In life, preparation is everything.
Many often say one of the biggest ways to prepare for success is wellness.
Wellness includes getting enough sleep.
When people are on a healthy sleep schedule, they tend not to oversleep.
Oversleeping can come with some troublesome consequences.
Redditor Adventurous-Hold8832 wanted to discuss their experience and get some feedback, so naturally, they came to the “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) subreddit.
They asked:
“AITA for not waking up my roommate for his job interview because he’s irresponsible?”
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
“My roommate had a job interview he wouldn’t stop talking about.”
“The night before, he stayed up playing video games until 3 AM.”
“Apparently, he didn’t set an alarm, and told me, ‘I’ll wake up, don’t worry.’”
“Spoiler: he didn’t.”
“I got up, saw him still asleep 30 minutes before his interview, and decided not to wake him.”
“I figured if he can’t handle setting an alarm for a life-changing opportunity, it’s not my job to save him, and that he will need this as a lesson.”
“He missed it and is blaming me for ‘not having his back.’”
“I told him I’m his roommate, not his mom.”
The OP was left to wonder:
“So, Reddit — AITA?”
Redditors shared their thoughts on this matter and weighed some options to the question AITA:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
Many Redditors declared that OP was NOT the A**hole.
“NTA, but also not smart.”
“Unless he can cover the whole rent on his own, it only benefits him to make sure his roommate has a job to begin with, so he covers his portion of the bills.” ~ aBeverage0fSorts
“NTA as you say, you’re not his mother.”
“Of course, you do still have to live with him now, so there’s tension in YOUR life that you could have avoided.” ~ PhoenixRisingToday
“You’re not going to live with him forever.”
“He also learned a valuable lesson— that the world doesn’t give a crap about him and his needs.”
“Only he cares about him, so he needs to man up and take care of it.”
“He shouldn’t be trusting that some Good Samaritan is going to have his back.”
“You’re not his mom as you said. NTA.” ~ endosurgery
“And ask him what his reaction would have been if he didn’t have a person to live with?”
“I’m guessing he would realize he had only himself to blame.”
“He really would have been responsible for himself, which he and everyone should be regardless of roommates or not.”
“Like you said, you’re not his mama. If he can’t handle that you didn’t automatically set yourself up as his personal alarm clock then that’s his reality sinking in and letting him know he isn’t living with Mom and Dad anymore. NTA.” ~ Twilight_Skip34
“NTA… but when he can’t cover rent and you gotta cover it or get an eviction notice, you also can’t complain.”
“Not sure why you wouldn’t make sure his half of the rent is going to be secured.” ~ aBeverage0fSorts
“As the mother of your roommate’s separated-at-birth twin, I say you are NTA.”
“People who do this will only change when other people (including their moms and roommates) stop making life easy for them.” ~ labsnabys
“OP has stated that the roommate has a habit of being irresponsible and lazy.”
“The roommate made a choice to stay up until 3 am playing video games.”
“Yes this might be Reddit, but that is not how the majority of the working-age population function.”
“You have a job interview the next day, prepare, and get a good night’s sleep.”
“You don’t blame your roommate for not waking you up because you stayed up too late, are tired, failed to set an alarm, and apparently have little accountability for your own actions.”
“If I were OP, I’d be claiming I had my own appointments that needed to be kept and I wasn’t home.”
“Not my issue.”
“If they were otherwise a motivated individual who was actually trying, sure, I’d wake them up.” ~ anakaine
“NTA, at all, not even a little.”
“If he was worried about waking up, he could have come to you and asked for help making sure he didn’t oversleep his alarm.”
“Even then, it wouldn’t be your responsibility, but at least he’d have taken some measures to be present for the interview.”
“He didn’t do the bare minimum. I’d start looking for a new roommate situation, this doesn’t sound like a long-term solution.” ~ Anakin-vs-Sand
“NTA. If he can’t be an adult and do the adult things, that’s on him.”
“You’re not his keeper or responsible for him.”
“You’re right, it’s not the job that will save him if he can’t even set an alarm.” ~ Inner-Nothing7779
“NTA… his arrogant @ss couldn’t be bothered to set an alarm, why is it your job to clean up his mess?”
“Hopefully he learned a lesson.” ~ SPlNPlNS
“NTA. It would have been a nice move to wake him up, but you aren’t his parent.”
“You may have screwed yourself over though, if he needs that job to pay rent… lol.” ~ No-Assistant8426
“He knew he had an interview, yet he chose to stay up late the night before.”
