Ahhh, in-laws… the wedding gift you didn’t ask for but you end up with anyway.
Don’t get us wrong, many people hit the jackpot with their bonus family, but not everyone gets so lucky.
So it should be considered a major win if your spouse gets on well with your family.
But according to one man on Reddit, there is such a thing as getting along too well, so much so that he turned to the “Am I The A**hole Here” (AITAH) subReddit to seek feedback from fellow Redditors after his wife accused him of cheating based on a drawing by her niece who he is close with.
Redditor mr_bapu__2706 asked:
“AITAH for being distant to my wife after what she said?”
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
“My wife(25/F[emale]) and I (27/M[ale]) have had our were having a great married life.”
“We were planning for kids and starting a family.”
“She has got a sister who has a good sense of humour so in family gatherings we laugh and joke alot and her daughter is a cute little girl the girl doesnt have a father and I always feel bad for her thus I play video games with her many times.”
“In a recent family gathering where I didn’t go cause I had a meeting.”
“I received a call from my wife she was extremely angry and asked me to get to her parents home like it was a do or die situation.”
“So I talked to my boss lied to him that I got a medical emergency and left.”
“When I reached her home she was crying and as soon as she saw me she and her parents just went ballistic they started yelling at me cussing me and calling me names and they accused me of cheating her with her sister which I thought was baseless and so I asked them why they think like that and then she shows me a drawing made by her sister’s daughter in which I and my wife’s sister are kissing and my wife goes by the logic that the girl drew what she saw.”
“i tried to give reason ny saying that The kid is around 6 7 years old the reason behind that drawing could be anything.”
“And they again said preety nasty stuff to me.”
“So I told them to just go and ask the kid why see drew that.”
“They go ask her and the kid says she drew It because she wanted my wife’s sister and me to be together when my wife ask the kid that if she had seen us doing it he said no.”
“I was angry on my wife because why wouldn’t she have trust on me.”
“why was her trust so low that a drawing made her feel threatened and there words damaged me too.”
“It has been 1 week now And I have been rejecting her romantic advances and today she said that I was overacting and i an c*nt.”
“AITAH?”
After several comments by people wanting information regarding his wife’s sister, OP shared an update.
“Update:so many people have been asking what happened to my wife’s sister.”
“Well she was there too and they were trash talking both me and her and she was furious about the accusations.”
“All I know is after 2 days of incidents my wife’s sister and her daughter left her father’s house to go live somewhere else.”
“And many people suggest that I prove my wife right by being with her sister but I am not interested in her I love my wife and her sister is just a friend I joke with on family gatherings nothing more”
Redditors weighed in on the situation, agreeing that OP is “not the a**hole” (NTA), with many expressing their outrage alongside OP that his wife only believed him when a 6-year-old confirmed his story.
“NTA – but I would be concerned that no one gave you the benefit of the doubt.”
“Your wife riled up her parents and you walked into a situation where she gave you no heads up whatsoever, this would cause me to look deeply into what you really want, to forgive and forget, or is this a sign of continued behavior?” – MericaMercyMe
“NTA.”
“Your wife owes you a pretty serious apology for (a) the false accusation, (b) jumping to conclusions, (c) not taking seriously the effect of the accusation on your feelings and marriage.” – I_DOM_UR_PATRIARCHY
“NTA.”
“Your wife didn’t trust you in a key moment and expects everything to go back to the way it was?”
“She’s selfish and immature.” – Key-Awareness9200
“How the hell did your wife know it was you and that you were kissing her sister? 6 year old label it?”
“I wouldn’t be over at her families for a LONG damned time until they each apologized repeatedly and I could tell they meant it. I would probably ask the wife to go move in there for a while and maybe think about counseling before allowing her back.”
“This is a bell she can’t just unring or pretend she didn’t go full a** crazy on you.”
“She broke YOUR trust over a kid’s picture without even talking to the damned kid for confirmation.”
“NTA” – Mueryk
“This is the universe telling you to get out now before you make babies”
“If you ignore the universe, you will regret it one day”
“I guarantee it”
“NTAH” – The_Crown_And_Anchor
“NTA.”
“Wife is a double a** for not speaking with you privately and apologizing when she realized she was wrong.”
“I would put distance between all your in-laws.”
“This includes the sister-in-law and her daughter.”
“It’s one thing for her to want you with her mother, another to draw the two of you kissing.”
“Who knows what is being said at home.”
“The parents were also a**es.” – Kind-Replacement5788
“NTA”
“This is divorce level.”
“Wife and her parents were bad enough from the start.”
“They would have all have to put in TONS of effort for a long time to try to make things right…if that was even possible”
“Wife doubling down, gaslighting when everything is all completely her fault completely seals the deal” – OctoWings13
“That’s a hard pass to just get over.”
“She showed zero faith in you without even asking the little girl why she drew it.”
“That’s the king of thing that cannot be undone once done and was nearly as bad for your marriage as if you had been kissing her sister.” – N0b0dy-Imp0rtant
“NTA. Your wife was over the top.”
“She didn’t trust you, and didn’t even bother to check her suspicions.”
“She isn’t an expert in children’s drawings (It’s a whole complicated discipline, not an amatur amusement).”
“You have every right to be angry.”
“You say you have been rejecting your wife’s romantic advances.”
“But what you aren’t saying is that she ever apologized or admitted that she was wrong.”
“It seems that she just expected to coast through it without accepting culpability, and when you didn’t go along with it, she became abusive.”
“Which means that she doesn’t think she was wrong, and next time something like this happens, she will do the same thing.”
“If you want to save this marriage, you should at least insist on couples therapy, without making any long-term promises.”
“And then see how it goes.” – DawnShakhar
Some even warned OP that his wife might cheat on him if he continues to withhold… if she hasn’t already, that is.
“NTA, I’d be really pissed about that too.”
“I can’t say what you should do next, I ain’t you, but your emotions are justified.”
“Edit: If she’s getting pissed that you’re not putting out, she might well cheat now.”
“She might not have cheated previously, she might not even think she has it in her, but this level of suspicion and not having her needs met certainly preps a recognizable pattern.”
“Prep up a lawyer regardless.”
“And if she matures up enough to genuinely apologize, you can always tell your lawyer your circumstances have changed for the better and you don’t need his services anymore.” – Juggernox_O
“Gonna call it.”
“She is cheating on you. Its projection 10000%.”
“There is no coming back from this.”
“Gather all your personal belongings so she cant mess with them.”
“Every conversation going forward needs to be recorded as she will try more shady sh*t.”
“Get a consult with EVERY divorce lawyer in your state/province so she cannot hire them as it will be a conflict of interest, get a SHARK of a divorce lawyer and leave her with nothing.”
“Let her rot on the street. Do not touch that c*nt ever again.”
“Do not be civil to her. Do not be nice to her.”
“Be vile. Be evil.”
“Get sweet cathartic revenge on that disgusting b*tch. NTA.” – Difficult_Elk9963
“Nice language… It’s terrible. Her first thought was that you must’ve done something awful.”
“Then, when proved wrong she’s still calling YOU names.”
“And her parents didn’t think that maybe there was another explanation?”
“They should all be begging for forgiveness.”
“I’d be looking at those male friends of hers a little bit closer if I were you. NTA” – chica771
It certainly seems like OP has a lot to figure out, but hopefully he can at least find a little comfort in knowing his fellow Redditors don’t believe him to be in the wrong whatsoever.