”

“It may seem trivial to you but you could have really hurt this child.”

“Next time you don’t want to hurt his feelings, send him home.” ~ Erythronne

“So we’re all gonna ignore that the kid asked for it himself and said he doesn’t believe in the religion?”

“Is 13 suddenly not old enough to make autonomous decisions like choice in diet?” ~ plutodapimp

“I think this is the point. He requested the food and addressed the issue.”

“It was a peer that introduced the concept; not OP.”

“It’s not on her to police other people’s teenage children’s diets.”

“And she does seem to have attempted to accept the unreasonable duty of care initially, so due respect was given to the other woman’s wishes.”

“Probably the least coercive version of this situation I have come across. NTA.” ~ ComotoastXbox

“I think this is more of an ESH to be honest with a lot of ‘honest mistake’ thrown in.”

‘At thirteen, I knew I was over catholicism and while I would go to mass with my family, I wouldn’t do more than that for it.”

“Most thirteen year olds have a pretty good grasp of whether a belief system is resonating for them.”

“The kid’s mother is being too much.”

“And the kid was hungry and asked for a specific snack.”

“That said, OP could have made him really sick (provided he wasn’t cadging meat on the side for years).”

“Having vegetarian options of the snacks her kids have might be a good middle ground.”

“‘I don’t want to make you a beef burrito like Brian’s because it might make you super sick since you’re not used to it, but I grabbed some bean ones, you want to try it?'”

“There was a similar post a while back about a guy who had a deli and a kid that was coming in to buy snacks that were against his family’s religion.”

“The parents came in and asked him not to sell them to him and he wanted to know if he was TA for letting the kid buy what he legally is allowed to have and has money for.” ~ finntastic74

“He’s probably been eating meat on the side for about a year or so.”

“He seemed confident when he asked OP for the burrito.”

“Plus likely doesn’t eat veg all the time at school.”

“Everyone saying he’ll be violently ill later are being dramatic.”

“Those burritos barely have anything in them anyway.” ~ Ok-Strawberry-7772

“I’m atheist and I still think OP is TA.”

“Kid is a minor and OP knows better or should as a parent.”

“Eating a healthy vegetarian diet isn’t abuse.”

“The kid can choose to push boundaries on his own as part of growing up.”

“OP deliberately defying the parents’ wishes is unacceptable.”

“People have all sorts of rules for raising their children that I may disagree with.”

“But unless the child is actively being harmed, I keep my opinions to myself.”

“I don’t have to agree with vegetarianism to respect it as a lifestyle or religious practice.”  ~ Erythronne

“YTA. Not your kid, not your rules.”

“He should be able to make his own decisions regarding food.”

“But this is a conversation he needs to have with his parents, not with you.”

“How would you feel if your son went to another friend’s house and their parents didn’t agree with your rules so they let him do whatever he wants?” ~ anchovie_macncheese

“I think it’s not just about the food either to be honest.”

“His mum thinks they are working, when actually they are watching films and doing video games.”

“OP is not being open with the kid’s mum.”

“I’d want to know the age rating on those- if I had a 13-year-old and his friend’s mum let him play/watch 18 rated films and games, I’d want to know.”

“I’m sure a lot of parents would be fine with it, but that doesn’t make it ok to do without parents permission.” ~ Infamous-Magician180

“The problem here is that some parent’s hard rules are pretty much limited to things that are safety and security related.”

“And other parents’ hard rules have more to do with policing their kids choices and behaviors in a way that others would find age-inappropriate.”

“This is a conflict of authoritarian vs. authoritative parenting styles.”

“As an authoritative parent, I actually would not enforce authoritarian rules for my kid’s friends.”

“Even if their parents with authoritarian styles demanded that I do that.”


“As an authoritative parent, I’m going to give boundaries and guidance.”

“And if my kid sees me deviate from that to enforce rules on their friend that wouldn’t ever be on the table in my household, that’s going to make a negative impression on my kid.”

“Ultimately, one major problem with authoritarian parenting is rebellion and disobedience.”

“Because a lot of children really lose respect for parents with authoritarian parenting styles when they see the cracks and weaknesses in the parent’s own life.”

“And those issues will have to be the authoritarian parents’ hill to die on.”

“They cannot reasonably expect to create an isolated environment for their kid where other people are enforcing their own household rules.”

“In this situation, I’d probably give them the burrito.”

“But then have a discussion with the kid about how he will decide to manage the situation with his own parent, knowing that she has put some hard restrictions on his diet choices.” ~ myaltaccount_3464

“I agree with the NTA to an extent.”

“At 13, kids are starting to see and understand the bigger world.”

“They can start to make choices on themselves. If this boy comes with a packed snack to eat at your house, your son should be able to eat a snack in front of him.”

“If he wants to go against his parents wishes, that has to come from him.”

“When my kids were younger, we lived across the street from a family that didn’t eat pork.”

“When the kids were young (7-10) they would be able to tell me what they could and could not eat.”

“Marshmallows we’re on that list for a reason I still don’t understand.”

“I would always go out of my way to make sure there was food in my house they could eat.”

“I remember one day ordering pizza.”

“I got a cheese and pepperoni pizzas.”

“The boys were always good with knowing what they could eat, so I didn’t monitor them.”

“I came into the kitchen assuming there would be a large part of the pepperoni still, but nope, pep was gone, but cheese not touched.”

“I looked at them and said it’s on them, and I wont defend their actions when mom calls me.”

“To this day, I still respect what they are supposed to eat (now 16-20 years old).”

“But they would rather eat the pork.”

“At some point in time, the kid has to make choices for themselves.”

“I just wish it was easier for some of these kids to do that.” ~ No_Fix_3094

Reddit seems all over the map here, OP.

There’s definitely no easy answer.

Good luck with the smother mother.