“That was his decision.”
“Clearly he didn’t care that much about the job if he didn’t prioritize it over staying up late and not being prepared for it.” ~ AsparagusOverall8454
“NTA, he knew he had a big interview.”
“You mentioned it the night before and he made the decision to stay up until 3 AM anyway and even went out of his way to tell you not to worry about it.”
“He’s a big boy who should be able to wake himself up for this supposedly super important interview and if he can’t even manage that then he shouldn’t have the job.”
“Plain and simple.” ~ Sandman4999
A few Redditors disagreed…
“ESH. Yes, your roommate should have set the alarm.”
“It is their responsibility fully.”
“But you saw they were asleep and could have had their back and decided to let them suffer.”
“You must hate your roommate and hope they can’t pay their share of the bills.”
“They’re mad because they just learned you’re a d-bag.”
“They thought you were a friend, and you’re not.”
“So embrace the new position.” ~ CSurvivor9
“ESH. Him for sleeping late and missing an alarm, I guess.”
“But What did you gain from going out of your way to be a bad friend?”
“Was it worth it to post here and be validated by some people?”
“You’re not his mom, sure, so I don’t get why you had to assign yourself the role of teaching him a lesson.”
“As someone else said, if anything beyond you giving him a nudge would’ve caused him to mess up the interview, that would’ve been on him regardless.”
“But sometimes, as people, you just have to look out for each other, and this would’ve taken very little effort for you.” ~ mar__iguana
“ESH, like yeah, he’s an AH for not being responsible to be ready and awake in time.”
“But if you knew what’s up, saw him asleep, and just left him there out of spite, that makes you an AH.” ~ raheemnaz
“YTA, if it’s for an interview… I don’t know just wake him up.” ~ ares21
Reddit continued…
“NTA. I have a coworker at work who tried to b**ch me out for not calling or texting her when she came in 3.5 hours late to our shift we worked together.”
“I told her you are an adult, I am not your manager or your parent, and I am not responsible for chasing you down and making sure you get up and come to work on time.”
“That falls on you.”
“That being said, there’s been some tension between us since then when we worked together.”
“Maybe with that in mind, you did a bit of a disservice to yourself, if anything, since you have to live with them after the fact.”
“That being said, not responsible for your roommate’s irresponsibility.” ~ Yahdunnow
“NTA. If I have learned anything from having a ‘helper’ and people-pleaser personality, it’s that once someone starts treating you like a parent, they’re not likely to stop.”
“It’s obviously important to help friends, but it says a lot about what he expects from others that he blames you instead of himself for missing the interview.” ~ timorousworms
“NTA. I think you saved his potential employer a headache.”
“You know what I do when I have to get up early the next morning for an important appointment?”
“I go to bed at a decent hour.”
“Besides, he told you that he would wake up and for you not to worry.”
“Not your circus, not your monkeys.” ~ ivylass
“NTA. You have it exactly right.”
“If he gets a job, are you going to be waking him up every morning to make sure he goes?”
“No, because you’re not his mom.” ~ Deep-Okra1461
“NTA. If he landed the job, would you be responsible for making sure he gets up every day for work?”
“Give someone an ounce of compassion, and some people will take you for granted the entire time they know you.”
“You are not responsible for a grown-a** man not being able to get up for a damn interview.” ~ Kirby12_21
“As far as his employment record goes, he’s better off not being offered the job than getting fired for too much tardiness.”
“OP is NTA.” ~ popoPitifulme
“NTA to him but possibly one to yourself. Is he paying rent?”
“Are you able to cover his portion to avoid eviction?”
“The context appears to be that he doesn’t hold himself accountable for much.”
“I don’t think 30 min before his interview would do him much good anyway.”
“I’d personally have sprayed him with water but I also don’t like roommates so I live alone.” ~ Xiaoshuita
“NTA, obviously.”
“He’s your roommate, not your child or spouse (and even in those cases, there are arguments to be made for teaching responsibility and managing alarms).”
“Your roommate is an idiot.”
“You didn’t cause him to miss an interview.”
“He did it to himself.”
“Was he going to expect you to wake him up on time for his first day on the job too?”
“If my wife asked me to wake her up at a certain time, I’d tell her to set an alarm instead, because I don’t want that responsibility hanging over my head.” ~ Expensive_Plant_9530
Reddit is with you, OP.
You said it best… “You’re his roomie, not a parent.”
Yes, you could’ve woken him up.
But this was his responsibility.
Hopefully, this was the wakeup call he needed.