As the saying goes, “When you gotta go, you gotta go”.
When, being the operative word, you can never be too sure where that will be.
If the situation is dire enough, you will most likely need to settle for the first available place you can find, no matter how unhygienic.
But if you have the luxury of choice, you would naturally err on choosing the more pleasant option.
A recent Redditor was lucky enough to share a two-bedroom, two-bathroom apartment with their boyfriend.
Much to the original poster (OP)’s annoyance, however, the OP’s boyfriend seemed to only use one bathroom to do certain business.
The bathroom the OP needed to use to get ready in the morning.
When the OP made an effort to change this situation, they found themselves more or less begging to deaf ears.
Wondering if they were being unreasonable, the OP took to the subReddit “Am I The A**hole” (AITA), where they asked fellow Redditors:
“AITA for telling my boyfriend to poop in the 2nd bathroom when i’m using ours?”
The OP explained how the use of their master bathroom in the morning proved to be a point of contention between them and their boyfriend:
“My boyfriend takes like 7 sh*ts a day.”
“Whatever.”
“We live in a 2 bed, 2 bath apartment with our 4-year-old and cat.”
“Since he’s constantly pooping, it’s a frequent occurrence that he will go in our master bathroom while I’m in the middle of getting ready for work etc. and drop a nasty sh*t.”
“I have to sit there for fucking 10 minutes waiting so I can get back in there, and then I have to finish getting ready in his stinky poop air.”
“I’m being so serious yall. I just think it’s rude to knowingly blow up the bathroom someone is using to get ready when there’s a perfectly functioning other bathroom.”
“He just ‘doesn’t like it’ as much.”
“So I’m forced to breathe toxic @ss air.”
“He laughs it off and thinks I’m being extra.”
“I think he needs to cut the sh*t.”
“Pun intended.”
“He’d just be using the toilet, whereas I need my things that are kept in our bathroom.”
“So AITA for requesting he use the other bathroom when i’m using ours to get ready?”
Fellow Redditors weighed in on where they believed the OP fell in this particular situation, by declaring:
- NTA: Not the A**hole
- YTA: You’re the A**hole
- ESH: Everybody Sucks Here
- NAH: No A**holes Here
The Reddit community unanimously agreed that the OP was not the a**hole for asking their boyfriend to poop in their second bathroom in the mornings;
Everyone agreed that not only was the OP’s request perfectly reasonable, but everyone also urged the OP to get their boyfriend to see a doctor as soon as possible, as he seemed to be pooping an inordinate amount of times:
“NTA.”
“He is being purposely inconsiderate.”
“Can lock the door while you’re getting ready?”- Ok_Conversation9750
“NTA.”
“One, he needs to see a doctor.”
“Two, if someone who says they love you can’t comply with a simple request knowing it would make your life better, they need to grow up.”
“He doesn’t feel like respecting a tiny request?”
“What else doesn’t he respect?”- revengeofthebiscuit
“NTA.”
“It’s not unreasonable to ask him to use the other bathroom when you’re getting ready.”
“You deserve to have a clean space without dealing with the aftermath of his frequent bathroom breaks.”
“It’s about basic consideration and sharing the space fairly.”- Mean-Hair-5759
“The amount of women that post this exact issue is f*cking insane.”
“Why are you ladies putting up with this long enough that there’s even a situation to post about?”
“I say it often here.”
“YOUR NORMAL METER IS F*CKING OFF.”
“Recalibrate that sh*t.
“No, it is not normal to lack so much self-awareness that you sh*t in a space your SO is actively getting ready in.”
“No it is not normal to ignore and laugh and dismiss their complaint that it’s not only f*cking putrid but also rude and inconvenient.”
“No, it is not normal to refuse to use the second toilet during those times your SO is ALREADY USING THE SPACE.”
“Am I crazy!?”
“Tell him to f*ck off and either use the second toilet or wait for you to finish.”
“Why the hell are you allowing this disrespect?”
“I wanna day y.t.a just due to the a**holery toward yourself but no you’re obviously NTA.”-beautyvagabond
“NTA.”
“It’s absolutely vile and borders on a fetish at this point.”
“If I were you, I’d move all my stuff into the 2nd bathroom just to see how he reacts.”
“If he has any anger at all then you know he enjoys doing this to you, if it wasn’t already obvious.”-boringcranberry
“NTA.”
