Weddings can be a wonderful celebration of love and the extension of family. They can also be super stressful for those planning and maintaining the event.
But after it’s all done, you get some wonderful memories of the time together with those you care about. That’s what Reddit user excludednot thought would happen.
The original poster (OP) had a few issues with her sister that led her to the “Am I the A**hole” (AITA) subReddit to find out if she reacted properly.
“AITA for not including my sister in a family photo?”
Sounds harsh, but there’s more to the story.
“I (32F[emale]) got married 4 years ago. My younger sister (30F[emale]) didn’t attend because my wedding had a no children condition.”
“At the time my other siblings (4 older brothers, 1 older sister) also had young kids but all of them attended my wedding. My younger sister was the only one who chose not to.”
“Her son was 14 months old at the time. She didn’t want to leave him. I tried to accommodate by saying I could book a hotel room (I got married in a hotel ballroom) so that she could leave her son with her MIL in the hotel room and check on him regularly.”
“Her MIL didn’t mind, but my sister refused. I also offered to pay for a babysitter but that was shot down as well. She didn’t seem to want any option other than bringing her son to the wedding.”
“She ended up not attending my wedding.”
“My wedding went off without a hitch. Aside from her everyone else from my family was there. I even had cousins, uncles and aunts who travelled in from different countries to attend my wedding.”
“After the wedding I went no contact with her. She tried to pretend like she didn’t skip the wedding and that our relationship would go back to normal. Obviously, it did not.”
“The next three years we did not have any communication. Last year we reconciled after our dad begged us to. She apologized and said she was suffering from extreme anxiety and didn’t want to be away from her son. We buried the hatchet and moved on.”
“Onto the issue: my husband and I are finally buying a house so I went and printed several of my wedding pictures to put up in the house. I printed a picture of my parents and siblings with my husband and I on our wedding day and framed it.”
“It is going on our living room wall. My younger sister isn’t in the picture as she didn’t attend the wedding. She is upset because she was excluded in the picture.”
“She wants me to Photoshop her into the picture and I said no.”
“If she wanted to be in the picture she should have made the effort to attend my wedding.”
“I have already printed the pictures and don’t want to reprint. Adding her in by Photoshop may compromise the quality of the pictures. Those are the reasons why I said no.”
“She claims that I’m punishing her by doing this. I do have other pictures of her + our family that I’m intending to put up in the house, but my wedding pictures are my favorite and the ‘main’ attraction.”:
“My family have mostly stayed out of the drama but my older sister did say she thought I was being petty.”
On the AITA board, Redditors pass judgment with one of the following acronyms:
- NTA – Not the A**hole
- YTA – You’re the A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everybody Sucks Here
Comments agreed the sister’s request to be edited into the photo is too much, but also think OP’s actions were wrong too.
It was determined everybody sucks here (ESH).
“ESH. I think you were a dick originally for cutting contact when she chose not to attend your wedding.”
“You can totally have a no kids wedding but if someone doesn’t feel comfortable attending apart from their young children and you decide to cut them out of your life because of it, you become an asshole.”
“However, I also think she’s now in the wrong for asking for the photoshop.” – maggienetism
“You went no contact with your sister, because you chose to have a child free wedding, and she chose to stay with her 14-month-old instead?”
“Yeah: you suck. Big time. Don’t have child free weddings if you’re not prepared for people with children (and reasons for not wanting to leave their children) to not come.”
‘I printed a picture of my parents and siblings with my husband and I on our wedding day …My younger sister isn’t in the picture as she didn’t attend the wedding. She is upset because she was excluded in the picture. She wants me to photoshop her into the picture and I said no.’
“This is, in a word, completely f’king ridiculous.”
“You both qualify for that adjective.”
“ESH — both of you need to get over yourselves. Talk about life is too short.” – Dszquphsbnt