Content Warning: Fat-shaming, Body-shaming
Most of us will only have a few people who are truly "in our corner" at any given time, which is part of what makes those people so special and dear to us.
But no one should be in our corner quite like our romantic partner, pointed out the members of the "Am I Overreacting?" (AIO) subReddit, and if for some reason they are not in our corner, then they have no right to date us.
Redditor _Remy_Buxaplenty_ had been married to their husband for about a year, and while they had a fair number of problems in their marriage already, the most glaring issue was the fact that their husband allowed his friends to fat-shame and body-shame them.
When they tried to talk to their husband about it and realized he'd never stand up for them, the Original Poster (OP) knew this wasn't the right marriage for them.
She asked the sub:
"Am I overreacting for leaving my husband because his friend made pig noises at me?"
The OP's husband's friends regularly fat-shamed and body-shamed her.
"My husband and I have a laundry list of issues that we’re currently working through in our first year of marriage."
"One of those is the way his friends talk to and about me."
"It’s become a recurring conversation that we’ll be with his friends, and at some point or another, they make a fat joke (amongst other jokes) about me."
"I don’t care when they call me Timmy Turner because I have buck teeth, I don’t care when they make fun of my interests or music taste, but I have an autoimmune kidney disease that I was diagnosed with in 2024 and am still adjusting to how it’s impacted my body."
What really hurt the OP was the fact that her husband did not stand up for her.
"Long story short, my husband and his friends were hanging out the other day, and I was eating some ice cream."
"One of his friends told me to 'stop eating' and then made pig noises at me."
"I was hurt."
"His other friend spoke up and said that wasn't cool."
"Then the rest of them lectured me about how I need to just bully them back if it affects me so much."
"I said I didn’t feel the need to stoop to that level and said that my husband should be defending me."
"They laughed right in my face."
"This has been going on for some time now. I’ve asked my husband to defend me, I’ve spoken up about how it’s affecting my self-image. I’ve even gone so far as to have an entire organized conversation with the friend who did this to tell him to stop making jokes about my body several months ago."
"So it’s not like this is news to my husband that it doesn’t sit well with me. I’ve said this isn’t okay with me about 200 different ways."
"My husband didn’t defend me, and didn’t even address the situation for two whole days."
"I immediately got up and left the house for the entirety of the day following this situation."
The OP didn't see their relationship improving.
"At this point, I’m not only hurt by the situation but more hurt that my husband is comfortable letting me be the butt of a joke in a room full of his friends."
"So, I told him I lost respect for him, and I lost respect for our relationship, and that although it’s painful and I love him very much, I have to exit the relationship."
"He’s now telling our friend group that I am being mean to HIM because I want to end things."
"AIO?"
Fellow Redditors weighed in:
- NOR: Not Overreacting
- YOR: You're Overreacting
Some reassured the OP that their husband should absolutely be standing up for them.
"Good lord, we can go on about his friends, but you have a serious husband problem, and it ain’t fixable."
"I’ve been with my wife for 28 years, and nobody, and I mean nobody, disrespects my wife. Ever. And I don’t give a f**k who you are." - Alarmed-Speaker-8330
"If one of my friends were being this disrespectful to my partner, there'd AT LEAST be a conversation happening. If they were doing it in our home to their face, that conversation would be get out and a follow-up one of 'we're done.' To let it happen repeatedly is so nasty."
"NOR, at all OP." - Amethystdust
"NOR. What a dips**t. It's fine for his friends to insult and demean you, but when you say you're done, you're being mean to him? Like, how much of a manbaby is he?"
"I'd serve him the papers and then, when he starts to cry, give him a pacifier as a parting gift." - Autumn_Falls0131
"My friends making fun of my wife's appearance would be no small thing. I would need to physically be held back from hurting them if they talked to my girl the way that OP is describing. They certainly wouldn't be in our lives moving forward, that's for sure." - MovieTrawler
"NOR. A good husband never would have let this continue. He would have stood up to his friends right away. You are right to leave. You deserve better." - Wonderful-Tea3940
Others theorized that the husband was probably making jokes behind their back.
"If the friends are fine with doing it to her and in front of her husband, it's most likely because the husband is doing it behind her back with them. That's probably also why they busted up laughing when she suggested he defend her." - Cruxis87
"NOR, jesus no, get away from this clown, he's more married to his manosphere polycule than he is to you."
"Mocking you for lulz when they KNOW you have a medical condition? What are they, 13? No. Get away, get away, get away."
"And I am willing to bet that your health problems improve to an extent that may surprise you, once you're out of this constant bombardment." - Dame_Niafer
"You remind me of a chill backyard beer party I was at one evening when an almighty SLAP rang out. All the noise stopped, and we heard the irate husband say, 'Don't talk about my wife like that.'"
"Also, what is the husband saying behind your back that his friends feel okay acting like this?" - Fast-Bumblebee-9140
"Your husband understands why you’re upset, but he doesn’t care. And he agrees with them, that’s why he isn’t saying sh*t about them bullying you."
"Your husband doesn’t respect you. And honestly, I’m not even sure he likes you at this point. It’s time to file for divorce and leave this piece of garbage in the dumpster out back where he belongs." - BeautifulChaosEnergy
"Men don’t seem to realize that when women are done with poor behavior, it is like going down a hill. You can’t stop it. And then they wonder why someone would leave over something, in their opinion, is small. It is not. It is the accumulation of things." - sassypbd
Some applauded the OP for leaving and not putting any more time into this marriage.
"Please divorce this man. You deserve so much better than he’s offering. Not even the fact that his friends are horrible, terrible people, but your husband doesn’t have your back one bit. Move on and find someone that actually likes you." - alicebarber79
"You're still in your first year of marriage?! Please don't waste any more of your life with this AH."
"I hope you don't have any children with this loser. Divorce, move on, and find someone who loves and supports you."
"I bet health will improve once you're away from this jerk, too." - TropicalDragon78
"NOR. You're married to a man-child. You deserve someone who has actually finished growing up." - zonutsthefirst
"NOR. Your husband and his friends sound like teenage boys, literally down to the last bit, 'He’s now telling our friend group that I’m being mean to him because I want to end things.' It’s like he’s not even taking it seriously that you are done; he thinks he’s being punished."
"Leave and be much, much happier for it." - Ok_Drink8072
"H**L NO. Not only is he a horrible human being, but so are his friends. He should throw them all out of his house. Immense disrespect shown to you... and he says YOU are being mean??" - Stressedmama58
"OP needs to be in an environment where her body and mind feel safe, and her nervous system can heal. Marriage is supposed to be a refuge, not a hostile obstacle course spent shackled to your worst enemy."
"Her health and her future are not worth this spineless creep. I think she should stop warning him she’s going to leave and get a lawyer. Do whatever she needs to do to stay safe and protect her finances. He is not going to behave well when it happens." - No_Birthday9816
The subReddit was shocked by how little support the husband showed the OP, and they could only guess what he must be saying behind the OP's back to make his friends feel comfortable shaming the OP.
Fortunately, the OP was already making the right decision by moving toward divorce before even posting, so now they only needed to stay committed to the fact that they deserved better and to follow through with those divorce papers.
Single life would surely treat them far better than this.
u/TheEllaBullet/Reddit
u/TheEllaBullet/Reddit 
u/TheEllaBullet/Reddit
