It’s all about the wardrobe.
Every piece of clothing is a statement.
Everything from a full suit to jockey shorts says something to the world about the wearer.
That’s why it’s questionable when people buy one another clothes that could feel… “inappropriate.”
So what does one do?
Wear it in public, of course.
Case in point…
Redditor aitabikini wanted to discuss her experience and get some feedback. So naturally, she came to visit the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subReddit.
She asked:
“AITA for wearing the ‘joke’ bikini my friend got me?”
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
“So it was my birthday couple months ago. Had a party. Got some gifts.”
“My friend ‘Mandy’ got for me a ‘super cute bikini.’ I liked it. Said thanks.”
“She had ripped the tags off, but whatever.”
“Anyway. Went to the community pool with my roommate. Wore bikini. Got in the water.”
“Roommate immediately is like uhm girl… I look and see that this bikini is now kinda see-through.”
“Haha, good joke Mandy.”
“Anyway, Mandy invited me over to her place to hang out with her and her B[oy]F[riend] and a few others.”
“Most leave and we’re still hanging out.”
“I’m like hey, what if we get in your hot tub? I go change after them.”
“And meet her BF in the hot tub while she’s getting new drinks. I hop in.”
“Immediately, he’s looking at my chest.”
“I pretend I don’t notice and just make small talk.”
“She comes out a few minutes after. And just looks in shock.”
“Eventually she gets in.”
“’Uhh is that the one I bought?’”
“Yeah I love it. I wear it everywhere.”
“Make up some stuff about how I wore it to the beach, some party with lots of guys, etc. and she’s just like ‘oh.'”
“We’re in the tub for 20-30.”
“Eventually get out and change.”
“She approached me after and was like… ‘Uhm I’m sorry, I thought you’d notice. But it goes kinda see through.'”
“I’m like yeah I know.”
“Why’d you buy me a *ucking see thru bathing suit?”
“She’s like it’s a joke. Wait you knew? “
“So you just spent the last thirty minutes flashing my BF on purpose?”
“I reply I’m just wearing my birthday gift from her.”
“Anyway. AITA?”
Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed some options on the question AITA:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Many Redditors declared OP was NOT the A**hole.
“I’d say her friend is the a-hole for giving her that ‘joke’ swimsuit in the first place.”
“OP didn’t say she was ‘okay’ with it, just because she was willing to flash her friend and her friend’s boyfriend doesn’t mean she was willing to be unknowingly exposed in public.”
“The fact that she sought revenge for it is a pretty strong indicator IMO that she wasn’t okay with it at all. Girl was pissed, and who can blame her?” ~ QueenSlartibartfast
“Mandy is totally TA for intending to embarrass OP.”
“She planned on OP wearing it and being humiliated when it turned see-through.”
“She did not, however, count on her man being the recipient.”
“NTA, OP. Well played.” ~ Suckitupbutttercup
“Not seeing many people taking advantage of the term ‘birthday suit.'”
“Regardless, NTA.” ~ Mirewen15
“NTA. She knew what kind of gift she was giving you, you were just getting her back in a harmless way.”
“No one’s gonna die from seeing boobs.”
“Now you can all have a laugh about it.” ~ su1cidesauce
“Right?! Like OP was embarrassed at the community pool from this, and wouldn’t have noticed if not for her roommate being there.”
“She opted to play a private joke on her friend to get her back for it.”
“The only thing I’m iffy on is involving the boyfriend as a completely unrelated party, but apparently he did not mind or complain or I’m sure he would have left the hot tub.”
“NTA OP.”
“Some people have to learn hard lessons and you took her to school.” ~ beepborpimajorp
“Ahhaha OP this is fantastic.”
“I won’t give a judgment.”
“I’m leaning fairly heavily towards no a**holes here but a part of me does feel like everyone sucks ’cause you did purposefully do something that you know would bother your friend.”
“She absolutely deserves it though.”
“And you simply outplayed her.”
“She was playing checkers when you were playing cheese. Well done.” ~ REDDIT
“NAH. ESH if you squint.”
“Her joke was just as harmless as yours.”