“But I will never understand why women put up with such ridiculously sh*tty dudes.”
“And no, I’m not trying to hear ‘this is how men are’ or anything similar cause this sh*t is so out of pocket.”
“I know a bunch of really sh*tty dudes, but not a single one who would make his gf or wife sit in his sh*t air instead of using the other bathroom, especially not after she complained about it.”-Secret_University120
“NTA.”
“This is a power play.”
“He’s literally sh*tting in your space.”
“Is he a passive aggressive kind of guy?”- DVGower
“NTA.”
“This is gross, disrespectful, and unnecessary.”
“Take everything you need for your morning routine into the bathroom with you and lock the door.”
“He can either poop elsewhere, or wait until you are finished.”
“His choice.”- SlovenlyMuse
“Your boyfriend needs to see a doctor.”
“NTA.”- Aitaburneracc_
“NTA.”
“There is nothing preventing him from using 2nd bathroom.”- Walktothebrook
“I think the larger question is why are these men sh*tting so often?”
“Like is the plumbing just better, more efficient in a male body?”
“It’s insane to me, and the total inability to hold it for even a few minutes.”
“My husband goes into a full panic if our bathroom is unavailable for the 10 cumulative hours that he needs it to relieve himself.”
“It’s affecting our quality of life at this point.”
“NTA.”- Kbizzyinthehouse
“NTA.”
“When you get ready in the morning, go into the bathroom and lock the door until you’re done.”
“Take everything you need for getting ready into the bathroom with you so you don’t need to leave for anything until you’re finished.”
“When he inevitably tries to get in, say you’re busy and keep that door locked until he goes to the other bathroom.”
“He’ll learn.”- itsurbro7777
“NTA.”
“This is insanely inconsiderate and disguising.”
“He should use the other bathroom.”- southerntakl
“NTA.”
“That’s super gross and inconsiderate of him.”
“It almost sounds like he thinks it’s funny to stink up the bathroom when you’re trying to use it.”
“You should lock the door when you’re using the bathroom to get ready.”
“He has another option.”- PeachBanana8
“NTA.”
“Oh my god, how foul!”
“I suffer from IBS and use the bathroom frequently too, I would never think of subjecting anyone to what I’m also going through.”
“OP does your boyfriend often pull power plays on you?”
“If you think you might find this helpful, there’s a quiz on the linked site to help gauge if you’re in a healthy relationship.”
“It was the first tool that opened my eyes when I was in an abusive relationship.”-IndependenceMajor666
“NTA.”
“Your boyfriend is properly disgusting and rude tho.”
“What do you see in him?”
“Wouldn’t you love a stank free life?”- HildegardeAF
“NTA.”
“But I genuinely don’t understand how I see so many women on Reddit dealing with grown men’s shit, literally.”- b*tch-in-real-life
“NTA.”
“Sounds like a power play by him.”- Ok-Bottle-5296
“NTA, that’s so inconsiderate.”- SetSilly5744
“NTA, he and his butthole are tho.”- draynaccarato
“NTA.”
“Boo to 7-sh*t shane there.”- paul_rudds_drag_race
“NTA.”
“Your boyfriend is being an inconsiderate jerk.”- sophanose
“NTA.”
“What the f*ck is with his weird power trip?!”
“I’m sorry but he is a major issue.”
“Does he do this for other things too?”
“I’m actually really curious if you think back, does he always do sabotaging stuff to you, or inconveniencing for you and then laugh at you?”
“This just sounds frustrating.”- CoCoaStitchesArt
“NTA and he seriously needs to go see a doctor.”
“That’s super rude and disrespectful to you.”
“Does he not courtesy flush or use air freshener either?”
“Gross.”- undercover_ravioli
“NTA.”
“If I know I’m going to wreck a bathroom I choose the one farthest from humanity.”
“On a side note, does he have a dietary intolerance?”
“Dairy?”
“Wheat?”- mint-star
It would be one thing if this only happened every so often.
But this seems to be an almost routine occurrence, so much so that the OP’s boyfriend almost seems able to adjust his plans and reroute to their other bathroom.
However, as many above have pointed out, the OP should be more concerned not about which bathroom their boyfriend uses but rather the amount of times their boyfriend needs to use the bathroom…