“Not tasteful, in my opinion, but harmless and not a**hole-y.”
“I don’t see it as much as either of you being jerks, and more like a back-and-fourth prank.”
“Now you’re on equal ground, lol.”
“(Also, if her boyfriend was distracted that’s on him, not you or her.)”
“Edit: Obviously it’s embarrassing at the moment, but it’s not going have long-lasting effects (besides maybe on their friendship lol).”
“That’s all I meant by ‘harmless.'”
“That, and the fact I don’t see that what she did was any worse than what her friend did.” ~ malachitenecklace
A few Redditors felt a little different…
“ESH. Two wrongs don’t make a right.”
“Your friend sucks for trying to publicly embarrass you with that bikini.”
“Assuming, of course, she knew how transparent it would turn in the first case – you haven’t really said how you knew this was on purpose, yet.”
“But you suck for flashing them for 30 minutes on purpose in a hot tub after a night of partying.”
“Both of these situations are about missing consent.”
“I get it, the boyfriend probably enjoyed it and your friend will get over it.”
“But in the end, you flashed them for 30 minutes without their consent – which isn’t cool.” ~ snorting_dandelions
“This thread is insanity. YTA.”
“It was a joke gift.”
“Friends can pull jokes on each other.”
“This joke can be comfortably told in MANY social circles.”
“They probably assumed they could trust you.”
“Knowingly flashing someone in a way that your friend wouldn’t appreciate?”
“Where is the joke in that?”
“They pulled a prank in good faith, you pulled this off in bad faith.”
“They were wrong for thinking that you were mature enough to handle a joke.” ~ reallythinkinghard
“ESH, at best.”
“Her for getting you a see-through bikini, though your reaction indicates this type of gag gift is acceptable between you two.”
“Are you two the kind of friends where you can intentionally sit naked in front of her boyfriend for a half hour?” ~voxplutonia
“I mean if you wanted to show your boobs to her boyfriend you could have just done it.”
“Her buying you a gag gift and you knowingly flashing her BF for half an hour aren’t the same type or level of prank.”
“Not to mention you did it to teach her a lesson, not to get a good laugh.”
“You aren’t an a**hole as much as you’re a desperate attention seeker.” ~ TarHeelTaylor
“YTA. You should’ve known boundaries as a friend.”
‘Unless you two hate each other and aren’t actually friends.”
“Of course, typical male-centric Reddit is saying not the a**hole.”
“But what you did was really disrespectful to your friend.”
“If it was just the two of you it would’ve been ok but since her boyfriend was over YTA and did it on purpose.” ~ taran-tula
But for the most part…
“NTA but you’re a hair’s breadth from being an A yourself and turning this to ESH.”
“Here’s the deal, she bought you a bikini that would go see-through when you didn’t know it and would probably be in a public place, with a group of people she had no idea who.”
“She gave you a gift as a ‘prank’ but really it was for the purpose of causing you to feel shame and embarrassment.”
“Because this could have happened in front of friends, or family, or perfect strangers of any sensibility and age… her prank is beyond just a giggle between friends.”
“It’s involving random and unknown people in her ‘prank’ whether they want to see it or not.”
“She’s clearly an AH.”
“Now you… your prank back at her… you are running to the line so close to becoming an AH yourself.”
“The only thing that saves you is that you limited the innocent third parties involved in a way Mandy didn’t.”
“You were in a semi-private setting.”
“Her place in her hot tub.”
“You were in a group of people that you knew everyone who would be subjected to it.”
“And yes, her BF became collateral damage.”
“I’m making an assumption that you know him a bit and could have made some sort of prediction about how he’d respond (whether he would be offended, or think it’s funny, or whatever).”
“Assuming that’s true, I think this actually stayed on this side of still being a prank, without actually crossing over to A territory.”
“It’s a bit of a mean-spirited response prank, but it’s still way less mean than her supposed ‘prank’ on you.” ~ Ollivander451
Reddit is with you, OP.
Your methods could be in question, but it doesn’t feel like malicious intent.
In the future, you may need to have a deeper convo with your friend about what you like to wear.
And she needs to learn about subtle humor.